Darkness and Light - Snape's Daughter

Chapter 31

Lucy's POV

"I want everyone to picture the thing they fear the very most." Lupin spoke as we all began to line up in front of the cabinet. We were all about to face a Boggart who are shapeshifters that take on the form of what a particular person was scared of. We were supposed to turn it into something funny using the Boggart-banishing spell Riddikulus.

First up was Ron. Once Lupin opened the cabinet out sprung a massive spider. Ron hesitated for a second, but eventually managed to say the spell and suddenly each one of the spiders legs was wearing roller-skates and the room erupted into laughter.

I was up next, nervous but also curious about what my boggart would be. But once Ron's spider had fully turned into what feared me the most, I regretted every bit of curiosity I had beforehand.

"It's only a boggart, it can't hurt you." Lupin reassured, but I was already terrified. It was my foster father.

I couldn't breathe, he was towering over me like he usually would. I wanted to make him go away so bad, but all that fear inside of me caused me to just stand there frozen. All the memories of his abuse came flooding in. When he used to insult me and beat me. When he was drunk out of his mind early in the morning and would throw things at me. How he would break my things and then give me a beating for it later when he was hungover and forgot about his drunk actions.

"You worthless little bitch." He hissed like he usually would. I was clasping my wand in my hand, but just could not move.

"You are so weak, you will never amend to anything." Was he right? I mean, I know this is just a depiction of my fear, however I do know that this is something he would definitely say and I guess it holds some truth to it. I am weak, I can't perform a simple task like banishing a boggart. I keep getting hurt and becoming a burden to Severus.

"Come on Lucy, you can do it." I heard a familiar soft voice speak behind me. It was Jennie. "I believe in you, you can do it."

I think I must have started hyperventilating at this point because my vision was getting blurry. Jennie was counting on me though and I definitely don't want to look like a fool in front of everyone by my inability to make a boggart turn into something funny.

I snapped out of my fear for just a second and uttered "Riddikulus." My breathing was still unsteady and I assumed a few tears were forming in my eyes because I could barely tell what my foster father had turned into. It must have looked funny though, considering everyone behind me was laughing.

"Hey, are you alright?" It was my professors voice I heard this time. I turned to face the direction I heard him speaking from.

"How about you go take a little break, alright?" He spoke calmly. He sounded a little concerned too.

"Alright everyone, I will be right back and then we will continue." He announced a bit louder this time and led me out of the classroom.

I was fully able to move again so I wiped my tears away on my robe and looked up to face my worried looking Professor.

"Now you don't need to tell me anything if you aren't comfortable, but who is this man and is he still in your life?" Lupin asked.

I shook my head "He is not." I answered, ignoring his first question.

"That is good to hear, but judging by your reaction he must have left a profoundly negative impact on your mind." He paused for a second. "Do you want to go back inside or would you like me to take you to your fathers office maybe? He is not teaching at the moment I believe."

"The second option." I said, barely above a whisper.

Lupin silently led me down to the dungeons and knocked on Severus door. The whole way from the classroom to my fathers office I could not get his words out of my head. Maybe I was 'worthless' and 'weak'. I felt new tears beginning to form in my eyes but I suppressed the urge to cry as much as I could. It was only supposed to be a stupid class exercise but it completely crushed me. I had hoped to never see that mans face again but today I did and it brought up that anxiety ridden little girl inside of me that I had so hoped to have left behind when I fled out of this abusive household.

Severus opened the door and his face looked like a mix between confused and annoyed. "What is it Lupin, don't tell me Lucy is causing you any trouble." He looked down at me, but I guess he must have seen I was on the verge of tears so his annoyed expression completely faded.

"As you might know we were having students facing their bogarts today. For Lucy it seemed to be a man whom I do not know who he is, but only that he has definitely upset her quite a bit. I thought it was best to bring her down here to you." Lupin explained.

"Alright." Was all that Severus said, taking a step forward and guiding me towards him. I finally let my tears flow and practically fell into his robes. I heard him shut the door and then crouched down to face me.

"Lucy I promise you that man will never hurt you again, I will forever love and protect you do you hear me?" Severus looked sad, I knew he immediately was aware that my boggart was my foster father. I had told him about some of the things he used to say to me in the past.

I threw myself into his embrace again. It felt so warm and comforting. He gently rubbed my back, whispering that everything is going to be okay.