Save ourselves- One Direction

Avery

I tried to sleep. Really, I tried. But the bunk was much too hard and the pillow was musty. There was no blanket. And a proper toilet... don't ask. There was a bucket in a corner.

I spent the first two or three hours crying and images of Lucy screaming at me kept coming into my head. And then of Harry, Liam and Niall lying on the floor and getting beaten up. But eventually I had no more tears, my eyes were burning and I felt completely exhausted.

So I blindly made my way to the cot and lay down on it, deciding at least to close my eyes. Time passed painfully slowly and only by looking at my watch, which had luminous pointers, could I tell what time it really was. I closed my eyes and tried to fall asleep, but I couldn't. So I just dozed off. At some point the light under the door also disappeared, so I assumed that it had become dark outside by now.

When the clock finally showed me midnight and 12.07.2010 began, I was about to burst into tears again. I had celebrated 15 birthdays so far and I remember that at least two of them had not gone as planned. That hadn't necessarily made the birthdays bad, but it had been strange at first. But this one was different. Until now, I had never spent my birthday completely alone in a dark bunker after being beaten up for trying to help someone. I don't think you can imagine a worse birthday.

Actually, the plan was that Mum and Dad would be back three days before and I would celebrate with Eva and Carlotta.

No matter what we would have done that day, it would have been a thousand times better than this.

I realized that maybe I hadn't always been the best-behaved child in the world, but I certainly wasn't such a bad person that I deserved this, was I?

If my parents had really wanted this for me, then I had really never known them.

Inevitably, I remembered all the good things I had experienced with my parents so far. All the Christmases, birthdays, holidays and getaways. They had always been so loving and full of understanding. They had been there for me when I was sad and had supported me when I was feeling lost.

And now one signature from them had been enough to bring me to this place. That didn't make any sense.

For hours I thought about it.

And at some point I actually fell asleep without realizing it.

***************************************************

I was woken up by the door opening briefly and someone putting something on the floor. Before I could really realize what was happening, the door closed again behind me.

I crept forward and found a tray with a cold bowl of porridge and a bottle of water on the floor in front of the door.

Not exactly my favorite meal, but I ate the entire bowl anyway, not knowing when I would next get something to eat. I did, however, portion out the water.

Once again I sat with my back against the door, since that was where most of the light and noise from outside reached me.

It must have been about 24 degrees outside, but I felt as if I were sitting in a cooler. The bunker was made of stone and didn't give off any heat to the inside. I was wearing a T-shirt with long sleeves and jeans, but I had been shivering since I was stuck in the bunker.

That would certainly be ironic. Freezing to death in a bunker in Denmark during the summer, I thought cynically.

I thought about how I was going to get through the day. There was nothing I could do. Nothing to distract myself with.

I couldn't see anything and outside I could only faintly hear the birds chirping and the wind rustling.

At that moment, I really would have given a lot just to feel the sun on my skin. Or the wind in my hair. Or Harry's hand in mine.