The Family Plan- A Malec AU Fanfiction

Walls of Yesterday

The Family Plan Chapter Ten : Walls of Yesterday

Alec Pov

"Alec... are you feeling okay," Maia asked hesitantly from behind me. We were in the kitchen kneading dough for tomorrow's batch of bread.

"I'm feeling just Peachey, why do you ask," I grumbled, not bothering to look up at her as I pushed on the dough.

"Well you have been kneading the same glob of dough for the past ten minutes and It's far from overworked. You only aggressively knead when something is bothering you. Are you fighting with Magnus or something?"

"Magnus and I aren't fighting. We are perfectly fine," I hissed, slamming my hands down hard on the globby mush on the table.

"Okay, well I am seeing many signs that say otherwise. Do you... knead to talk about it?"

I rolled my eyes finally turning to face her. "Really? A baking pun?"

She shrugged. "They get Lily to laugh. Thought I would try it. Nevermind that, tell me what's eating at you."

I sighed, finally taking my hands off the beaten dough and moving over to the sink to wash them. "Magnus and I aren't fighting... we're just arguing."

"Sounds like the same thing to me, but go on."

I finished washing my hands before turning off the water and leaning against the sink frowning. "He isn't being the dad I hoped he would be. I know he was hesitant about adopting at all, but when he saw Max, there was an instant connection there. All his fear melted away and he was ready to take him in. At least, that's what I thought. Ever since the boys got here, Magnus has been retreating to a place where I can't reach him. I keep begging him to talk to me about it but he refuses."

"Alec, Magnus isn't going to get over his hesitance on being a father overnight. It's going to take some time."

"We don't have time, Maia. Rafael needs stable parents who won't leave him now. He needs that right now and Magnus keeps running away. Rafael had a panic attack the other night and Magnus wasn't there to help me settle him down."

Maia thought about it for a moment before sighing. "It sounds pretty bad, but there has to be a reason for it. Magnus never does things without a reason."

"Well if there is a reason, he refuses to tell me. I used to think that secrets were never a thing between us. That we knew everything there is to know about each other. Now it feels like I never knew him at all. He is pulling away from me and I hate that most of all."

What's worse? I feel completely selfish for focusing on these petty things. Rafael and Max need stability. They need someone to hold them close and make them feel safe. Rafael himself is going through so much right now with the learning disability and school. That's what my focus should be on right now, not my crumbling relationship with Magnus.

"I'm the worst father ever," I sighed, walking over to the counter and leaning against it, putting my face in my hands.

"Whoa, you did not just say that," Maia scoffed, walking over to stand next to me. "Alec, you are a good ass dad. Why would you ever think otherwise?"

"I'm putting my drama with Magnus before my kids. A parent shouldn't do that."

"That's bullshit," Lily cut in, walking into the kitchen.

"Were you eavesdropping again," I sighed, rubbing my temples. She ignored me, standing in front of the counter and slamming her hands down on it to get my attention.

"Alec, take it from someone who came from a divorced household. Children know when things aren't okay between their parents. Sure, you shouldn't fight and scream in front of your kids, but you also shouldn't fake being okay. That just makes the kids feel like they're to blame once the parents finally fall apart."