Change For Me

20. not this again

~~~~

"So did your parents say yes?" The whole table looks at me. They're too hopeful for my answer.

"Yes, because you told me to ask." I recall the other day, when Eva and Taron were determined to convince me in going to Conrad's Halloween party.

Conrad talked to me about it last week. I've never considered it. I'm not a party type of person. It will make me feel out of place—I know it will. But of course, Eva begged me to ask my parents, and doesn't take "no" as an answer. To a point, Claire and Lisa got involved as well.

~last night~

Eva:
Do it

Me:
No!!
My parents will rip me to shreds.

I think about the many possibilities, all of which aren't good, of what can happen when I tell them. I've never asked to go to a party—a boy's party specifically. I really don't know what to expect with this one.

Eva:
Why?

Me:
The life of an only child🙄

Eva:
Just try, you don't know

I place my phone down after thinking through it. It's a process with different steps. I always do it. Once I've gathered enough courage, I force myself off my bed. As I turn the knob of my door, I get a notification.

Lisa:
BITCH YOU BETTER COME!
I don't want to be an outsider at his party

Claire:
Wdym? You'll be fine

Lisa:
I don't hang around Conrad and them😒 it'll be so awkward if I go.
I'm begging Ellie to ask rn

Claire:
Ellie please come
We want you there
I don't want to deal with Lisa

Lisa:
Hey!!!🖕

Me:
Yeah yeah
Hold up I'll go ask

I throw my phone on my bed. I don't want the distractions. I also don't want the possibility of it taken away from me as some sort of punishment. I take a deep breath before walking towards my parents' room.

I knock on the door and open it wide open. An unsettling feeling crawls up my back—I don't like it. In the room, my mom is on the bed scrolling through Facebook while the news is on the tv—her usual.

"Hi," I smile. She returns one over her shoulder. "What time is dad coming home?" I start with small talk. I have to.

"I don't know sweetie, why?" She looks from her phone then to me.

"Uh, nothing." I shrug cursing at myself for backing out too soon. I watch the tv for a second, leaning myself on the door frame. I'm hoping more of the courage magically comes to me.

"Hey, mom."

"Yeah," she hums. My stomach flips and my heart beat quickens.

"Conrad invited me to his Halloween party." I suck in my breath, waiting for my mom to say something. She knows what I mean from the sentence alone.

It makes me more nervous when she hesitantly says, "I don't know, I have to ask your dad."

"Please mom, Claire and Lisa are going and they want me to come with them." I cross my fingers behind my back, praying to the gods they'll help me out with this one.

"On a school night?" She raises a brow.

"I know but it is a Halloween party." I laugh to prevent her from hearing the anxiety through my voice. "Their house is down the corner anyways, you know." I add to ease her more about this party.