Lover| IT

The truth

R.T

Screw drowning in your own thoughts and sorrows. Who needs to do that when you can drown them in alcohol? Okay. I'm drunk. So sue me, I need some confidence to tell Connor about my escapade with Eddie. It's been a week since it happened and I have been meaning to tell Connor everytime I see him, but when I do see him, I feel a little ball of dread in the pit of my stomach and I chicken out. Hence the alcohol.

"Hey Rich." Connor greets as I stand outside of his and Stans dorm." Stanley's at Patty's-

"I came here to see you. I have something to tell you." I admit. Connor smiles and lets me in. I sit down on the couch and he remains standing.

"So...what is it?" He asks, crossing his arms. Oh god I feel sick. This alcohol isn't working. I need another drink.

"Um...do you have any alcohol?" I ask and Connor nods. He goes to the fridge and makes me a vodka and coke. He knows me so well already. He hands it to me and I finish it in one gulp.

"Fucking hell, Richie." Connor chuckles. I already feel slightly calmer. I have to tell him. Now." So, what did you Wanna talk about?"

"IsleptwithEddieonHalloweenandIwantedittohappenandilovehimandiamsososorry!" I blurt out and Connor stares at me.

"What? I did not understand a word of that." He chuckles. I wish he'd stop laughing. It's making me feel worse.

"I slept with Eddie." I sigh, taking my glasses off and rubbing my eyes. I slip them back on and look at Connor. His eyebrows are furrowed." On Halloween. I wanted it to happen and I am so so sorry."

"Oh." Is all he says. I want him to yell at me. I deserve it. I want him to be angry.

"You aren't angry?" I ask.

"I...don't know." He replies and his eyes are filling with tears. Oh god. I don't want him to cry. He can yell at me, punch me, just don't cry.

"Connor I am so sorry." I apologise and there's a lump in my throat. I'm going to cry too. Oh no. The door opens and in walk Stanley and Patty. Their holding hands and laughing but the laughter dies due to the atmosphere in the room.

"Who died?" Stan jokes and Connor suddenly looks angry. Oh here we go.

"Our relationship!" He snaps and goes off to his room, slamming his door. I swear I can hear him crying. Stan and Patty look at me and I can feel a tear roll down my face.

"What the fuck?" Stan asks. I sniff. I don't want to keep crying. But I can't help it. He sits down beside me and Patty remains by the door. We don't know eachother too well so I guess she feels awkward." Richie, what happened?"

"I cheated." I cry and Stan gasps. I feel so ashamed. He probably hates me now. My oldest friend probably hates me.

"With who?" He asks, putting a gentle arm around me. I relax slightly and lean my head on his shoulder. Stanley smiles at Patty and she goes over to get me a glass of water. I guess Stan wants me to sober up.

"Eddie." I reply and Stanley chuckles. He then coughs to cover it up." Oh god what have I done?"

"Here you are." Patty says, handing me the glass of water.

"Can't I have anything stronger?" I ask.

"You can't keep relying on alcohol to cheer yourself up, Rich. It's not healthy. You'll be an alcoholic!" Stanley snaps, letting go of me. I sigh and sip of the water.

"Sorry. I'm sorry." I sigh and Stanley rubs circles on my back gently. Patty smiles at me and I smile back." I love him."

"Who, Connor?" Stan asks and he sounds a bit perplexed.

"No! Eddie. I love Eddie and I told him. He didn't say it back. I think I scared him off." I explain and Stanley nods.

"You probably didn't. I think it was just...a surprise." Stanley says and I nod this time.

"I reckon you and Eddie would make a beautiful couple." Patty says and I chuckle slightly before looking at Stan.

"Keep her, I like her." I say and Stan grins. Patty chuckles and hugs me. I stand up and hug her back. She is so cool.

-
I have a headache. I have a really bad headache I don't have any aspirin. So, I have no choice but to go to Eddie's dorm. I knock on the door and shove my hands in the pockets of my leather jacket.

"Oh, hi." He says as he opens it. He doesn't open it all the way, almost hiding something.

"Hey. I have a headache can I have some aspirin?" I ask.

"Sure sure." He says and I go to follow him in but he stops me.

"Why can't I go in?" I ask.

"Eddie bear, what's going on?" Someone asks and it sounds like his mom. I know Sonia. Why doesn't he want me to see her?

"Is that your mom?" I ask and Eddie's eyes go wide. He shakes his head quickly. Only his mom calls him Eddie bear. He hates that nickname." Who is it?"

Eddie sighs and opens the door, allowing me in. There's a woman sat on his bed and holy shit, I thought it was his mother. But she's too young to be her. She stares at me disapprovingly.

"Richie, this is Myra. Myra, Richie." Eddie sighs. My eyes go wide. This is his girlfriend. What the fuck?

"Hi." I manage to say but she doesn't reply. Eddie rolls his eyes and goes off to his bathroom, leaving me and Myra in an awkward silence." So...what do you study?"

"Business." She replies. I nod.

"Cool cool. I do acting. But I want to be a comedian." I say. She just glances at me. Luckily, Eddie saves the conversation by walking back in.

He hands me the aspirin and our fingers brush together. He glances up at me and I want to kiss him so badly. But Myra is here and we can't do that. Instead, I just take the aspirin, putting it into my pocket.

"Thanks." I breathe out. Oh lord, stop the thoughts rushing through my mind. Eddie smirks and then walks me out, closing his door slightly. I go to stay something, but his lips come crashing down on mine and I try not to let out a startled gasp.

"Sorry. I just had to." He apologises as we pull away. I laugh a little and just admire him. His freckles, his smile, the small blush set on his face.

"So, are we good then?" I ask and he chuckles, itching closer to me. I smile.

"Yes. We're good." He says.

"Connor and I broke up." I say. He nods and kisses my neck. I close my eyes. Oh god. This is actually happening. In the hallway of the dorm block. With his girlfriend on the other side of the door." Eddie."

"Mhm." He mumbles.

"Stop." I say and he does. He chuckles lightly and kisses me gently. I pull away." Myra is on the other side of the door. I...we can't do this if you're going to stay with her."

"Richie." He sighs, the light in his eyes going out." I can't break up with her."

"Then I can't do this. Not right now. It hurts too much." I sigh and I turn to walk away. I'm going to ignore Stan's advice and drink. I need a drink.

"Rich!" Eddie calls out but I ignore him. I can't be with him if he's got a girlfriend. That's wrong. That's so so wrong and I'd feel so guilty.