Ablaze |Season 1|

Chapter 15

OCTAVIA

I CAN'T sleep.

I've been overthinking nonstop about that adorable girl named Ferish. She's clearly not fine and I heard that her parents aren't here to be with her. Sinong magbabantay sa kan'ya? Si McKinley? Where are they?

I can do that, but... what for? I mean, I was the one who told her that we're not friends before that incident. That, we should stop seeing each other because she's no good for me. Now, I don't get why I'm having this perplexity.

This is much worse frustrating than I expected. How can they hurt that innocent girl like it's nothing and like, she never matter at all, when she's literally the reason why I'm catching a glimpse of light from my own darkness? Matthew will definitely pay for what he has done to that girl. I cannot let it pass.

I don't know what should I do. I tried distancing myself, and this happened. Ni hindi ko nga alam kung dapat din ba akong magtiwala pa sa sarili ko dahil sa nangyari. She's too precious to get hurt by someone who's beyond a mess. I can't let that to happen. It hurts me, too. It will hurt me, too.

Bumangon na ako mula sa pagkakahiga sa kama at nagsuot ng robe. Nagpunta ako ng balcony para magpahingin at makahinga nang maluwag. I can see a great view from where I'm standing. The peaceful night triggered a feeling of being in someone else's absolute peace.

Naupo ako sa isang couch dito at nagdekwatro habang nakatingin sa madilim na langit. The night feels peaceful, while I'm at the vexations of my restless thoughts. I cannot comprehend how I feel. It's been confusing me in every way I know.

Is she going to be fine?

And the friendship she wants, can I really do it? Paano kung masaktan ko lang din siya? Paano kung hindi niya rin ako maintindihan tulad ng iba? Will the friendship work? Because, to be honest, I don't think that I can bear another pain if ever that this risk fireback to me.

"Why do you keep on confusing me, li'l girl..." I gently whispered while adoring the full moon, trying to savour the peace. The moonlight shows a majestic light that illuminates the path in the darkness. It knows the secrets of the night.

Napatingin ako sa hawak kong phone at nagpunta ulit sa gallery. Isa lang ang picture naming dalawa rito, at 'yon ay nung nasa bar pa ako. I didn't ask what she was doing there.

She has that adorable smile as if she knows no pain and misery, when it's all visible in her eyes. How can she hide all those pain like she was never shattered into pieces? I can see my reflection on her, as we are the same who have been through trauma and agony. The difference is that, she can control her emotions well.

"Ferish." I whispered her cruel yet lovely name while thinking. Even the sound of her name is enough to bring calmness into my raging system.

Ah, I found peace.

_____

"HOW IS she?" Bungad ko kay Tori nang makita siyang hinihintay ako sa may gilid lang ng library.

Nakasandal siya sa may pader at nakapamulsa. She's been texting someone on her phone while wearing her signature nonchalant expression that intimidates those who didn't know her. Students are greeting her but she's ignoring them. It's not that she doesn't care, it's just that, it drains her energy to interact with people.