Darling,It's Cold Outside.

Twelve

*WARNING*

This chapter will contain self-harm. If you are sensitive to this, please don't read.

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Jess's POV

It's a good thing we didn't have a show for four days, I really can't do anything right now. Since we don't have a show, we're staying at a hotel until we have to hit the road again. Kellin, Kate and Cope got their own room since they have a baby. Jaime and Tony have their room together across from Kells. Justin and Gabe are next to them. Nick and Jack are at the end of the hall. Jack and Alex obviously have their own room together. Rian and Zack got their own separate rooms because they think it's weird for two straight guys to share a room. And Vic and I are on a whole other floor; right above Kells and Kate. Alan got on a plane home to stay with Austin for a few days. Elijah and Aaron are sharing a room the room next to Tone and Jaime. And Keag went to New York to meet up with Amy on her tour.

I was sitting in mine and Vic's room by myself after I begged Vic not to leave me alone after what happened last night, but he had to go down to the police station to fill out a report and answer some questions. He assured me that the guys will be watching over me until he gets back. I was trying to distract myself by watching TV, but that didn't help. And the guys checking up on me every 2 seconds didn't help my paranoia at all. I was curled up in a blanket watching Supernatural and waiting for Vic to come back.

Over an hour has past and he still isn't back. I picked up my phone to ask if he was okay, but it turns out that he already texted me.

From: Viccy <3

10:34 am

Hey Jess :) everything is fine, some things are just delayed. I'll be back soon. I love you.

10:45am

Hey Jess. :) Almost done talking to the police, they want to talk to you too, but I told them it wasn't a good idea. It'll all be over soon, I promise. I love you.

10:56am

On my way back to the hotel. Sit tight babe. I love you. :)

I smiled at the thought of Vic coming back. At this point, I'm relying on him to protect me. I decided to take a shower so I got up and grabbed one of Vic's dirty shirts so I can smell him all day. Yeah I guess that sounds creepy, but it's comforting. I grabbed a clean pair of black underwear, my bathroom bag and a towel and went into the bathroom. I shut and locked the door, turning on the light to revel the medium sized bathroom. There was a single white counter with a mirror over it and a sink inside it. The toilet was next to the counter and the shower was across from it.

I turned on the water, turning it almost all the way to the left so the water was hot. I picked up my bathroom bag and was digging for my lavender scented body wash when I felt a sharp pain on my finger. I pulled out my hand quickly, examining the small cut on my middle finger. I emptied the contents of my bag onto the counter and heard the sound of metal hitting porcelain. I froze and stared at the thing on the counter; a small, sharp piece of metal was sitting by the sink with some of my blood on it. I was a blade from a pencil sharpener, I swear I got rid of all of them. I've been clean for almost three months now, but looking at the blade made me want to do it again. I turned away from it and shook the thought out of my head. I started to undress and I hopped in the shower, I realized that I forgot to grab my body wash so I jumped out of the hot water and into the cold air and quickly grabbed it. But I didn't go back into the shower immediately. I looked at the blade once again and contemplated it more. I slowly picked it up and brought it in the shower with me. I placed it on the soap holder thing and cleansed my body not once, not twice, but four times. I was trying to wash that asshole off of me, obviously that wasn't going to scrub him out of my mind, but it made me feel better.