KABANATA 31
I am looking at her beautiful face. She’s sleeping quietly. Marahan kong hinaplos ang pisngi niya at ginawaran siya ng mabilis na halik sa labi.
My Addy.
Napangiti ako nang hinigpitan niya ang yakap sa akin. Maddy Caught my attention when I saw her giggling with her friends outside the campus. I stayed there for about fifteen minutes just to watch her laughed. Hindi ko alam kung bakit pero gustong-gusto ko siyang makita na tumatawa.
I didn’t know back then na kapatid siya ni Kyline. Kyline who’s so persistent, jolly and sweet. I really like Kyline. Until that Day she introduced me to Maddy. Nakita ko kung paano ako irapan ni Maddy na nakapagpatawa sa akin. Iyon ang unang beses na nakita niya ako kaya medyo nagtaka pa ako dahil bigla na lang niya akong inirapan.
Ganon na lang ang gulat ko nang sabihin ni Kyline na kapatid niya si Maddy. I can sense her awkwardness lalo na nang maiwan kaming dalawa sa sasakyan. I know she’s tense for what reasons? I don’t know.
All I know is I like looking at her. I like the way she laugh, how she moves her hands, how she roll her eyes and how she talks with irritation on her voice.
I am comfortable having her beside me. I don’t like girls following me but Kyline is differenet and Mddy is much more different.
I cant be rude to Kyline thats why I let her follow me. And Maddy, She’s not following me but I like her beside me.
Nang araw na malaman ko na may nagugustuhan siya ay parang gusto kong saktan ang taong yon. I want to know that person so I can teach him a lesson for making maddy feel less.
That day she didn’t went to her class. Kinabahan ako. I thought something happen to her. Hinanap ko siya kasama si Kyline at nakita ko siya sa may lumang building. I want to scold her.
Papagalitan ko na sana siya nang makarinig ako ng mga kaluskos. I know someone is there. Hindi naman lingid sa kaalaman ko na may mga death threats pa rin sa buhay ng magkapatid dahil sa pagiging mayor ng Ama nila.
I know they had their bodyguard na laging nakatingin sa kanila sa malayo but that doesnt guarantee their security and safeness. Mabilis kong tinakpan ang bibig niya upang hindi makagawa ng ingay. I know shes scared but I am more worried.
I scold her instead of comforting her and it makes me a big idiot! Gusto kong sapakin ang sarili ko dahil nasigawan ko siya.
I don’t know why. I am confused. I know I like Kyline, Not just like but love her. Pero kapag nandiyan si Maddy ay nagugulo ang sistema ko. Wala akong ibang nakikita kung hindi siya. Bawat galaw niya, bawat buka ng bibig niya ay nakasunod ang tingin ko sa kanya.
Until that day. The party. Parang sasabog ang dibdib ko sa sobrang galit. Some fucking bastard touched her and its unforgiveable. I am mad and furious again. But to my surprise she kissed me. Ilang gabi akong hindi pinatulog ng halik na iyon.
And then nabalitaan ko na lang na wala na sa pilipinas si Maddy. I want to call her and talk to her but I cant. I already have Kyline and I am trying to convince myself that I don’t have any feeling for Maddy.
And then she came back. I am surprise. Masaya ako na nagbalik na siya. Then she confessed her feelings to me. Hindi ko alam kung ano ang mararamdaman ko. May bahagi sa akin na masaya dahil sa nararamdaman niya pero mas lamang ang guilt. I am attracted to my Girlfriend sister. And I am not sure if the feelings she felt for me is real or just infatuation.
Masakit ang makita siya na umiiyak pero mas masakit na lumayo siya sa akin. I want to be selfish and have her but its wrong. I have Kyline and I want to be loyal to her.
Then that very night when I saw her at the bar. Parang gusto kong bugbugin ang Xander na yon! That damn bastard kissed Maddy! Parang gusto kong pumatay nang gabing iyon. I want to punch his damn face hanggang masira iyon. How dare he Kissed Maddy?!
I don’t care if she will get mad. Ang alam ko lang ay may nararamdaman akong kakaiba sa dibdib ko. And this feeling is killing me!
And that night I heard her talking to Kyline.
Galit at sakit ang naramdaman ko nang gabing iyon.
‘Ask me to leave him and I will do it.’’ thats the exact thing I heard from kyline at malinaw sa akin ang naging pag uusap nila.
Again I get mad at Maddy because I thought she asked Kyline to leave me. Ayoko na gawin niya akong parang laruan na maaari niyang hilingin sa kapatid nya. I am not mad because of what Kyline said. Mas galit ako sa kaisipang gusto lang akong gawing laruan ni Maddy. She cant just asked anyone to have their boyfriend.
And I regret that night.
Kyline broke up with me.
And that day Happened. When Kyline died.
Huminga ako ng malalim at inalis ang iilang hibla ng buhok na nakaharang sa mukha ni Addy.
I will do everything to know what happened to Kyline. I build my owned agency to protect Maddy and to uncover the mystery behind Kyline’s death.
Sa nakalipas na taon ay wala akong ibang ginawa kung hindi mangalap ng impormasyon sa pagkamatay ni Kyline. I overheard her father and the police officer talking about her death sa mismong araw ng lamay niya.
It was a confidential case kaya hindi nakalabas iyon sa mga tao. And I am investigating this case for the past years. Walang lead dahil nananatiling sarado ang kaso. All I know is the name of their bodyguard. Ariel and it was the last name Kyline mention.
I want to know the truth because I am guilty. Hindi ko sinasadyang sabihin kay Maddy ang mga sinabi ko ng araw na iyon. I just want her to get mad at me.
Mas madali para sa akin ang umalis. I don’t want to leave her but I need to. At iyon lang ang paraan para magalit siya sa akin at mas mapadali ang pag alis ko. Dahil kung mananatili ang nararamdaaman niya sa akin ay baka hindi ko kayananing umalis. Hindi ko kayaning iwan siya. I want her to hate me by blaming her.
But I never thought it will cause her much more pain. Im such an idiot.
Huminga ako ng malalim at tinignan ang mukha ni Maddy. Mahimbing pa rin siyang natutulog.
Mas hinigpitan ko ang yakap ko sa kanya. I regret those hateful words I said to her. Dahil mas galit ako sa sarili ko. Sinubukan kong balewalain ang nararamdaman ko sa kanya at magfocus sa misyon ko. My mission is to uncover Kylines death and to protect Maddy. But again my heart thump faster when shes near. Ang epekto niya sa akin kapag malapit kami ang nagpapabaliw sa akin.
And earlier I just made love to her. I cant conttol myslef. God knows, kung paano ko kinontrol ang nararamdaman ko pero nang makita ko siya kanina ay nawalan ulit ako ng kontrol. She driving me crazy.
Hinalikan ko ang ulo niya at marahang hinaplos ang pisngi niya.
“I'll make it up to you Addy.” bulong kong muli at muli siyang hinalikan.
I will do everything to know the truth.
“I promise to protect you at all cost.”
Lalo na ngayong may matibay na akong ebidensya.
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