Her Light - His Darkness✔

Chapter 37

"What are you doing here?"

"Hey, Logan. How are you?" He responds, but my eyes remain focused on the other person that entered.

"Fine, you?" I answer rudely, unable to focus on the young officer that helped me.

"I'm great thanks, do you need a minute?" Dwayne asks, pointing between me and the person I can't seem to tear my eyes away from. The longer I stare the more freaked out and panicky I seem to feel.

"You could've warned me, given me a heads-up or something to mentally prepare myself for this."

"I'm sorry, Lo. I didn't know he was coming. He wanted to surprise me." And I feel guilty, it's her home and I convinced her to get back with him, I knew this was going to happen sooner or later... I just preferred the latter.

"Lo, it's been a while," he pauses, looking unsure before taking a cautious step forward, "I'm sorry for even considering giving La– him any help. It was never my intention to hurt you or anybody for that matter." Nathan's words are sincere, I can hear it, see the sincerity in his eyes. The eyes.... It's his eyes that are freaking me the fuck out, the similarity between his eyes and Landon's is uncanny, but I'll... I'll have to learn to live with it if I'm going to stick around and be part of Ava and Christian's lives, there's just one thing left that's bothering the shit out of me.

"If you didn't fall in love with Ava, how far would you have gone?"

He smiles adoringly at Ava, kissing her temple, her cheeks turning red, "I can't imagine not falling in love with her."

"Thar's great and I'm glad you're in love with my sister and all but you didn't really answer the question."

"But that's the thing, I wouldn't have gone further, I can't see myself not falling in love with her repeatedly. I was only supposed to get him info nothing else, I'd never lay a finger on Ava, Logan, or Gabby. I never would've hurt them if that's what you're asking." That's a satisfying answer, I can see Christian is satisfied with Nathan's response, he steps forward shaking Nathan's hand and pulling him in close, he says something to Nathan that only they can hear before returning to my side.

"Logan?" Officer Dwayne Young calls, grabbing my attention. I forgot he was here, shit.

"Yes? Sorry."

"Would now be a good time to take your statement? Yours and Christian's?" I look to Christian trying to gauge his reaction, but his lips lift into an encouraging smile, is he letting me decide? It's his choice too.

"I'm feeling quite beat, mind if we do it tomorrow?" Reliving everything I went through is not something I'm willing to do, not now or ever... I know I must go through all the details at some point but just... just not tonight, I'm not ready for it tonight...

"Sure, I'll see you tomorrow down by the station." I nod, smiling tightly. He says his goodbyes to each of us before leaving.

"I hope you guys don't mind but I invited Nate to join us for movie night." Ava announces when we hear the door close. 

It's funny how everyone's eyes in the room are focused solely on me awaiting my response or reaction. It's considerate of Ava to think about my feelings regarding her boyfriend but truth be told, I'm not going to stand in the way of her finding happiness. I just want what's best for her, for them. They deserve to be happy just as much as I do... I deserve to be happy...

For the first time in years, I actually believe I deserve true, unfiltered happiness, I'm allowed to smile without feeling an ounce of guilt, I'm allowed to laugh freely without wondering if my parents would hate me for moving on with my life but thinking about it now, I realize how ridiculous my thought process was and how warped my mind truly was.