Indian Book Reviews - Reviewers hiring!
Because we know it is not easy for everyone to understand a few Indian aspects and writing it is even harder.
Entries from all over Indian subcontinent - not just India, are accepted
If your book is not Indian...
Title : Tangled love. Indeed, we agree love is messy either being in a romantic relationship, friendship or sibling bonding, and especially the one we share with our parents. This is what I had an idea after reading the title at first. I say that was short and powerful description of what you want to show through the story as a writer. Well done!
Cover : It is expressing beauty. We know it is the story of Kayna and that is what you are trying to show with the alone girl in the cover picture which is awesome. But I personally think it is depriving Kayna to look gloomy contrast to her lively personality. Besides the mystic feeling is pretty behind the thought of your picture.
Blurb : I am envious of your choice of luring the readers into the story, a mysterious sneak peek! You know us too well because once when we read something a vague part of brain keeps thinking – why was the situation like that? What could have happened after that? And, that is how you engage readers into thinking about the epidemics of the story and why to look forward to it. That could not have been better than that, awesome.
Summary -
It wouldn’t be surprising if I say that the story is an awesome narration part of growing up, a little adventure, a little rebellion.
Honestly it took me back to my days of having a blast with friends being crazy and lovely. Thanks for it, and I loved the theme of your story. The way how Kayna, Rohan, Kriti and Darshan bond is very beautiful. On an emotional level it is very connecting at points, but seeing on the writing base I hope you understand that it needs much of polishing and you have a plus there. The story is already engaging and all you need to do is filter and alter the narration beautifully which indeed is going to appeal many more readers, who indeed will be proud of your work!
Analysis and Evaluation –
Plot : The happiness, love for each other among the friends of our lead characters is beautifully woven. It really takes many happy thoughts to express a beautiful storyline and develop statistics of character relationships, you have done a great job in the thinking part. I really loved the parts of how balanced the happenings in the story very well. Of course, there are parts where you can improve and I haven’t read the complete story so I will not give suggestions also. You are the writer so it is completely up to where you see fit for changes, necessarily.
Nonetheless end of the topic it is a beautiful yet difficult concept to work on, well done.
Characters : OOH! I am so in love with them, reminds me of few crazy friends of mine and even myself. The main leads are well built and I loved the thing that you didn’t jump directly into pairing Kayna and Darshan. And, then the relation between Rohan and Kayna is very beautiful and connecting. But we have got a sketchy problem a teeniest one though. To grab more attention to the story it is very important to elucidate the characters well. Use the full length of your vocabulary knowledge to make a reader either love, hate or feel disdain to a certain character, And, that is how villains are made, even heroes. Because the one we love we love is our hero and the contrast is villain, so it is in your hands to describe in such a way that an emotion evokes after knowing him/her as characters. You have done well with Kayna, like expressing how hot tempered and sweet she could become at the very moment.
Descriptions : You have used this area very well in your favor. Like you really have an upper hand here and if you improve a bit on giving more to the scene, like a good balance between the characters involvement and pickle touch of what is even happening then that will open the imagination of the reader as if living the characters of either of the friends. And once you ace that there is no stopping for you from becoming a pro!
Sensory flow : This is a little something you need to work on with. There are few readers who like to enjoy the emotion and then move on to what is going to happen next. This is where I would request you to read the story yourself again and see where are the times you are jumping emotions, like one minute you are talking about something and the next it becomes something else. It would be nice to have a balanced equation between fast and slow pace, like a medium.
Vocabulary, Grammar and Punctuation : Being a writer I understand how messy sometimes we become when updating in haste, not because we aren’t good at it but instead it is for the reason that we want to express the best to the readers so that they could enjoy the journey. I loved your dialogue deliveries very much. And the scope for you to improve is in the punctuation point. Not serious issues but once you give a onceover read to the chapters you will automatically polish and filter them. Grammar at times did go out of place maybe due to the confusion of the situation, but again if not improve now than when!
Conclusion and suggestions :
It was a beautiful story with constructive plot and I made it a point to play Darshan Raval’s tracks while reading the story (I used to be a fan of Darshan from when he was in RAW). I think I have done my part of suggesting little by little in the above parts but at the end I would like to add generally Wattpad chapters are 1500-2000 in length and I know you were upset about not writing many words but now maybe you can collaborate chapters!
Anyways the end line is the story was captivating in its own way.
