Blood Sweat & Tears: A BTS Story ✅

Chapter 9: The Stress

A couple of weeks have passed since That Night and That Morning, and I've settled more into my position as their assistant. Lots of running around to get things the boys have forgotten, scheduling, and then rescheduling meetings. I've been doing my best to be there for the boys when they need me, but also trying to establish a professional relationship by keeping my distance as much as possible. The routine of this new part of my life has taken shape and I'm trying to make myself fit into it.

BTS is about to embark on a long 9 month would tour, and I am supposed to go with them. I'll be visiting countries I've never been to before, and experiencing things for the first time, and for that I'm excited. What I am not excited about is that there will be no escape, no buffer, between me and the boys. I will be with them 24/7, only a short walk down a hotel hallway or a glance backstage. This is great for my career, as I can learn so much in this position about the music industry and touring. But then again, do I want to make a career out of this? Why did I agree to this job in the first place?

Oh right, because I would have been deported.

I took the job from the fear of having to go home and face what I had been running away from. Part of the tour would be visiting the US and how was I going to deal with being back in the exact location that I've been avoiding? I don't know. I thought about quitting and asking to be reassigned to a more permanent job within the company that doesn't involve traveling, but I said I was fine with it in the beginning and I can't go back on my word now. But I know deep down that I won't quit no matter how much this all scares me. I won't abandon the boys.

We haven't even left yet and I already feel like I'm treading the water we will be flying over. Due to the traveling nature of the tour and for safety reasons I was allowed to tell my mom about my position, and it honestly went better than I expected. Which just means it didn't end it tears or screaming.

"What do you mean you're the assistant to a kpop group and you're about to go on a world tour? I thought you were a school teacher?" her voice grows higher and higher with her concern.

I rubbed at my forehead, prepared for this reaction after growing up with a libra for a mother. "I got fired and the principle helped me find another job so I could stay in the country under my work visa."

"Fired?!" she squeaks, "Christ, Rose, this is a lot to process."

"I know, I'm sorry for dumping it on you all at once, but with the NDA I signed it had to be like this."

It's like she didn't even hear me.

"Wait, if this is a world tour, that means you'll be back in the US for a bit right? Do you know when? Or how close you will be to home?"

I knew the answer, of course, the tour schedule had been made months in advance, "I haven't been given that information yet, but I'll let you know when I do. I just didn't want you to worry about traveling and my safety."

This made her pause for a moment.

"Yes, I would like you to send me an itinerary so I know what country you are in and where you are staying so I know where you are in case something happens to you."

"Nothing is going to happen, mom. I'm traveling with celebrities, not getting sold to traffickers."

"Well, you just never know these days," I could hear the dismissiveness in her tone.

After the call, I remembered why I wanted to leave in the first place.

This was going to be a great opportunity, I just had to keep my personal feelings locked uptight.

Today at work the boys were in the dance practice room going over choreography. Hobi was like a completely different person when teaching dance. The sunshine boy with a beautiful smile was nowhere to be seen in the dance hall.