10 Years I Loved You Most || Yoongi x Reader

•Ch.21•

Hyunbin POV
Weight loss is something that happens with everyone.. but with Y/n its something that happened too sudden. The amount of weight she would lose overnight was scary for not only me but for everyone around her. Now matching her pale skin with her skeleton like body, strangers would say that she was a watching corpse now. But even though this was all happening to her she still held her head high and fought everyday. But as each day passed I could see how tired she was from just having to push herself up from her bed. The prominent bags under her eyes along with her uneven breathing, I knew that time wasnt on her side. 

Walking through the halls and entering her room I noticed that she wasnt in bed. Knowing where she was I made my way outside and saw her walking through the garden and she held onto Namjoon for support. Noticing me there she sent me a smile while gently waving me over "Oppa... good morning" she greeted in her now small weak voice.  With a smile forming on my lips as I walked over to her I reached my hand out grabbing hers, holding it tightly in mine.

"The flowers are growing beautifully..." she commented while adoring the different flowers that were about to fully bloom. "I hope I could see them before I go.." with those words leaving her mouth Namjoon and I looked at each other knowing that we couldnt say anything. Feeling the morning breeze hit us, I took off my cardigan before draping them over her bare shoulders. "LEts get you inside now... its getting chilly" without responding we lead Y/n back into the house and into the living room where she laid herself on the couch but soon after she began to clutch her chest while breathing heavily. 

With Namjoon running to his office to get the medications I sat by her side watching over her but within a split second I saw blood... a sudden nose bleed as she was having a hard time breathing. I could tell this was too much for her to handle, but with Namjoon rushing back and giving her medications her breathing was slowly going back to normal but the amount of blood that was still flowing from her nose concerned us both. But after a few minutes and a now empty box of tissues we were finally able to stop the bleeding. 

Y/n POV
(This is getting too hard for me...) I thought as I laid myself down on the couch. A tissue in my nose as I laid there exhausted, staring at the ceiling I just wanted to break down and cry. I just wanted all the pain to go away now, that doesnt mean that im ready to die. But I just wished my prayers were answered... that with the work of God I would have been able to, somehow able to get better. To live my life normally again with everyone by my side.. but in the end I knew how this was going to end. 

Even though I have been doing chemotherapy and eveyrthing in between with Namjoon I knew that I wasnt getting better. I mean, every morning when I get up and look at myself in the mirror I could tell I was dying inside and out. My body was slowly collapsing on me, but I didnt want to admit that. I didnt want to go through the day with that mindset so I always pushed those thoughts away and smiled. But now I have to think realistically, and in reality im going to die soon. 

Using whatever strength I had in me I looked at Hyunbin oppa who was sitting on the couch opposite from me and reached my hand out to him. He looked at me with worried eyes before making his way towards me, crouching down and holding my hand. With tears immediately blurring my vision I began to cry as I called out to him weakly "Oppa..." 

With him being able to read me like a book he bit down on his lower lip knowing what I was about to say. Tears filling his eyes as they soon flowed down his cheeks, he cried but was able to stutter some words out. "A-Are you sure t-t-that this i-is what... y-you want..." biting down on my lower lip I slowly nodded my head causing him to let out a small whimper as he held my hand against his forehead. Hearing the sound of the floorboard creaking I shot my eyes to the door and saw Namjoons figure standing there with his hands balled into fists. "Joonie... I know what your going to say but please... I-I cant do it anymore." 

The tall man dragged his feet into the room before dropping down onto his knees in front of me. His head hanging low as he tried to hide his tears, I slowly pushed myself up before placing my free hand on top of his head. Running my fingers through his hair as his small sniffles were evident. "Joonie..." "Im sorry... Im sorry I couldnt help you Y/n.. I-I wish I could have done more for you, what kind of doctor am I if I cant even help those who are important to-" I cut him off "Shhh.. Joon, dont say that. You and everyone around us know how great of a doctor you are. And its not your fault, if anything its mine for not listening to you. If I began chemotherapy the first time you told me to I believe I wouldnt be in this situation. But it was my decision to start it late and its my decision to stop... so please. Dont blame yourself." 

Seeing him slightly nod, he slowly lifted his head before explaining "If this is what you want I wont force you to change your mind. But I want to tell you that once we stop all of you treatments the pain you feel might get worse. Your going to have a hard time baring with it, but just remember that were all by your side...." I nodded before returning a question "How long will I have??" 

"I would say... a week, or even less. Just recently your lungs had been infected which is why its getting harder for you to breathe, all the chest pain and tiredness your feeling. With your lungs being infected its called Pneumonia which is a common infection for CLL patients..." 

"I-I understand..." I spoke almost in a whisper before taking a deep breath. "Could you call everyone else.. and, well.. uhmm.. tell them???" Locking eyes with Namjoon he nodded before standing up and pulling out his phone and making calls. "Oppa... could you help me to my room please?? im.. tired." With my brother looking at me with sad eyes he gently picked me up before bringing me into my room. Pulling the covers over my body, he brushed some loose strands of my hair back with his warm fingers. "You know that I love you right??" he spoke and I nodded with a smile on my face "Of course oppa...-"

"-And you know I love you too right?"

"Of course Y/n..." 

(A/N: ASHAJSHDJSH 2 more chapters until this book is officially done. :( Kind of looking at it I noticed that this book isnt doing that well but honestly Im still happy with how this book turned out along with how its going to end. But I just want to thank all my readers who supported this book from the very start! LOVE YOU ALL! and I hope your ready for the last chapters.!)