Breaking Down

Chapter 26:

Cam drove his truck down the dark roads in silence as I sang to the songs on the radio. I would catch him staring at me out of the corner of his eye when I would choose to sing the harmonies instead of with the melody.

"Eyes on the road, Nash."  I said when he accidentally ran a stop sign.  The other car at the intersection honked its horn angrily at him.  To be fair, the sign was hiding behind a tree limb and was extremely hard to see.

"Yikes, I haven't done that before."  He said, embarrassed. 

"You are a horrible driver."  I teased.

"Well, if you didn't look so pretty tonight, then maybe I could concentrate on the road more." He flashed me a sheepish grin.

"I'll have to remember to make only ugly faces when you drive." I started making the worst possible faces I could at him and made a new weird noise with every single one.

"That's not helping."  He chuckled with his eyes glued to the road.

"I'm still distracting you even when I'm ugly?" 

"You couldn't be ugly if you tried, darling."  He said, tapping his fingers against the steering wheel victoriously.

I didn't have a comeback. Once again, Cam left me speechless the rest of the car ride.

A few minutes later, Cam pulled up to a little bar. My eyes widened in surprise when I saw where we were. This wasn't exactly what I was expecting. Cam was almost a year older than me and probably didn't even factor in my age when he asked me to come out with him. I would have to embarrass myself by reminding him I was too young.

"They won't let me in.  I'm not twenty-one yet."  I said, sighing. 

"It's eighteen and over tonight. Besides, you aren't drinking. No need to worry."  He placed his hand on my thigh and lightly traced his fingers up and down it. He squeezed softly near my knee, causing the fire to spread throughout my body.

When we got out of the car, Cam took my hand and led me into the bar.  I wrapped my other hand around his arm to keep close to him as he led me through the crowd. It was a little larger than I had initially thought and it wasn't what I expected at all.  It had some pool tables in the corner, but the most intriguing thing were the couples twirling around on the dance floor.

"Nash, you made it!" A guy with sandy brown hair walked up and fist-bumped him. "I didn't think you were going to show. Wait a minute, did you bring a girl? Holy shit.  Nash has a date!"

Cameron squeezed my hand tighter as I began fidgeting next to him nervously.  Maybe this was a bad idea.  It was a little too much for me; it was too soon for me to be surrounded by this many people.  I could feel the anxiety building in the pit of my stomach.

"Hey, I'm Ron.  I'm Cam's partner. Come on over and I'll introduce you to the crew."  Ron grabbed my free hand and ripped me away from Cam. He dragged me over to a booth full of people I had never met before.

"Hey everyone, meet my new girl.  What's your name?" He looked back at me.

"Jessa." I swallowed as five sets of eyes turned to stare at me at once.

"This is Jessa, my new love. I'm going to marry this gorgeous girl."  Ron wrapped his arm over my shoulder and pulled me into him.  He was obviously a little on the gone side. He was really sweet, though. 

I felt Cam right behind me.  I was glad he caught up to us to run interference.  I didn't get creep vibe off of Ron; he was just a fun-loving goofball. I was more nervous about meeting new people. I hated to admit it, but I felt more secure in myself having Cam near me.

"Hey, Nash."  A brunette bombshell with deep chestnut eyes called over to him. My heart dropped to my feet when I saw her eyeing him like he was a snack.  She was well dressed in a red sweater dress that hugged her toned figure. I could tell she was a cop, too, by the way she carried herself.  She had an air of authority and confidence that I could only dream of having.

I was slowly introduced one by one to the rest of the group.  The brunette's name was Kelly, and she worked down at the police dispatch center.  There was also Julian and his fiancé Patrice who were busy chugging beers. Lastly, there was Felix and his very pregnant girlfriend, Alexis, who were canoodling in the corner of the booth.  She looked absolutely radiant as she held on to her big bump. 

"What will it be?" Ron asked when he saw me turn my eyes to the drinks on the table longingly. 

"Water." Cam leaned in and answered for me. 

"Come on, Nash, let the girl have some fun."  Ron said, slapping his back hard.

"No, really, water is good.  I'm driving."  I said, taking Cam's keys out of his hand. I was shaking badly; I wanted the alcohol.  My body craved it.

Ron walked away and returned five minutes later with a glass of water for me and a beer for Cam.  Before I knew it, Ron had pulled me down in the booth next to him and wrapped his arm around me. Cam sat down next to Kelly on the other side. She leaned into him a little too much for my liking. One of her big red boobs was resting on top of his hand.  She was doing it on purpose to draw his attention. She wanted Cameron; any idiot could see how thirsty she was. 

"How do you know Nash?" Kelly was sizing me up with her eyes. She moved her arm to the back of the booth and leaned into Cameron as close as she could get without actually touching him. She gave me a triumphant smile when Cameron didn't pull away from her.

She needed to back off of him before I let bad Jessa out for the evening.  Bad Jessa would be slamming this girl's head against the table for that look.  Instead, I was stuck with the good Jessa, who just sat back and took it like a coward.

"We're just friends. We went to school together. We have been friends for a long time." Cam said, sipping his beer. He hadn't looked at me once since we sat down at the table. 

We were just friends, that was true.  Still, my heart hurt hearing those words come out of his mouth.  It sounded so impersonal. Friends, friends, just friends. The word sounded wrong in my head. I really wanted to go get a drink and forget about all of these confusing emotions.  I was starting to feel all over the place.

"Well, since you are 'just friends', you won't mind if I take her out for a spin around the dance floor." Ron smiled at Cam eagerly.

I looked back to Cam, now was his chance to man up.  Cameron could tell him no. I wanted him to tell Ron that he would be the only one dancing with me tonight. If he said no to Ron, then it meant he might be feeling the same way I was. It would mean he was starting to realize there was something more between us.

"As long as Jessa is fine with it." Cam said, chugging his beer.  He signaled to the waitress for another drink as she passed.

I had to fight to hold back the hurt. The sick delusions in my head really had convinced me that he might be interested in a girl like me. I was a psychotic freak, a worthless waste of space.  I was less than nothing.

I wasn't good enough for Cameron Nash and I never would be.