The inner workings of my mind

Waves

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I'm spinning round in circles trying to breath

I fake a smile to make everyone around me feel ok

but i'm not okay

I can't determine the reasoning behind my sad emotion because it pushes me like an unexpected wave trying to reach the sand

My head falls under the water and I struggle for air alone

The people don't take notice of the water splashing frantically around me

Maybe that's because i'm not screaming to heavens that I can't swim or that it's to much for me to take

So I wait patiently for the waters to calm allowing me to resurface

And I manage to plaster a smile even after encountering it to assure everyone that i'm fine

But i'm not fine

Mainly because I don't know when the next wave will hit

Maybe because I don't know if I can come back up for air

Or maybe the only thing i'm concerned with is the repeated questions of those around me and I refuse to allow them see me hurt

I hurt alone not because I want to

Simply because I can't explain why I need help

I can't tell someone my emotions if I don't know what they mean myself

So as I spin in circles by the force of the waves a shark approaches me and amplifies my fear of continuing this cruel cycle

     ~ARRI~