The storm won't stop and it feels as though my beating heart refuses to continue any longer
It's official, I AM LOST
it's not because of the winds and icy rain that shoots down my face or the breeze that threatens to blow me away
No I can handle all of it, I can take the cuts and scrapes they leave behind and bandage myself up pretending as if nothing happened to begin with
Hell I wouldn't even care if the wind picked me up and sent me crashing to the ground breaking every bone on impact
As long as they keep my eyes ... so I can see you
If I could hold you and whispers sweet nothings in your ear and watch you sleep peacefully I would be okay
The pain in my chest hurts worse without you but at least with the storm I could prepare myself for it
What I can't do is allow you to walk away with what remains of me
My heart tells me to do whatever it takes but my stubborn ass mind tells me to let him go if he chooses
fuck him it says while the wind refuses to settle down long enough for me to think
that's all I need to do is think so just let me
Why won't my mind be empty enough for me to get a single thought or word out because that's not what I meant
Or at least it wasn't how I wanted to say it
What I meant was I wanted you to choose me
I'd take every memory and force it out of my brain if I could but let's be honest we both know that I can't
And yea I'm completely fucked up but you stayed by my side during the fires crashing down on everything that we built and told me it would be okay
You gave me your shoulder to cry on during my dark depressing days, seen me at my absolute worse and never judge me
so why is this storm more difficult for you to deal with
why is one request unable to be met
AND WHY THE FUCK CAN'T YOU JUST STAY AND FIGHT FOR ME
...That's not what I meant to say it's just my head spitting out words that I can't take back
what I meant was...I'm sorry
The storm is mine alone to deal with my demons alone to destroy and yet all of my strength comes from you
It shouldn't I know that already
I was fine fight storms and rebuilding barricades on my own, it was my normal but now that I watched you stay and slay my dragon claiming me as yours I realize it's not that I can't handle it...I just don't want to be alone anymore
~ ARRI~
YOU ARE READING
The inner workings of my mind
Poetrythis is where i decided to place my poems seeing as though i tend to write a lot of them...lol so i hope you guys enjoy
