Intentions | Jason McCann |

Chapter 32 - Repeating

| Savanna |

I decided to shower because I hadn't been able to properly shower in days. I had to be super careful of my leg so when I did shower, I always felt really self conscious on accidentally ripping it open or something. So, I took this as my chance to finally shower without tip toeing around it.

I went in to my bathroom where I piled my hair in to a top knot as I had just washed it last night and it didn't need washing again. I stripped off my clothes and sat at the edge of my bathtub, unwrapping the bandage the nurse had wrapped around my leg to protect it before I threw it away. I looked down at my thigh checking if it looked okay considering the nurse did say to keep a look at it. As I walked past the mirror, I caught a view of my sides that had fading dark bruises from when I was beaten by Andrea's men for not complying. I closed my eyes briefly, trying to get the thought of those men out of my head.

I sighed deeply, shaking my head before I stepped in to my shower letting the water completely soak me.

I don't know what came over me, I just cried, breaking down in tears as the water flowed over me. I couldn't figure out why I was crying, it just felt so good and it was almost out of my control. I cried in to my hands, I was imagining Andrea, her motive to kill, her desire to finish the job. I was thinking about how quickly my life had just changed, and how I should have been grateful that I made it out of there alive and not in a body bag.

It was kind of hard to be grateful when your entire world had been flipped upside down.

But my world had flipped already, before the kidnapping, my world had flipped for Jason. It sounded emotional and maybe even cringe, but it was the only thing I was sure off. I was almost forgetting the way Jason looked at me, it had been that long. It sounded like I was obsessed, I understood that, but it was unhealthy how much I wanted him here with me.

But maybe this is what unrequited love was? I understood unrequited meant one-sided, not fully understood by the beloved, but in my world, I felt as if I was loving too hard for somebody who didn't know how to love at all. Jason McCann in love, it almost didn't even sound like a real sentence. He had proven resistance, he had proven he had the capability to completely ignore his feelings in the name of his power, his power that he never wanted to lose. So, maybe that was exactly it. Unrequited love, not because my beloved didn't love me back, but because my beloved loved power more than he could love me, or even himself.

Beloved, he didn't even match the description.

I had stopped crying at this point, my tears had literally washed down the drain and I took this as my opportunity to actually shower rather than sob. I washed my body with a calming shower gel because that was all my crying ass needed. I exfoliated and shaved, missing the feeling of having a smooth body. I got out the shower and dried off, moisturising myself enough so that I was nice and smooth in the morning before I pulled on my undergarments. I had been sweating sweats or leggings to bed ever since I had my stitches put in because I was terrified I was going to rip out my stitches during the night because I do be sleeping wild sometimes.

I pulled on a pair of cycling shorts and a oversized sweatshirt. I dryer my hair with the towel and dried it briefly with a blow dryer, just enough for it to be less wet as I didn't want to fall asleep with dripping hair most likely waking up with a cold and a soaking pillow.

Finally, I left my room, heading down the stairs and to the kitchen where I placed my phone on the counter and I grabbed a bottle of water. I turned at the sound of my phone buzzing on the counter top, I flipped it to see it was Nances' Caller ID, I smiled at the picture I had set as her ID because it was us at the start of this year at one of the welcome week parties. That was probably the most I had ever partied, and most memories were made then.

"Hey girlie" I said with a smile.

After a few seconds of silence, I frowned, "Nance?" I asked, wondering if she accidentally butt dialled me or something.

"Sa-savanna," she paused, instantly I could hear the difference in her voice. She was a confident speaker, she was also the louder amongst our friendship group so her tone threw me off completely and I knew something was up.

"Nance? Are you okay?"

"No i- I'm good, I um- can you meet me?" I knew too much to know this was not right. I wasn't stupid, I could hear the fear in her voice and for some reason my mind flipped instantly to Andrea. I know it was a stretch but I just had this reflex, this urge that was pointing me in that direction and an instant wave of anger flushed through me.

"Nancy, tell whoever has that gun pointed at you to drop it and talk to me themselves." I said, anger in my voice.

The sound of rustling was heard before it stopped, "Wow Savanna, your dad sure did train you well" Andrea's voice my my heart fall to pit of my stomach, a wave of flashbacks hit me as I imagined her doing the same things she did to me, to Nancy.

"Why are you doing this Andrea, why Nancy?"

She chuckled, "You're a tricky girl to get a hold of right now Sav, I tried all other connections, you don't have a fella in your life which is surprising considering a whore is never short of men by their side..." she trailed off, probably waiting for a reaction.

"And then a little birdie pointed me in the direction of your Instagram page! Super helpful because not only did I figure out exactly why you got McCann's attention but, I found your best friends!" She exclaimed, joy in her voice. "But, luckily, only one of them was dumb enough to go partying on a Thursday evening... who even does that?"

"Stop trying to waste time, tell me where you are, I'm assuming that is exactly what you want."

"Oh sweetie, you think I'm that stupid? I give you the location of where I'm keeping your precious bestie, you tell one of those 10 guards you have guarding your house who then go and alert the entire fuckin clan... no no no, that just can't do" She sounded so amused, like she had accomplished something.

"So what do you want me to do?" I asked.

"Don't worry Sav, I got you a ride, happy travels" With that, the call ended. As soon as it did, my eyes darted to the back yard sliding doors where I saw movement. I walked closer to see 3 men stood out in my backyard, my eyes widening as they each waved at me, like this was the purge or something.

I looked back at the exit to the kitchen, thinking of the chance I had of alerting somebody. But, my best friend's life was on the line here, if I did something stupid, if I made Andrea mad, she wouldn't hesitate to hurt her, or worse.

I had put Nancy in this position, I had to get her out of it.

I took a deep breath, opening the sliding doors before closing them quickly before the alarm sounded. The men looked at me with amusement before one approached me, "I'll take that, thank you" He said, pulling my phone out of my hand.

"If you scream, we'll kill you, if you try anything, we'll kill her." He threatened, referring to Nancy. I simply nodded, complying to whatever they wanted. I watched as they nodded at one another before he turned around, he pulled out his gun and within seconds he hit the end of the barrel on to my temple and it took not even a second for everything around me to go black.

Just like the first time.