My school counselor,in middle school wanted me to talk to a therapist because I was drinking in school and I was just hurting myself even more. So I was called down in the counseling office, and then the school counselor introduce me to a therapist and I said ,"I'm not crazy!". And the counselor replies, "I know you're not. I just wanted you to talk to her (therapist) because you won't talk to me on why you are drinking.I think she will help you".
As the counselor left the room, the therapist introduces herself and says,"I know this might be a little hard for you to open up, but just know whatever you are holding inside, it is better to talk about it".
Then she goes on and says,"How long have you been drinking?". Then I replied," 3 months". With her face shocked,she goes on and says,"That long? Where would you get it from?". Then I replied, feeling annyoyed, "I would get it in my.refrigator my mom has a lot of wine bottles that she doesn't even count how many she has".
"You know teenage girls who drink that long were 1. Being abused at home. 2. Being bullied and depressed. Or 3. Sexaully Assaulted. Which one is it?" She said.
I looked at her and started having watery eyes and said "3".
"What happened?" she said.
I just sat there frozen couldn't tell her, then she grabbed some line paper and slide it towards me and said, "Here, I think this would be easier for you to tell me what happened. Take your time."
Then, I just started writing non-stop. I wrote about my uncle and what he did to me and how many times he did. I also wrote down how I told my parents about it and they did nothing to help me and I wrote why I was drinking, and it was because it distracts me from clearly viewing my problems. I wrote 5 pages and I gaved them to her. The bell rang,which was time for lunch, and I said "May I go to lunch?" Then she replies, "Of course. I will read these and will check up on you next week. Today was the start to open up and you did by just writing. Good start! See you next week!"
Next week, I was called down to the counseling office and when I went inside, the therapist, counselor, and the principal was there. "Please sit down" counselor said. And as I sat down, the pages I wrote on were in the principal's hands and she said, "I'm so sorry to what happened to you since you were 8 years old. Now, we have to talk to your parents and tell them they have to report it. It's for your own safety".
I stand up from my chair and told them with anger," I already told my parents about what happened to me since I was 8! They didn't do anything to help me. It felt like they didn't care or just didn't believe me at all! What makes you think you can convince them that they will report this?!"
After that, I just stormed out the room, and the counselor was calling my name to come back inside and I said, "NO!!!" Then she ran up to me and stopped me. Then the counselor told me,"You need a hug". And I told her, "I don't want a hug" . Then she started walking up to me, hugged me and whispered,"Just let it out, whatever you're holding back, get it off your chest". Then I was sobbing and screaming. She was hugging me harder and said,"If your parents don't report it, then I will! I will help you get through this, as far as it takes to give you justice and peace. I will, with all my strength, get you through this. I promise."
After that day, the counselor called my parents to have a meeting with the principal, therapist, and the counselor. I was there with them and the counselor showed them the pages that I wrote and my mom said, "We will report it. Don't worry. I will make sure my daughter will be safe".
My parents didn't report it. They just said to never talk about it with the counselor or the therapist again.
I was just so close to have my uncle out of my life. I wish my parents could see what I'm going through, but I guess they will never understand or just believe me.
Will I ever get by?
