Deepest Treasured Fantasies

Chapter 27

My head is throbbing against my pillow. I must have drank too much wine last night. I pulled myself together, grabbing on the bedside for balance.

Feeling nauseous suddenly, I ran to the bathroom and vomited, my stomach heaving its content into the toilet. "Tasha, you're phone is ringing," sigaw ni Penny, I kicked the bathroom door.

I was sweaty and panting. "Fuck," leaning my forehead against the cool surface rim when suddenly the door swung open.

"Tasha," Penny walked in holding my phone. "It was your alarm."

"Ano 'yon?", Tinuptop ko ang aking sikmura, yumuko sa may toilet bowl at nagduduwal.

"It's your tracker," there's tremors on her voice. "It says your late, your period was late."

Slowly turn my head to her. "No," I say emphatically. "Marami lang ako nainom na wine kagabi at nakain sa reception. Infact, I'm on pills kaya baka siguro late." I told her as I am trying to ignore the lump on my throat and the idea that is starting build inside my head.

She's trying to control her breathing. "You barely touch your food last night," kumuha siya ng towel sa cabinet at binasa. "Isang glass lang ng wine ang nainom mo," lumuhod siya at pinunasan ang mukha ko.

My stomach tighten, threatening to make me sick. "No," I shook my head vigorously. "Hindi, I can't..I, can't." Hindi ko magawang mabigkas ang mga salitang nabubuo sa utak ko.

Naintindihan ni Penny ang gusto kong tukuyin. "There's only one way to find out. Hintayin mo ako rito," Inalalayan niya ako papuntang kwarto. "May bibilihin lang ako sa pharmacy sa lobby."

"Nasaan si Shiela?" I asked worriedly.

Penny grabbed her purse. "Nagpaalam siya kanina na pupunta ng mall. May pinasuyo ang pinsan at Tita niya. Babalik ako agad." pagkasabi ay lumabas na siya ng room namin.

Fuck, my body went jello when I realized what she's trying to do. Fuck, no please. Am I pregnant? Gumamit naman kami ng protection, there are times na hindi pero hindi dapat may magbunga dahil safe naman ako 'non. Fuck, no. My chin trembled. "This couldn't be happening." I mumbled.

Kinuha ko ang cellphone ko sa may kama at tiningnan 'yong period tracker. I know nothing about menstrual cycle, pero sabi sa'kin ng doctor, pills will regulate my menstrual cycle at may time na pwedeng ma-late,  nangyari na sa'kin 'yon ng ilang beses.

False alarm lang 'to. This wasn't supposed to happen to me. Tears spilled from my face, hindi pwedeng may madamay sa sitwasyon na 'to at masyadong marami na ang kahihiyan na nadulot ko kina mommy at daddy.

In a matter of minutes, Penny came back with a small brown paper on her hand. Kinuha niya ang mga laman noon at binigay sa'kin.

"Take this," she said. Taking a deep breath, I met her eyes. "Whatever happens, I'm here for you."

Pregnancy test kit in different kinds.

"Hindi ko alam kung anong pipiliin kaya binili ko na lang lahat." she sounds apologetic. "Let's go, you want me to help you?"

Umiling ako. Ilang minuto kong tinitigan ang mga test kits sa kamay ko bago tumayo. This is so shitty, bakit ko kailangang gawin 'to?

Inalalayan niya ako at nagtungo sa bathroom. Sitting on the toilet, my fingers trembled on the kits, hesitating. Madaming bagay ang tumatakbo sa isip ko.

"Tasha, are you okay?"

"Hindi pa ako tapos." sagot ko. Without a choice, I opened each kits and followed the instructions carefully. Now, all I have to do is to wait for the result.