Liberties have been taken with Gerard's gender

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No I am not implying that Gerard is anything but a cis man (as nothing has been said about it) I just thought the first one would fit them well

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Gerard: the best part about not having a gender is every sort of attraction I feel is gay

Some asshole: you have a gender, it's in your pants

Gerard: everyone! My gender is 67 cents, a pen cap, and some lint

-x-

Mikey: I ate like 6 sandwiches in 4 minutes and now I can't move

Ray: I can offer mouth to mouth

Mikey: don't you dare extract any of my sandwiches

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Ray: Major cereal subgenres: healthy, fake healthy, fruit flavored, marshmallows, breakfast foods, Cap'n Crunch variants

Gerard: Cheetos

Ray: Cheerios are like the archetypal healthy cereal, come on

Ray: wait

Ray: Now Hold On Just A Moment

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Mikey: if you elect me as president I will personally burn the constitution my first day in office

Ray: then what

Mikey: funnel all the defense budget into building a time machine so I can go to the past and fight the Beatles

Frank: change we can believe in

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Ray: who the fuck enjoys the taste of sour candy. Who the fuck says "I'm going to eat this sugary sweet coated in pain salt and I'm gonna fucking like it"

Mikey: me

Frank: Feed Me The Pain Salt

Gerard: if my eye isn't twitching it isn't sour enough

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Gerard: self care is chugging a lava lamp

Ray: no

Gerard: glug

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Gerard: I'm this close to putting hot sauce on my toes

Gerard: I forgot to give context for this

Frank: what context could you possibly give that would make this any better

Gerard: my cats Mitch and Lotion are aggressive toe biters and they will stop at nothing to attain the experience of feet in their mouth

-x-

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