𝟓𝐬𝐨𝐬 𝐁𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐕𝐨𝐥.𝟏

True positive (Ashton Irwin Fluff)

Summary: Ashton finally finds out why (Y/N) has been distant lately.
Based on General Prompt #12: "You just kissed me." (TW: Reader suffers from anxiety)
(Request: FunnyFangirl95) (Words: 1.5k)
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"I freaking knew I would find you here..." I hear Ashton's voice from behind me. I turn my head to bring him into my view, smiling at him softly.
"Heads up for the next time, don't startle someone leaning against the railing  of a balcony." I comment as he walks next to me, resting against the railing as well. He clings his beer bottle against mine, chuckling at my remark.
"You weren't that startled..." He mumbles, bringing his bottle to his lips to take a sip. I sigh, shaking my head and sipping on my drink slowly.
"How did you know I would be here?" I ask, turning to look at him. The light is very dim, only one bulb providing some kind of lighting, but I can see him smile widely, making his apples pop and dimples make their appearance on his face.
"Are you kidding me? We are having a concert in a club that has the best view of the city... Plus, the place is crumbed and you are a freaking introvert, so the rooftop was the obvious hiding spot." He replies, his voice calm and soothing.
"Yeah, I started kinda freaking out. But I loved the show. You guys were great and I love that you are doing this for a good cause. So I could not miss it for the whole world, even if I was forced to." I reply, leaving the bottle on the wooden railing.
"I know, I know... And I love that you came even when you knew it would be cramped. On the next show, I'll put you backstage to watch the show from the sides." He offers, placing a hand on my shoulder reassuringly.
"That would actually be amazing." I mutter and he nods.
"Thank you for being here. I know it is hard for you." He pulls me in for a hug, placing a hand behind my head.
"It is not hard for me to support my best friend in taking over the world." I giggle.

"Don't you have to be downstairs, talking with people and promoting your band?" I ask Ashton who shrugs his shoulder and smiles.
"I would like to stay here and enjoy the view. If you don't mind." He offers, pointing to the skyline.
"I know you are doing this out of pity. And you don't have to. I will be fine here. Go have fun." I assure him, turning away from him.
"Well, that's where you are wrong, pretty girl..." He chuckles, moving to sit down on the floor of the rooftop.
"It's dirty down there." I point out his pristine outfit, which he shrugs off.
"Come sit with me and stop worrying..." He says with a giggle, patting the spot next to him. I take a breath and kneel down before I sit down with my legs crossed and look up at the stars in the night sky.
"I love what you are doing with the Friends of Friends thing. I love seeing this side of you." I say, trying to break the silence.
"We had to do something. Horrible things happen every day and we wanted to help because we can. But enough about me. I want to talk about you. You barely ever talk." He says, sitting differently so he can look at me.
"Comes with the anxiety. I am scared I will tell the wrong thing, irritate the wrong people. So, I just stay quiet. Plus, I am more of a listener anyway." I reply, shrugging my left shoulder.
"Yeah, I get that. But it's not that. You are totally bullshitting me right now." He asserts, squinting his eyes at me. I knit my eyebrows together, looking at him confused.
"Except it is totally the truth." I defend myself and he shakes his head.
"6 weeks ago you were fine with me. You were talking to me, opening up, making fun, and being chill around me. And then you stopped, and you definitely shut down only me. Because you are still talking the same to every common friend of ours. So, please tell me if I was the one who said something stupid and screwed this up. Because I want to make it up and I need your help to do so." He explains, sounding truly worried.
"Ash... You did nothing wrong." I try to comfort him, moving closer to him.
"It sure feels like I did. Please tell me." He almost begs me to speak up.
"Ashton, I am telling you that you did nothing wrong. It's just a bad phase of my anxiety."
"And this phase tells you to specifically shut me out of your life and keep everyone else?" He asks me, tone changing into an interrogating one.
"I had to. It was and still is the hardest thing I had to do, and the last I wanted. But I had to." I groan, looking away.
"Had to? Why? Why did you have to shut me out?" He asks, totally confused.

"If I tell you, it will only make things worse." I explain, standing up from the floor and wiping the back of my dress to dust it off. Ashton stands up as well, moving in front of me.
"Where are you going?" He asks me with a sigh escaping his lips.
"I am cold, I should head back in." I point to the door, crossing my arms in front of my chest and rubbing my skin to make my lie more convincing.
He shakes his head, taking off his jacket and placing it over my shoulders. I bite my lip as I get engulfed by his scent, trying to keep my sanity.
"Now, please tell me. And I promise I swear that it will not make things worse." He is calmer now, looking at me softly as he looks for an answer.
"I am getting attached. I was getting close to you and I started feeling... things you should feel about a friend. And I know that false attachment happens to people with anxiety when they find the person they can open up to. And I didn't want that, I didn't want to put you through that. So, I had to step back, see if this is really a false positive, that it was just in my head that... that I am not falling in love with you." I scratch my head as I admit it, closing my eyes as I wait for Ashton to react.
"And?" He asks like he is waiting for the next part of a story.
"And what?" I cry out.
"What did you decide? Are you in love with me?" He asks me.
"What do you think, you idiot? You made me fall in love with you, and now I stand no chance. So, I am so sorry that it is not the same. But it is not easy for me." I exasperate.
"What do you mean you stand no chance?" He asks me, sounding slightly insulted.
"Are you kidding me? You are you... You have millions drooling over you, and you would settle for me? I have no chance." I shrug my shoulders, looking at him, longing for an answer. 

He pulls the edges of the jacket bringing me close to his body as his hand moves behind me, resting on the small of my back before he closes the gap and brings his lips to mine.
I gasp, tensing up in the first seconds of the kiss. But the more I taste him, the more I relax and melt in his arms, kissing him back as I feel goosebumps erupt on my skin. My hands move to his neck, resting on his collarbone as I stand on my toes to be close to him.
The kiss is slow and gentle and makes me feel butterflies inside me. So I never plan on pulling away, all I want is to taste him until I am out of breath.

However, we both need to breathe at a point, so we pull away, but stay in each other's arms, holding and feeling one another.
"You just kissed me." I whisper as Ashton presses his forehead on mine.
"I did." He replies.
"Why?" I ask, but at this point, I can feel the answer in my gut.
"Because being away from you was the hardest thing I had to do. Never make me go through that again. I am in love with you." He admits, making me chuckle.
"And you are sure this is not a false positive?" I joke, earning a peck on my nose.
"I am sure." He brings his hand to stroke my face.
"So, what are we going to do now?" I ask him, looking at him softly.
"I would like to kiss you again." He says and I nod.
"You should..." I whisper.
"And after that, I would like to take you on a date. Anywhere you want." He tilts my chin up, making me smile.
"You should do that as well." I lean in, bringing my lips to his and tasting him once more.