Change For Me

9. idiot

~~~~

Taron and Eva have their own conversation with the boys. They laugh and talk amongst themselves. On the contrary, me and Sofie sit in silence as though we're unsure on what to do and how to interact with them.

We awkwardly listen to them speak, scroll through our phones time to time, and I personally scribble around my paper—something I do when anxious.

"I saw your stories on Instagram Ellie," Taron says, moving the topic of their conversation on me. I suddenly feel nervous because of the sudden attention from them. "You looked like you had so much fun during the summer."

"Yeah I did," I nod honestly. Only if you consider babysitting your cousins fun.

"I also saw your post," Roman smirks. Eva smacks the back of his head which makes me furrow my brows. "What?" He rubs his head.

I bite my cheek. His comment rubs me the wrong way, causing different thoughts to run through my head.

"You looked good. Don't worry," Taron reassures once she notices my skepticism. Eva nods as well to prove Taron's point. "So, what classes do you have?" Taron changes the subject.

I look around awkwardly. "Um well tomorrow I have ap bio, chem, and advanced functions."

"You," Conrad points at me, "Will be dead at the end of the week." I laugh in total agreement with him because why in the world did they organize my hardest classes in one day?

"I'm not kidding," Conrad says in a more serious tone. "My brother didn't sleep for the first few months of school because of his math and science classes. He then spent the rest of the year quote-in-quote catching up to his sleeping schedule." He explains, "I don't know how you do it."

I shrug my shoulders in response to his indirect comment. I doodle around my notebook as a distraction.

I don't know how either.

Perhaps it's the pressure of needing to succeed. I don't want to risk my future or worse, get in trouble with my parents.

"Sofie has the same classes as me too," I point to her as I try to divert the focus away from me.

"It's a hassle and it's not like I have a choice either. I'm doing this for my mother anyways." Sofie explains. "When the time comes, I don't want my kids to experience what I went through just to get into college. It's not worth it." She moves her hands around frustratingly.

"I feel you," me and Eva say at the same time.

"Why you so quiet?" Taron shoves Jae's shoulder. He peers up from his phone to look at all of us.

Instead of replying to Taron, he shows Conrad and Roman something on his phone. They laugh at whatever is on his screen until he proceeds to scroll again. 

"Idiot," Conrad mutters at Jae.

"Okay?" Taron glares at them before initiating another conversation between the girls.

~

"I'll see you tomorrow," Taron calls over her shoulder as her and Sofie walk to their next period.

Roman and Eva left early during spare to "do something". Knowing them, it's "something" I don't want details to. Sofie was supposed to have gym with me until she realized that it was a course she didn't choose. Hence she decided to visit the counselor's office with Taron who also has an issue with her schedule.

I swing my bag over my shoulder and make my way to my locker. I'm half way out of the recreational room until I hear someone calling for me.