Broken || Little Mix ||

Chapter 10

Five hours and six drinks later, I find myself on the dance floor with Perrie, grinding against two random hot guys. I'm well past the point of drunk and creeping into blackout territory. I feel the hands of the guy I'm dancing with, whose name is either Jason or Matthew, I can't really remember, as he grabs my ass, pulling me closer to him. I throw a glance over at Perrie and see that her guy is doing the same. Part of me is annoyed, knowing security would never let us go back to their places and with us being on the bus tonight there's no chance of getting any.

After a few more minutes of dancing, I decide I need another drink and break away from Jason/Matthew. I go over and grab Perrie's hand, trying to get her to come with me.

"She's busy," her guy shouts over the music.

"Yeah she's busy with me!" I shout back.

His face grows visibly annoyed as he holds Perrie's other hand.

"Who the hell are you?"

"I'm Jade, her girlfriend. Jerrie is real!" I drunkenly exclaim.

Perrie bursts out into drunken laughter at my exclamation. The guy looks back and forth between the two of us, both giggling and holding onto each other tightly, before deciding it isn't worth it and leaving to find some other poor girl.

"I have to use the bathroom!" Pez yells at me.

I nod, grabbing her hand and leading her towards to back of the VIP section towards the restroom. Even inside, the music is ear shattering and the omniscient lighting adds to my level of intoxication. The bathroom is empty and I step up to the mirror to look at my face. I took one of Clarke's pills before we left for tonight and I'm feeling pretty good right about now. My eyes are the only tell that I'm on something and not just plain drunk but I seem to be in better control of myself than the last time so I've gotten away with it thus far.

The girl looking back at me in the mirror makes me feel shame and disgust, so I look away, opting to wash my hands to keep busy. In the few quick seconds of analyzing my face, I could see all the little flaws. The indentations and spots hidden under makeup. My chapped lips. My racoon like eyes. I hate the way I look and I'm beginning to hate myself entirely.

"You okay Poopy?" Perrie asks as she comes out of the stall. Her glazed eyes look at me with concern and affection.

I give her a small smile and nod. "Yeah. Just miss him a bit is all."

I've decided to give the girls little snippets like this to keep them at bay. It seems to work as Pez dries her hands off and then gives me a tight hug.

"I know babes. It won't ever hurt any less but it'll get easier to handle as time goes on," she slurs.

The two of us stay wrapped in the embrace and sway for a bit before breaking apart and bursting into laughter.

"Let's go get shitfaced," I say grinning.

"I'm already shitfaced but okay."

I grab her hand and lead us out of the bathroom and back over to the bar and order two shots and two Malibu and Cokes. I hand one of the shots to Perrie and we clink glasses before downing the burning liquid. As a chaser, I chug down half of my other drink and lean against the bar as another wave of alcohol makes me dizzy.

"Woah there," Pez says while giggling. She grabs me by the arm and the two of us shakily make our way back to the circle booth that was reserved for our party. Claude and Aaron are taking swigs straight out of a bottle of Bacardi while Leigh-Anne plays with Jesy's hair. She's completely passed out and I thank the Gods because she seems to be the only one that's able to tell when I'm high anyways.

"When do you guys want to leave?" Claude shouts over the music.

"One more dance!" Leigh begs.

She jumps up and holds her hand out to me. Reluctantly, and extremely unbalanced, I get up from the booth and take her hand, going out onto the dance floor. The DJ notices this and puts on a remix of Joan of Arc. Leigh and I go crazy, shouting the words along to the track and putting on quite the show on the floor. By the time the song ends, I'm out of breath again but my adrenaline is pumping from the applause of those around us.

We make our way back to the group and Aaron, Claude and Perrie all jokingly bow down to us.

"Let's get out of here!" Aaron screams.

I grab my bag, down the rest of my drink and clutch onto Perrie's hand for stability and reassurance. Aaron and Claude manage to wake Jesy up enough to where they can each drape an arm over their shoulder and get her out of the club.

"I friggin' love you lot," she mumbles while smiling.

The bouncer holds the door open for us and I immediately shield my face from the cold wind that attacks me. Whether it's the weather or the fact that it's nearly four A.M., there's not a single photographer in sight. It's a relieving feeling to realize that.

"Jade, give us a hand here. I don't trust any of you three to phone a taxi right now," Claude says.

I let go of Perrie's hand as Jesy transitions to lean more on Aaron while I now hold her hand.

"Aw you're cold bubs!" Jes exclaims, seeing the chill bumps on my skin.

She completely let's go of Aaron, wrapping me in her arms and leaning all her weight onto me. In my normal state, I could handle this easily. She really is pretty light. Unfortunately, in my current state of intoxication, my balance is not where it usually is and I stumble back against her.

My heel catches something on the pavement and I quickly feel us falling.

"Fuck!" I shout as I slam into the ground.

My left elbow hits the sidewalk with a sharp crack and even through the haze of alcohol, pure agony registers on my brain. Tears jump to my eyes as Claude hangs up his phone and quickly comes to help Aaron get us off the ground.

"Oh shit!" Leigh says laughing. Her and Perrie are holding each other, pissing themselves as Jesy apologizes profusely.

"Are you okay?" Aaron asks.

I look down at my elbow which is already discolored, bleeding slightly and slightly deformed.

"Fuck. You call Paul. I'll call an ambulance," Aaron says to Claude.

"No! No, wait to call Paul and see what he says. Maybe they know a private doctor or medical center so it won't get to the press," I quickly scramble.

The scars on my arms are covered by only makeup and I know a hospital is not going to be as negotiable as a private doctor. Even while shitfaced at least I still seem to have some common sense. Aaron looks unsure but Claude is nodding.

"She's right bro. Lemme call Paul real quick."

Realizing that I'm actually hurt, Pez and Leigh rush over to me now, seeming to feel extremely guilty.

"I'm fine! Just get off me," I snap, struggling to get back on my feet.

All three of them continue to fuss over me as Claude seems to be having a tense conversation with Paul. Finally, he hangs up and walks back over to us.

"Two cars are on the way. Paul said you four are to get in the first one and get back to the bus. I'm to go with Jade and meet him at a private clinic," he explains.

"I'm staying with Jade," Perrie argues.

"Pez, Paul said-," Claude starts.

"I know what he said and I'm saying I don't care. I'm coming with her."

Claude just sighs but doesn't argue. He doesn't look very happy though when the cars pull up and Perrie climbs in after helping me inside.