See Me

9

As soon as I heard the back door open, I slid my glasses back onto my face.

"Here." Zane said as he approached me, holding his hand out and gently placing the bikini I was wearing last night in my hands. I had asked him to grab it from the floor of my room where I left it. I nodded in response, grabbing the bottle of vodka and heading over to the metal fire pit that was inlaid into the stone courtyard.

"What are you doing?" Zane asked me from where I had left him.

I didn't answer him. Instead, I tossed the bikini into the fire pit. I unscrewed the lid of the vodka, taking a quick drink before I poured it on the white material. Before Zane could protest any further, I flicked my lighter and held the flame to the now alcohol soaked bathing suit, praying it would be enough to light it.

Thankfully, it caught on fire quickly, and I yanked my hand away as fast as I could, not wanting my skin to burn in the process.

I felt a brief sense of satisfaction as I watched it burn. It had once been my favourite, my go to swim wear. I can't count the number of times that it's been in this very hot tub standing only 10 feet away from us. Now, however, it was only proof of what happened last night.

It was the weak, last defence between myself and Jax. It was the only thing that was contaminated. Well, besides me.

And now, I was watching as the blue flames devoured it, turning it char black as the plastic material melted and burned.

"Why did you do that?" Zane asked me, his voice calm and calculated. He had walked over to join me, not that I had noticed until I heard him speak.

I didn't look way from the flames to answer him. "I didn't want it anymore."

"I can see that. I'm wondering why your first instinct was to set it on fire." He mused, a mix of concern and humour barely peaking through his voice.

I simply hummed in response, taking a seat on the small bench that was beside the fire pit. My concentration remained on the now diminishing flames. How easy it had been to erase the suit from existence. If only I could do the same to my memory.

I felt Zane lower his body to the bench, so he was sitting beside me. He was close enough now that I began to feel uncomfortable, so I slid away. Just a few inches. He wouldn't notice.

I began flicking the lighter in my hand again, holding the flame for a couple seconds at a time before letting go. Such a powerful thing, fire. It only takes a second before it latches on to whatever it can find. Once it gets started, there's not much you can do to stop it. My hand acted of it's own will, bringing a small curl of my hair towards the flame. Teasingly, I brought it closer and closer, imagining the reaction between the flame and the strands of hair if the two ever met.

It was like a spasm, a muscle jerk, like when you're dreaming of falling and you wake up before you hit the ground, the way my brain told my hand to bring my hair into the flame completely. I watched with distant intrigue as the strands briefly held on to the flame in place before growing larger and quickly climbing upwards. I just stared at it, noticing the smell of burnt hair infiltrate my nose.

A gust of breath from Zane's mouth suddenly pushed the flames off my hair, the ends of which shivered up into small balls.

"What the fuck are you doing?" Zane barked out in a panicked voice. I turned my head to look at him, and flinched slightly when I realized his face was right beside mine. I had forgotten he was there. I had forgotten he existed, frankly. I could tell he was trying to keep a calm face, but the tensing of his forehead gave away his level of slight panic.