Yogscast Stranded - A Yogscast Fanfiction

Chapter 25

This is some what irrelevant but kind of cool, but I just noticed that a song covered by Smith's old band (The Tin Box Boys) goes really well with this chapter. The lyrics kind of fit what's going on, and it has Smith's gorgeous voice in it <3. If you want to listen to it, search 'TTBB For The Widows In Paradise'

Smith's POV (Continuation of last chapter)

If I'm not strong enough to know the truth, I won't be strong enough to keep living on without knowing it. I have to go and find them. Even if it's just to say goodbye for the last time, I still have to go. I can't just let them leave my life without any final goodbye.

It's probably midnight right now, and everyone else is asleep. I silently stand, looking up at the velvet black sky. I want to do this alone.

I think back to when I found out about their deaths, when Turps told me. He said he saw their bodies... They must be near the place where I first found out about their deaths.

I slowly enter the jungle, feeling my way through the pitch black. Everything is silent except for the barely perceptible rustling of leaves as the wind gently parts them. I can't help but begin to tremble out of fear and anxiety; I know that seeing the bodies is going to emotionally break me. But I have to say goodbye. They had always been there for me throughout my whole life, now it's my turn to be there for them.

I come out into the clearing where the stream is, the trickling water suddenly seeming extremely loud in the silent atmosphere of the night.

I look around, my legs shaking as I try to figure out where their bodies could be. I eventually go with my gut instinct, and keep walking forwards, following the stream.

I suddenly catch the scent of burnt flesh, and know that I am going the right way. A sense of dread begins rising in my stomach, making me feel sick and dizzy. I stop to lean against a tree, closing my eyes and taking deep breaths. I have to do this. I can't back out now.

I steady myself and open my eyes, before continuing onwards. It doesn't take me more than I few steps before I see them.

My two best friends. Dead.

I look at the two faces which I know so well. Eyes closed, no movement.

Time freezes, yet a million thoughts rush through my head. I shut my eyes, unsteady on my feet.

This isn't happening. It's not real, none of it is true. It can't be... Can it?

I shake the thoughts from my head. I have to face this. Even if it breaks me.

My legs feel like lead as I force myself to approach the bodies.

It feels so unreal, so dreamlike, seeing them there. I wish that this was just a dream. But it isn't; it's the cold, cruel reality.

They would look almost normal if it wasn't for the burns and scorch marks littering their bodies, flawing their perfection.

I shakily kneel next to them, tears hazing my vision. I wipe them away quickly; I want to be able to see Chris and Ross properly.

"I don't know what I'm going to do without you guys..." I admit softly, "When I get back- if I get back- I don't know what I'll do. I'm sorry that I couldn't save you. You were always there for me, but I wasn't there for you when you most needed me. And I'm sorry for that, and I regret it so, so much."

I pause to let a few tears escape through my eyelashes and drip onto the hard dirt of the rainforest floor.

I give a weak, pathetic laugh, "You guys would laugh so hard if you could see me right now." I sigh, "We had some good times. I'm glad we spent so much time together, but I'll miss you more than I can put into words. I already do; I haven't been able to properly sleep since I found out what had happened to you. I wish all of this could have happened to me rather than you, but... There's nothing I can do anymore."

I let out a few sobs, but it doesn't do anything to ease the aching pain of losing the two people who you rely on the most in your life. I put one hand on the ground to steady myself, but then feel it come in contact with something plastic. I look down to see Ross' lighter on the ground. I pick it up and examine it carefully before putting it in my pocket.

I suddenly notice that the pale yellow light of dawn is now filtering through the leaves, scattering splashes of sunlight over Chris and Ross' faces, illuminating their still features. I have to get back before the others realise that I'm gone.

I gaze at the lifeless bodies of my best friends for the last time.

"I love you. I love both of you. I promise that I will never forget you as long as I live." I stuggle to keep talking, sobs threatening to escape my tight throat.

I get up slowly, an overwhelming sense of depression settling over me.

"Goodbye." I whisper, my voice scarcely audible.

I take one final look, the last time I will see them. Ever.

I wipe my eyes before turning away. Goodbye.

NOTE:

It's actually happened. I cried whilst writing a chapter. Well, I didn't properly cry, but my eyes did get very wet. Hopefully you guys aren't as emotionally traumatised as I am now xD

Thanks for reading!