Lost and Found

17: I don't need your help

"I'm really starting to worry about Peter." Susan sighed as she walked along beside her sister, watching Peter walking ahead, calling Edmund's name every few seconds.

Lucy nodded and bit her lip. "Me too." She mumbled. "And it's his birthday as well."

Susan swallowed hard. "I wish he'd at least let us give him his presents." She sighed. "I brought mine along with me, just in case we were searching this long."

"I've got his present from me too." Lucy mumbled. "But he doesn't even want to hear a word about them."

"Let's just hope we find Edmund soon." Susan sighed sadly. "Otherwise it's gonna break him."

Lucy nodded slowly before swallowing hard. "I really miss him." She whispered, tears filling her eyes.

Susan sighed sadly, placing a hand gently on her sisters shoulder. "Oh Lu." She murmered. "I do too, but I promise you we will find him."

"I know we will." Lucy mumbled. "But I just wish we could find him now. Actually, I wish we'd never lost him in the first place."

"Me too Lucy." Susan said slowly. "But we did. But we're going to get him back... no matter how long it takes."

Lucy forced a small smile and slowly nodded her head.

Susan smiled back before taking a deep breath. "I'm going to go and talk to Peter okay?" She said quietly. "You stay here."

Lucy only nodded before Susan ran off ahead, slowing when she reached Peter and walking beside him.

"What do you want?" Peter muttered, sounding a little annoyed. "Because if you've come to discuss my birthday than don't even bother."

Susan sighed. "It's just-"

"Susan." Peter cut her off. "I mean it."

Susan frowned deeply. "Why are you so set against even mentioning your birthday?" She asked, keeping her voice quiet so not every heard her. "Peter, you only turn 20 once. I understand you not wanting to celebrate, I wouldn't want to either, but you could at least let us wish you a happy birthday and give you your presents without shouting at us everytime we try."

Peter swallowed hard, looking angry and worried both at the same time. "I'm kind of concentrated on finding my brother right now." He said through gritted teeth.

"We know that Peter!" Susan choked. "And we miss him too. But you're always searching, if you had it your way you wouldn't stop Peter! You are not going to be any help to Edmund if you end up collapsing from exhaustion are you?"

Peter took a deep breath. "I know." He muttered. "But I dont need the distraction of my birthday right now."

"Do you reckon Edmund would want you acting like this?" Susan said, crossing her arms. "He'd atleast want you to acknowledge that it's your birthday."

"I have acknowledged it." Peter said with a nod. "And I'm ignoring it, now please just shut up, or I'll send you home."

Susan blinked at him, slightly shocked at his choice in words. But Susan knew he was scared, scared and frustrated, and she knew those two emotions weren't a good mix for her brother at all.

She fell silent after this and just wondered along beside Peter, head down as she did. She hardly had the courage to suggest stopping for lunch, but after a quick glance around at everyone, and after noticing they all looked pretty tired, she finally brought it up to Peter.

Peter stopped walking and turned to face her. "What?" He snapped.

"I just think we're all getting pretty tired." Susan said hesitantly. "And it would be good to stop for an hour and have some lunch."

Peter all but glared at her before turning away. "Well I'm not tired so I'm continuing." He said as he began to walk. "But by all means, stay here whilst our brother gets tortured."

Susan swallowed hard, the sentence hitting deep and causing tears to spring to her eyes. "You arent gonna find him if you're too exhausted Peter, I was just trying to help you." She whispered.

"Yeah well don't bother." Peter snapped. "I don't need your help, I can find him by myself."

Susan sighed. "Peter please stop." She called, running after him and grabbing his shoulder.

But Peter easily shook her off. "Get off of me." He all but growled out.

"Peter you're exhausted!" Susan choked. "I can tell just by looking at your eyes! If you work yourself to the point or collapse, then you'll be too ill to search for him."

"I could be on the brink of death and still searching for him." Peter said fiercely, still walking through the woods, and by now the two were a fair distance away from everyone else who'd stopped for lunch.

"Would you stop being so stupid Peter." Susan snapped. "One hour is not going to hurt!"

"It might not hurt me!" Peter said, raising his voice. "But it might very well hurt Edmund!"

Susan sighed, realising that she wasn't going to get through to Peter anytime soon. "Fine." She whispered, lowering her gaze to the floor as she took a deep, shaky breath. "Go, go and search for him, but dont come crying to me when you faint from exhaustion."

"Shut up!" Peter suddenly exploded, eyes filling with tears and his face morphing into a scowl. "Just shut up Susan! I am going to find my brother if it's the last thing I ever do! Even if I have to crawl there! Even if I'm on the brink of death! No matter what I am going to find him. Nothing matters until I do, I cannot live without him and I refuse to until he is back, so you can just shut up, because I'm not going to listen!" And with that he marched off through the woods, leaving Susan staring, shocked, after him.

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