Virago: She Who Can See The Future

Ikadalawampu't walong Kabanata

Ikadalawampu't walong Kabanata

W A R R E N

“I am not your real father.”

It was one summer noon when we were walking along the fine sands of a beach and those were the exact lines of my father.

He must probably thought I didn’t hear what he confessed. Inulit niya pa ito. Sa pagkakataong ito ay huminto na siya at hinarap ang isang batang tulad ko. He knelt down and held my shoulders.

“I am not your real father.”

Mas mabagal ang pagkakabigkas, mas malinaw pa kaysa sa maalat na tubig ng dagat na ngayon ay iniilawan na ng buwan. Tumango lang ako.

“Are you not mad at me for keeping it a secret?”

Umiling ako. “No, Dad. I knew it since then.”

Kung iniisip niya na si Mommy ang nagsabi sa akin, nagkakamali siya. It was only confirmation that I needed to prove that my dreams were true.

I was four when I started seeing the past of a person. Habang tumititig ako sa mga mata nila ay bigla akong nakakatulog. Namamalayan ko na lang ang sarili ko na nananaginip ng mga nakaraan nila

Most of my dreams that time were mostly about my mother. Sa panaginip ko ay mayroon siyang kasamang lalaki na kumakalong sa isang sanggol. Sa likuran nito ay isang batang lalaki at babae. Nalaman kong ako ‘yon dahil sa nunal sa kanang kilay at sentido ng bata.

“He must be my father,” I thought to myself.

The next dreams added to my suspicions that I wasn’t the real son of the father I grew up with. This time, I know what is true.

Pagkatapos magbakasyon ay nagtungo kami sa bahay nila Lola. It’s a big house coated with white and the roof was maroon. Dito kami nananatili kapag nagtatrabaho na sila Mommy at Daddy at hindi nila ako mababantayan.

I preferred staying here. Lola’s nice, she gives me what I need. Si Lolo naman ay palagi ring wala dahil sa negosyo ng pamilya. Another reason why I love here is because I can play with Walter, Ximena, and Kuya Kenzo. Walter is my cousin and he is years older than me but he does not like to be called as Kuya. He likes to tease me of being too much sensitive. Maliit na bagay lang daw ay iniiyakan ko. Magkasing-edaran lang yata sila ni Kuya Kenzo while Ximena is of my age.

Among the playmates I had, Ximena was my favorite. Kahit minsan ay hindi niya ako inasar sa pagiging iyakin. Lagi siyang nandyan para patahanin ko. She was the only girl who could make me laugh even when I’m crying. Bagay na bagay sa kanya ang ipit niyang pigtails sa tuwing naglalaro. Her chinky eyes, fair skin, and cheerful smile were like the sun that could lighten up my day.

Pagkatapos naming mangolekta ng holen ay umupo kami sa tapat ng pintuan ng bahay.

“Susunduin ka ba ngayon ng mama mo?”

Napakibit-balikat ako. “Baka oo, baka hindi.”

I tried so hard to speak in Filipino. Sa school ay English Language Policy. I am grateful that we speak Filipino in our house.

“Ba’t ‘di mo alam?”

“Busy sila, eh.”