"It was absolutely nothing. I had no ties. No bittersweet memories. I was leaving nothing behind. Never experienced companionship, never been in love. And in that moment, all I felt was loneliness and regret."
But there's always a first time..
Oops! This image does not follow our content guidelines. To continue publishing, please remove it or upload a different image.
''Hey.'' I smiled when I saw the nurse come in, Arthur stood up ''Congratulations, Lancelot.'' He spoke before leaving the room, I nodded and let the nurse take care of the cut on my scalp ''It seems to me that ou are going to need a few stitches on that." She said "Alright." When I finished speaking, Harry and Egssy walked in the door "How are you?" Egssy approached along with Harry "I'm going be fine.'' I smiled at them both, Harry looked worried and was paying attention at everything around me as if something was going to hurt me, I closed my eyes tightly when I felt the needle of the local anesthesia enter my head, I felt a hand grabbing mine and I looked up seeing Harry with a painfull look on his face "I'm fine." I shook his hand and blinked.
When I got home later, Harry was waiting for me on the sidewalk "Hello sir." I smiled and kissed his cheek "How are you?" he asked as we both entered the front door "I got it!'' I pulled a bottle of painkiller out of the bag towards him. I walked to my room and dropped my things on the table, I yawned tiredly and sat on the bed to take off my shoes ''You know...'' Harry came into the room with a glass of water, I looked at him as he left it on the little table next to the door ''What do you think about working with Merlin?'' Harry said, I looked confused at him ''What is this about?'' I asked getting up ''Helping Merlin, instead of...'' he tried to articulate a way of saying it right "Is this because of today?" I said looking into his eyes, which were paying more attention to the white bandage around my head, he was silente, I rolled my eyes "Sometimes it's dangerous." He said ''Am I weak now?'' I said a little irritated, knowing that I was being overrated ''No, on the contrary.'' He tried to defend himself ''Harry, I fought for a long time to be where I am now, and it's not a man who will decide if what I'm going to do, making me stop doing what I do to be a secretary.'' I spillet, he sighed in response ''It not what I meant.'' He closed his eyes ''In the end it was, and you're not even my boyfriend to be giving me safety sermons!'' I said, starting to get angry, that was one of the things that irritated me the most ''I'm sorry. You're right.'' Harry said looking down ''Go home, please, I want to rest.'' I sat on the bed and touched my still sensitive head ''I want to stay.'' Harry said ''Why? Go and enjoy your night, I'm sure you have a lot to do.'' I said taking a pill for the pain ''I'll stay!'' He repeated ''Why...'' before I could finish the question, he shouted towards me ''Because I'm afraid of losing you!'' we stared at each other for a few seconds, Harry had an expression of fear on his face, what had happened to me was nothing serious, but I had a slight understanding of what he felt ''I'm sorry, okay?'' He continued ''I don't know how to deal with this, I don't know what to do, I don't know if I will be able to protect you forever, or even if I will be able to, maybe someday i won't...'' he seemed nervous, I got up and hugged him.
Harry sighed deeply and wrapped his arms around me, I was so in love with that man, every day at work was a bliss ''Please don't leave me...'' he whispered, I looked at him, who kept eyes closed and I gave a sweet kiss on his lips ''I still don't know the right way to do this...'' he spoke again against my face ''What does your heart say?'' I whispered leaning against our foreheads ''That we should be together. Far away from here, maybe Hawaii, living a normal life..'' he stroked my backs ''What's even normal?'' I giggled ''Stay with me.'' he held my face and looked into my eyes ''I'm here" I replied "No... Be mine, only mine." He ran his eyes over every detail of my face "I can't believe I fell that hard in love with someone.." He gave me a kiss on the lips ''Someone so beautiful, so intelligent, I never thought that someone like that would pay attention to me.'' I looked confused at him when he finished the sentence ''If you knew that from the first day you walked in the door, it was the first time in my life my heart went up to my throat.'' He kissed me again ''Harry.'' I said steping away a little ''Any woman would pay to be with you.'' I touched his chest, he approached again ''Not woman like you.'' He smiled ''Like me? Young, agent...'' I chuckled but then his smile disappeared, as if I had reminded him of something that bothered him a lot ''What happened?'' I asked ''Do you know how old I am?'' He looked me in the eye again, I shook my head in a no ''I'm 47, in three years I'll be 50, and you'll be making...'' I cut him off right away ''Harry!'' I said ''I know very well of all this, and I really hope you understand that if it isn't you, it won't be anyone else!'' I held his face ''It's not true.'' I sighed looking at that man who had won my heart completely, in such a strong way.
I tried my best to hide my real feelings so I wouldn't look so weak in front of them all, but the truth was that every time I saw Harry in the morning, my heart race, as if I was going on a roller coaster and every time his eyes they crossed mine, my knees became weak, the sound of his voice left me breathless and always when we exchanged touches, kisses, intimacies, I felt in the bottom of my stomach, that I loved him. Age has always been a mental barrier for him, I felt it, but what a 15-20 year difference was going to cause so bad, I loved every bit of him, every detail, everything about him was special and perfect in my eyes.
''I'm completely in love with you.'' He said holding my two hands, hearing those words coming out of his mouth made me smile like a little girl ''Have dinner with me.'' He ordered ''I need to finish the report, Harry.'' I smiled ''How about next week?'' I put my arms around his neck ''Okay!'' He smiled ''Rest, I'm gonna do the report for you.'' He kissed my forehead, I lay on the bed and covered myself closing my eyes and fell asleep listening to Harry's soft noises in the room, coming and going.
I opened my eyes slowly and rolled over on the bed noticing that Harry was still sitting at the desk in the corner of the room, with a lamp on and typing on the computer, I watched him for several minutes, his posture on the chair, the white shirt hugging his waist and his fast fingers writing ''Harry...'' I whispered, he looked back and smiled fondly ''Go back to sleep.'' He stood up, coming towards me ''What time is it?'' I held his hand when he sat on the bed next to me "It's 1 am." He spoke softly, I groaned knowing that I had slept too early, I looked at his thighs and torso over the low warm light of the lamp and brought my hand up to his belly, sticking my fingers inside his shirt feeling his skin warm and soft, while I received his caress on my hair, I fell asleep again smelling his clothes.
