Perfect For Me

CHAPTER 19 (Ryan Lander)

I really began to like the truce. Liam was surprisingly fun to be around with. Although I didn't have the deep connection of an old relationship with him like I did with Andy and Jeremy, I spend much of my free time with him. Often Ethan went with us, wherever we went. He was too young to be left alone and Liam preferred having his little brother with him instead of leaving him at Betty's. Something about he felt guilty for not paying her. I didn't get it, she decided herself to not take money....

But I didn't mind Ethan. He was a really cute and polite boy and I liked him. He liked me too, at least I hoped so. But one thing was strange about the Williams family. Their parents seemed to never be home. Like not one day since we started "hanging out" in September. Now we had mid-November. "Hey, can I ask you something?" Liam just nodded. "Where are your parents now?" Liam looked like a deer caught in the headlights. He seemed to shortly debate of telling me the truth or not before he sighed. "Look, I may have lied to you about that..." Ha, I knew it! "My parents.... It's complicated. But I can tell you, they are not really always on business trips. They just....don't exist?" I was a little bit hurt that he hadn't told me from the beginning but then I thought again. "At the beginning" we had been enemies. I wouldn't have told him either if I had been in his position. Well, I HAD told him about MY parents but that had happend more like on accident. So I couldn't blame him for not doing the same. But now I was curious about the why. Where his parents dead? Had he been given away at birth and just now moved out of a foster home? Was Ethan even his real brother?

I stopped myself from speaking my mind. Liam didn't seem very confident about that topic and I wouldn't pressure him into telling me anything.

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After Liam brought Ethan to bed we sat on their couch and talked. For hours. We were so into it that we hadn't noticed how dark it had become and storm that had started. Only the sudden thunder pulled us back into reality. Great. How should I get home somewhat save and dry? Liam seemed to have the same thoughts as he looked outside. "Erm....How about you sleep here tonight? I don't think it would be a good idea to go outside right now. You can sleep on the couch, I will give you a blanket and a pillow if you want to..." He was right. That was way saver than walking to my house tonight. And what was teh harm in having a sleepover with my new friend?

I texted my parents about my whereabouts even though I secretly wondered if they would be relieved if I would just disappear....

"Do you have any movies? I'm not tired just yet, we could watch something if you want to?",  I suggested. We sat next to each other, both tightly stuck under the big blanket Liam had brought me. "Sure. Do you have a Netflix log in?" I quickly snatched the TV-remote and began pressing buttons. I hesitated to choose one of my typical movies. Would he laugh at me for watching musicals? I then noticed the variety of musical movies in my "resent-watched list" Liam could see anyways. "Oh, fuck it." I thought and clicked on the picture of Sweeny Todd. Liam didn't seem like the judgemental type anyways. "Oh, never took you for the musical kind of guy. And there I thought I am the gay one." Liam smirked. I smacked his arm before ignoring his comment. "Ow!"

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When I woke up the next morning, I felt incredibly warm. And my back and neck hurt. No wonder, the couch and the pillow were unusually hard. But definitely comfortable. I tried to turn around, but I couldn't. I was stuck! After a short moment of panic I decided to look around. Maybe I could solve the problem on my own before calling for Liam. When I took notice of my environment I saw that the pillow looked suspiciously like Liam's shirt he wore last night. And the weight on my back felt like an arm. No, that definitely WAS an arm. Liam's to be exact. I carefully tried to get up but his grip tightened with each movement I made until I had no choice but lay still.

Obviously we must have fallen asleep on the couch together the night before. And my "cuddle-problem" got the best of me. I started to wriggle in Liam's arms again. "Stop that." In shock I held my breath. Liam had woken up. More or less. And his morning voice sounded incredibly se-sleepy. "Morning. Erm...could you maybe let me go...?" I asked. Suddenly I had gotten shy and couldn't look him in the eyes. "What...? Oh. Oh! I'm sorry!" Liam quickly took his arm from my back as soon as he noticed it there. I tried to sit up and get out of bed/off the couch, but the bed sheets had tangled themselves around me in a very tight way. I struggled to get free, causing Liam to laugh. Yeah, laugh as much as you want to, good luck trying to get up your- aaah! I had lost balance and collapsed on top of Liam. In reflex he had wrapped his arms around my waist once again and held me in place. I wanted to apologise but the words got stuck in my throat as soon as I looked into his eyes. They were blue. Like the ocean. The most typical description of blue eyes you can find, I know. But it just fitted!

We stared into each other's eyes for what felt like forever. "Can I kiss you?" My mind went crazy. Did he really just ask to kiss me? What should I say? No? I didn't want him to kiss me. Did I? Liam apparently took my loss of words for a yes because he gently laid his lips on mine. At first I was too shocked to move but when I had processed the warmth on my lips and the tingles he sent through my body I couldn't help but kiss him back.

Our lips moved in sync. It was a hungry kiss, but not an animalistic, violent one. No, it was a sweet one. One that puts butterflies in your stomach. Butterflies? It was true. My belly felt like thousands of little butterflies flew around in it. Did that mean I liked him? Wait, did that mean I liked HIM? A boy? I quickly pushed him away.  I wasn't gay. I didn't like boys!

Without giving him a chance to say the thousand "sorry" 's I could read on his face, I jumped off the couch, put on my shoes and slammed the door shut. What had just happened? Why had he kissed me again? And WHY THE HELL HAD I LIKED IT?