Defying Fate

Fate 01

Chapter 01

I always have this mindset that if it's not meant to be mine, I let it go as I hope that what's meant to be mine is much better.

Like how I failed to enter my dream college university which is DLSU. I passed the entrance exam but unfortunately, I wasn't able to get any scholarship. I couldn't bear to make my parents comply with what I want. Ayoko ipilit na makapasok duon at pahirapan ang mga magulang ko para makapagbayad ng sobrang mahal na tuition fee. Hindi kami mayaman. Alam ko ang hangganan ko.

I ended up in the community college in our small town. Truth be told, I hated this school for no reason. Well, I could say I hate their uniform. Every time I pass by this school, I can't see myself going there. And I heard many rants about how bad the quality of education was.

But I had no choice. Wala kasi akong back up plan dahil nakapokus ako sa pagpasok sa dream school ko. I also ended up taking another course which wasn't my dream course because it wasn't available in the community college.

How fucked up right?

Everything that I planned out ever since Senior High School? Nabasura... Hindi nangyari. Yet I want to be optimistic and thought that maybe...just maybe, I was meant to be where I am right now. Siguro hindi para sa akin lahat ng plano ko.

"Torreto? Bakit ka nandito?"

Hindi ko alam kung ilang beses ko nang narinig iyon mula sa mga schoolmates ko rati. Maraming may kilala sa akin dahil naging parte ako ng Student Council at naging presidente pa ng Science Club. Not that I am bragging , they know me for sure.

"Hindi ba nakapasa ka sa La Salle?" Sabi nito na sinang-ayunan ng barkada niya.

I fake a smile as I heard slight mockery from her tone. 

"Hindi ako natuloy eh," Sabi ko at nilampasan na sila.

I sighed heavily. Napatigil ang mga paa ko sa tapat ng isang luma at maliit na building. Dalawa lang kasi ng palapag nito. It says 'Department of Arts and Science'. Nangangalawang na nga yung signage eh.

This is much worse than what I expect it to be.

"Kamusta ang first day 'nak?"

Agad akong nagmano kay Nanay na nakaupo sa harap ng makinang pantahi niya.

"Ayos naman po," Maikling sagot ko at nakita ko kung paano lumungkot ang mukha niya.

"Pasensya ka na... "

Umiling agad ako at niyakap siya mula sa likod. This is what I mean when I said I couldn't bear to see. I don't want them to feel sorry for not sending me to my dream school due to our financial incapacity.

"Nanay, napaka-drama. Ayos nga lang po!" Pagbibiro ko para maibsan ang bigat ng hangin sa paligid namin.

Ayoko sa lahat na ipinipilit ang hindi naman para sa akin. Ayoko na ipilit ang mga bagay na hindi nakatadhana.

'Cause if you defy fate, you'll end up hurting more and be too damn disappointed. I'd rather go with the flow so I can adjust and accept it easily. Cause what's meant to be will always happen no matter what and you can't do anything about it. Kahit anong effort mo, ang hindi para sa'yo ay hindi mapupunta sa'yo. Some say that it's a protection from the Almighty God above, some say it's bad of luck or for some because you're not deserving of it.

"Pasok muna kayo Engineer! Ikaw din Architect!"

Mabilis na pumunta ang mga mata ko sa gate namin. Kahit kailan talaga ay napakalakas ng boses ni Tatay. Lumikha ng ingay ang gate namin nung bumukas. Nakita ko na unang pumasok si Tatay kasunod ang dalawa pang lalaki na kaedad nito. I can conclude that the old men were the Engineer my father was calling earlier.