Kabanata 40
A Little Braver
"Diyan ka lang muna, ah?"
Iniwan ako ni Mommy sa harap ng nakabukas na hardin sa likod ng ospital. Ngayon ko lang nalaman na may ganito pala rito.
Nagulat ako nang may tumulak sa wheelchair at hindi ko magawang lumingon para makita kung sino man 'yon. Siguro ay si Mommy pa rin.
Pumasok kami sa hardin at bumungad sa akin ang napakaraming klase ng bulaklak. Pero ang pinakamalapit sa akin ay ang mga asul na rosas.
I'll be the one
That stays 'till the end
And I'll be the one
That needs you again
And I'll be the one that proposes
In a garden of roses
And truly loves you long after our curtain closes
The wheelchair took a halt and the person behind me walked infront of me to properly face me. I was surprised to see Ephraim in his formal wear as he slowly kneel down before me.
But will you still love me
When nobody wants me around
When I turn 81 and forget things
Will you still be proud?
Cause I am the one
That waited this long
Inilabas niya ang isang itim na kahon at inilahad iyon sa harapan ko.
"And I am the one that might get it wrong... And I'll be the one that will love you the way I'm supposed to, girl..." he sang the next lyrics of the song. "Elisha Seraiah Francisco, marry me and let's watch the stars together, forever. Are you up for it?"
Proud of me, of my short list of accomplishments
Me and my lack of new news
Me and my selfishness
Or me and myself wish you nothing but a happy new version of you
Cause I, I, I...
"Y-Yes, I'm up f-for it."
His thin lips curved for a smile before locking me in his arms. Tears streamed down my face but this time, it wasn't because of sadness or my longing for him. Like the title of the song that he just sang, it was because of happiness.
"Finally," he said under his breath.
Ephraim then slid the engagement ring in my finger and kissed the back of my hand before holding my nape and pulling me for a one sweet kiss.
I want you to tell me you find it hard to be yourself so I can say,"It's gonna be alright."
And I want you to love me the way you love your family, the way you love to show me what it's like to be happy.
The kind of love we have wasn't something that every body understands. The love we have changes over time and it's not always plain, or black and white. The love we have splashes in pastel colors of sunsets and sunrises. Something that—maybe—wider than the ocean's boundaries and can travel farther than the shooting fireworks in the sky.
In love, it's not always about seeking for other people's approval. I guess it's a kind of silence that it's okay if only two people could get. As long as our hearts beat for each other, I see no way to end it and do it with any other.
"I love you," he whispered in my ears as he pull me for another embrace.
It was my first time hearing him say that word but I know he already said that without directly saying those eight letters.
He often says 'I love you' without saying 'I love you'.
When he hugs me to sleep when I find it hard to calm myself or after I've lost my cool. No words said, no screams heard, no apology demanded.
Or when he smiles everytime I caught him staring at me. Teases me until I blush and he just won't stop even after I told him it's not funny anymore.
Or he will send me flowers at any time of the day when he wasn't at the hospital room with me. The bouquets of gypsophila that he sent were all over my room and I feel delighted whenever I look at them.
He hides his smile when I compliment him but he grins when I wear a new set of clothes. Especially the ones he personally picked and bought.
The years passed and the love I feel for him grows deeper and deeper day after day. Two months were now over and I couldn't count the moments we spent with each other after he came back.
Now, I am engaged. I will soon marry the man I love. I am beyond grateful.
"I-I love you," I whispered back with tears in my eyes.
All these years later, and I can still make him turn his head for me. Like what I said before, it was the little things he did that tore the thickest walls I built to guard my heart. It was the little things that soon became a big thing for me as time passes by.
From the bouquet of flowers he randomly gives, or those days he's made my coffee before his own, those nights he let me use his arm—or his chest—as my pillow... His late night visits just to check if I'm already rest asleep, or those days he would let me use his favorite MP3 and share his playlist with me...
Ephraim could be a man of few words, but he could also be a man who has so much to say. A week before he proposed, he told me everything that happened to him in Amsterdam. And the one dream he wanted to accomplish if he was given a chance.
"But it changed through time," he whispered. "I don't want to be recognized by my father anymore. I just wanted to be forever recognized as my Mom's son, as Tita Sarah's son-in-law and as your partner in life. Husband, in other word."
Ephraim wasn't like everybody else and he wasn't always consistent. But I know that he's trying his best to be. Despite of our illnesses, we try to make the most of our days together.
We spend it with the closest people in our lives and I was glad that he grew close to AUGUSTUS as well. Kahit kay Mommy ay maganda ang samahan nila.
With December comes the glimmer on her face
And I get a bit nervous
I get a bit nervous now
In the twelve months on
I won't make friends with change
When everyone's perfect can we start over again?
Love is powerful, indeed. It conquers heavy storms and strongest winds.
The playgrounds they get rusty and your
Heart beats another ten thousand times before
I got the chance to say
I miss you
As I spend my next days with Ephraim, I also think about Calumn who I unintentionally hurt while I was aching. But I was glad that we were able to have the closure we need. We were able to talk it out. And I was always grateful because I have a friend like him.
When it gets hard
I get a little stronger now
I get a little braver now
And when it gets dark
I get a little brighter now
I get a little wiser now
If I will be given a chance to change my past, I won't try to remove any of it and replace it into something that would benefit me. I won't have this life any other way. I was contented and I was glad that I met those people that celebrate with all of my successes right now.
From my mother to Mariette and Psalm, Nurse Marie, Tamara and the rest of AUGUSTUS including Kiel, and Ephraim... I'd rather die than to not see them in my present.
Because with them around, I can always get by. I can survive. And they are the reason why I strive to be a little braver each passing day.
This is more than enough.
BINABASA MO ANG
The Great Escape
Teen FictionCOMPLETED. Seraiah was diagnosed with Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis and going in and out of the hospital became part of her daily routine. Her days became dull and her condition gets worse each passing day. Until she met Ephraim, the stubborn son o...
