bughead || broken

40

It's been a month , I haven't done to much because I've prioritized myself , i ruined so much thinking that there was something wrong with me , chasing for something that didn't exist , I've realized what I am now , or at least I've tried , with that understanding I think it'd be okay for me to try and meet new people witout the fear of me being a burden in there life , I didn't feel to much anger anymore , or sadness , I channeled all my emotions into school , witch definitely wasn't healthy but it worked , I was wandering around while I was waiting for Sage and accidentally bumped into to someone "oh Im sorry" , "oh hey Betty" "oh hi , jughead" I said , "what are you doing at the musical division" "I'm waiting for my friend" "oh" "this looks , fun"I said , "it's not" "well it's college so nothing is entertaining is it" "not really no" "I'm thinking of getting into music again" "again" "my dad had this huge piano and when I was little it was like my way of coping , so I got really good , like Elton John good but my mom didn't let me take I when we moved , so now it's probably rotting in some land fill " "do you still know how to play" "probably" "there's one over there" he said while pointing in the corner " i sat down at it "what do you want me to play " "you pick" I played writer in the dark , or the bit of it I remembered "that was , impressive" then sage walked in "Betty let's go" she said , "alright well I've got to go" "well me and my band are having a show tonight , if you want to come" , He handed me a flyer with the stuff on it "Yeah , I'll be there" "alright" he said before I walked out , "we're you just talking to you're high school boyfriend" "so" "you poor thing" "what" "oh cmon you're not over him" "we broke up like 8 months ago , trust me I'm over it" "is that why you didn't go to prom with a date and you haven't talked to any body besides me or Jules in the last 8 months" , I stayed quiet for a few seconds while the thought of my loneliness sinking in "I get you're scared but you can't live in fear you're entire college years , "the best years of you're life" " just forget it , I can't talk to anyone nowadays" "no you can m just weird to go to the concert of the person you were in love with for over a year" I shook my head , "you know if there's any love songs it's automatically about you" "yeah whatever"  ,
     It was night time and I walked into the place were it was at , it was a tiny place but had a ton of people ,it had been a few songs in when he did a cover sing of "the world caves in" by Matt Maltese , we made eye contact a uncomfortable amount of times , witch was weird because he did tend to look at the floor while he sang , he said it keeps it from being awkward , by the time it was done everyone started clapping , I felt my phone buzzing so I walked out and picked it up , it was from the rehab facility my mom was at , I quickly picked it up "hello" "hi Elizabeth" I heard my mom say, "hi" "I've cleaned my act up I really have Betty , for real this time , when I get home I'm gonna sell the house and we can move and we can all go live in a nice big house just me you and Charles and we'll be happy betty" "mom me and Charles are at college" "what" "I'm not gonna have this conversation again , we're not coming home mom you do this every other day you're not better you're never gonna be fucking better" she ended the call and I sat there in silence for a few seconds , I felt someone tap my shoulder and shot back in response "oh jughead , hey" "hey" "loved the show by the way" "why are you crying" he asked , "just called my mom" "is she doing better" "that's what I tell myself" "that sucks" , I nodded "well I'm gonna go study for the next 5 hours it was really good tonight by the way I'll be sure to go to you're next show" before I walked away he grabbed my wrist , " so what do you want to do about , this" he said referring to me and him , "well I think you're a really good guy , that makes really good music" "not that , I mean we can make this a relationship, you know without any romantic aspect , when you're ready of course" , I nodded "inky if you promise me something" he nodded , 'please don't fall in love with me , ever again" "you got it" "great"