Love Torment

Two

"Here I am.This is me."

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Seated crossed legged in front of a mirror, I was silently staring at myself. It had been said that if you stared at yourself in the mirror for long enough, your face would morph to that of a monster. As I stared in the mirror, I was seeing just that.

It all began when I had simply zoned out in front of the mirror. Realising I was quite close to the mirror, I decided to check how dark my eyes truly were. Then I stared at myself. I was marveling at the idea of how I would react if my reflection moved without command. All in all, I was partaking in regular reflection shenanigans.

Things got obscure when I fell into a sort of trance. I was unwilling to move and I was watching myself ever so intently. Seconds grouped together and gave the passage of time. I was still staring at my reflection when the silence of my surroundings became clear and unnerving.

The scare came when my face slowly shifted and morphed into the thing I most detested. I turned into my worst fear. I turned into a MONSTER.

In that moment.

I saw my parents.

Both morphed into one and staring at me with cold dead eyes. It brought chilling memories of the past. A thing that I preferred to be kept in such a state, the past. How could I move on when it was with me? When it was me. When I saw it everyday in the mirror.

I would rate that experience a terrifying 10\10. Would recommend to a nearby psychological torture facility.

I jumped up from my seated position and jumped on the tiles silently as I warmed myself up from the heat I lost to the cold tiles. I gave myself a smile as I examined my getup.

I was freshly showered. My hair was clean and put high up in puff. My face was without a lot of essentials needed to get it at it's best but I levelled with a simple make up no makeup look.

I was in my under attire. Thick high waist beige spanks, my push up bra and I added a tight white vest themed crop top. One would call it an outfit.

Yet, I wasn't in the mood to explain how I acquired the thick and prominent long scar that crossed over the area above my heart. At that thought, I subconsciously lifted a hand to lace my fingers over the scar. Mentally, I was past it. It wasn't painful anymore. I was okay. It was a part of the childhood trauma. That was always such a bore to reminisce.

Yet.

I still felt a certain pressure in my chest if I looked at it for too long. I shifted my eyes to the ones in my reflection. I smiled myself and yet a stray tear decided to make it's way down my cheek. I stared at the state I was in. I was broken. Why was I broken? I didn't want to be broken. Did I need a therapist? I wiped away the tear with speed as I continued my venture.

I turned to the chair right below the window and went to pick up the bag beside it. The bag contained everything I needed for the night. I jumped onto the chair and pushed the bag through the window first. With the bag still tightly in my hand, I pushed the rest of me through the window. Once I was on the other side, I carefully placed the bag over my shoulders.

I was on the second story, standing on the window seal of my bathroom with the night to mask my misdeeds. I needed to carefully move across to the ladder that was tall enough to bring me down safely. It was a grand idea but with the bulky kicks I had on, I was confident I could safely make the jump.

First thing we had to acknowledge about yours truly was that I could jump. I wasn't afraid to fall and I was really great at the whole landing thing. It was something I prided myself in. It was the one thing my parents couldn't be disappointed in.

With that thought, I let myself be taken be gravity. It was quick and it was over in the blink of the eye. In a second, my feet were planted on the grass and I was jogging across to the side gate that would allow my escape. With the pin that was needed to open it, I did as such. As I walked out, I dragged along my bike that was left beside the gate. When I was safely on the other side, I closed the gate and went straight to getting myself dressed up.

I simply put on a slightly baggy short sleeved satin shirt. I slid on the form fitting mini skirt and made sure to tuck in the shirt. I undid the first few buttons to that the crop top would show but not the scar. With that in order, I straddled onto the bike and moved my feet with the pads to prompt travel.

Everything was sorted back home. Under the blankets, pillows took my form. Kate, my aunt's assistant would check up on me on occasion and the pillows would suffice. Dixie, my cat was fast asleep next to the pillows, unknowing. Everyone back home was awake. They would be awake for the rest of the night. I intended on returning when they would all be asleep.

The trip to my destination wasn't short but it was a simple route which helped make it quick. In the distance I could see where I needed to be.

The night was yet to begin.

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"Took you long enough to get here." Jess stated as she excitedly skipped over to me. I was safely securing my bike to ensure it would be there when the night was over.

When I got up to face her, I was engulfed in a hug. I humoured it for a solid three seconds before I pulled away with a small smile. I looked over her attire. She was dressed in high waist shorts with a sweater that slid off her shoulder and tucked in slightly. She had on kicks much like mine and had her waves of dark hair moved to one side of her head.

One thing I most loved about Jess was our common pride in dressing to impress. To look great but still preserve a sense of comfort in your clothing.

"I was staring at myself in mirror dramatically. Thinking about my parents and such." I told her truthfully as I let her interlock our arms together. She hummed at me knowingly as if to agree that such moments do occur on occasion.

"You look gorgeous, as usual." She told me as we reached the door of the building. As she was pushing it open, I said my thanks.

"You look great too, thanks. What did I miss with our guests?" I questioned as we entered the room and I got a sense of the atmosphere.

VPN was a coffee shop. On occasion, it hosted parties. It got entertainment, food and drinks. The mood was always great but they liked to keep things low key. Since it was more tame than what our generation would prefer, it tended to be for people actually looking to socialize. It was perfect for Jess's quest.

Jess was all about broadening her social network. She was hopping around from group to group and leaving her sparkle as she went. It was just another weekend of finally getting to know more people from school. I couldn't lie, most of the time it was fun hanging out with different people all the time. The experiences were different and unique.

"Let's go and find out." She said to me with a sly smile.