𝟓𝐬𝐨𝐬 𝐁𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐕𝐨𝐥.𝟏

Rose-Colored Glasses: 4; Epilogue (A Harry Styles Sugar Daddy Fic)

Summary: (Y/N) is a 21-year-old student at the New York Institute of Fine Arts. When money becomes tight, she signs up to Seeking Arrangement, where she meets Harry Styles, a 30-year-old executive, who just wants a normal friend. Or, maybe more... 
(Words: 1.3k) (Part 1: New York, Part 2: New York, and Aspen, Part 3: New York, Amalfi Coast, and Rome) 

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(3rd Person POV)
Time seemed to pass more slowly than ever. For weeks on end now, his days have merged into one enormous mess.
His fingers fiddle with the pen in his hand. He cannot remember the last time he let it down; it is her gift, the only thing that's left of her. And now the ink is running out. He knows that such an expensive pen must have refills, but he doesn't want to change a single thing about the Italian, silver pen with his initials on the carved clip. He wants to keep it as is, to remind him of the woman who gifted it to him.

He runs his fingers over the scruff on his face, reclining back to his chair. He doesn't remember when he had his last shaving, his last proper bath, his last 8-hour sleep. It was summer when he last saw her, and now leaves have turned orange. The last time he saw her was in that Inn in Rome, the night he treated her like she was trash, and then she left. She left without telling anyone anything, even leaving her luggage in their original hotel room. He tried to, he really did try to move on. He looked for other women, went on a few meetings with girls he talked to on Seeking Arrangement, but no one came close to her.
The first time he met (Y/N), he felt peaceful, like he wasn't forcing himself to see her. And his latest meetings with women could only be described as agonizing. He gave up after a while, started looking for her. He had Vinny stalk her apartment until he saw her.
The driver had clear instructions to not leave her street for even a minute, but when (Y/N) saw him on Day 3 -the first time she left her apartment- she called the police. Harry searched for her on the site but stumbled upon the fact she had deactivated her account. He even made someone else on the site look her up, hoping she had just blocked him, but his friend had the same fate.
He mustered enough courage to go to her place himself, however, he found the apartment occupied by a new tenant who had no idea who (Y/N) was or when she left. His very last hope of finding her himself was his friend Paul; as her employer, he had to know where she was living. His effort was futile, his friend only informed him that she never actually started working for him and that the last he heard of her was when he received an email, thanking him for the opportunity but declining it.
Harry then asked him when that happened, finding out it was the very night she left him.
And now he is waiting for the Private Investigator to walk into his office with the latest news of his investigation. He told him to look everywhere for her, that he would pay triple his rate if he told him precisely where (Y/N) is.

(Y/N) is mindlessly narrating the history of the exhibit to the group of middle school students walking behind her; she has learned the paragraphs by heart at this point, it is part of her routine now. The students seem way less interested than the man who lurks in the background, waiting for the tour to be over already so he can have a chance to talk to her already.
His heart has been beating out of his chest the closer they get to the ending of the tour. He listens to her talk, letting her voice fill his ears after nearly 3 months of radio silence. (Y/N) greets off the students who scatter outside the museum.
She doesn't blame them for not showing the same interest she did their age. This is the only museum in close proximity to their schools, so they have probably been here a hundred times already.
She walks to the front desk, checking the list of reservations. On a weekday, she knows not to expect too many guests.
"Excuse me." She hears someone trying to get her attention. She raises her head, finding Harry looking at her. She just stares at him in shock, noticing how rough he looks. She doesn't pity him, not a bit; she was in a far worse state than he could ever be.
"Can we talk?" He asks her.
"What do you want?" She asks him back. She is looking around for her supervisors, making sure they are not around here. "I have been looking for you. I just want to talk with you." He states, feeling his lugs collapsing as he tries to catch his breath. This is far more anxiety-provoking than he thought it would be. "I am working here."
"Can you take a lunch break? I'd like to take you somewhere for a bite."
"No. I've already taken my break. And I don't want to be alone with you. I don't even want to see you. You have to leave." She is looking away from him, trying to avoid his hurt gaze. He sighs and sniffles, digging his nails into his palms.
"I am trying. I am really trying, (Y/N). Can't you see that? Can't you see that I am sorry?" He asks her, his voice breaking as a sense of righteousness takes over him, clogging his throat.
"What are you sorry for? You were absolutely right. I am nothing. You can buy anyone you want to take my place. Go buy yourself a new toy and leave me alone. I am nothing to you. You said that, and you were right. I was nothing, I was nothing when I was with you. So, fuck out of here and try to find someone else to bother and mistreat. You don't own me. Leave." She raises her voice, making Harry look at her in shock.
"No, no... I was wrong, I was stupid. You are everything. Please, (Y/N). I miss you. I miss who I was when I was with you. Please, let me make things right. I am miserable from the day you left me. I have tried to find someone else to fill the void but no one is like you, no one is making me feel as good as you made me feel." He begs her, almost pleading at her feet, but (Y/N) shakes her head.
"Please... This is just the Rose-Colored Glasses phenomenon. You think things were better, but once you sober down from the delusion, you will feel better, you will see you are wrong. Go home, Harry. Go back to New York. You will feel better in a few weeks."
"(Y/N)..."
"Leave, Harry." She says stubbornly. 

Harry hesitates for a second before he lowers his head and sighs. His heart is to his knees, feeling like he is going to fall on the floor any second now. Despite that, he leaves the premises without turning to look at her; he knows if he does so, he is going to lose all dignity and beg for her to be his again.
(Y/N) watches him as he leaves, but only for a couple of seconds to make sure he is gone for good. Out of sight, out of mind, out of life. Right now she feels more powerful than ever before. Sure, life is hard without Harry, and leaving New York was difficult, and felt like she was sacrificing too much to get away from him, but right now she feels as if she gained back her self-respect. She will manage just fine without him like she did all these years before meeting him. She picks up the list of people visiting for a tour today, crossing off Williamsburg Middle School.