Perfect For Me

CHAPTER 27 (Liam Williams)

It had been two weeks since that faithful Saturday. Ryan and I were good. Really good. We weren't in a relationship, but it was great the way it was. We occasionally would kiss. Short secret pecks in the school's bathroom -maybe it sometimes was a little more than a peck- and as a greeting when no one was around we would kiss as well. We still argued a lot, I guess that was just the way we were. But it never was really serious, almost more like play fights. And at school we of course still put up the whole rivalry act. No one suspected anything more than friendship between us and to be exact there wasn't anything more. Like I would love for Ryan to be my boyfriend, but I was too scared to ask. What if he wasn't ready and would turn his back on me once more?

For now I had to cancel our date for tomorrow. Ryan had for once planned something for me and I couldn't make it. He even said it would be okay to bring Ethan too. But coach had given Nate a punishment because he saw him drinking alcohol, although we had strict diet until the game in February. Nate was by far not the only one who ignored the rules, but he was the only one silly enough to get caught! And now I had to help him decorate the whole school for advent tomorrow. Though I was the only one who REALLY didn't drink any alcohol!

Beep, beep, beep, be- "Hello?" "Hey Ryan!" "Hey." "Erm... I kinda have to cancel for tomorrow?" "Oh... erm can I ask why?" Shit, Ryan sounded really disappointed. I mean cancelling something last minute was a shit ass move. "Yeah, Nate got himself in trouble and now I have to help him setting things straight again. Coach assigned us to decorate the whole school..." "Oh, I'm sorry. Do you, mmmm, do you have someone to look after Ethan?" I shook my head even though he couldn't see that. "No, I will just bring him with me. Hopefully he will behave." I could feel Ryan hesitate on the other side of the line. "I, I could look after him if you want me to?" That would be amazing! But: "Thanks, but I don't want to be a burden to you. It will be okay." "You are not a burden. And neither is Ethan. I love your little brother! So come on, let me look after him!" "Oh, I see how it is! You just use me to get to my brother!", I joked in fake hurt. Ryan laughed. "Oh no, you've discovered my secret plans!... But seriously, I would love to spend some time with your brother." I sighed. "Okay, thank you. I really appreciate it."

Approximately twelve hours later I was standing in the school's parking lot, dreading to go inside. I had zero motivation to go in there and decorate. Decorate! Who thought it would be a good idea to let two bulky, completely un-artsy soccer players decide what the school would look like the next four weeks? The one definitely didn't think this through.

Yep, they totally didn't think that through. The hallways now, after two hours of hanging up garlands, looked like decorated by Ethan and his friends. And that's it described nicely. At least whoever assigned us to do this, would have learned a lesson when they saw it, to never let us do things like that again.

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"Wow, it really looks...." "Like shit?" I finished Nate's sentence. "Well...yeah. Yeah, I guess you could say that." Out of nowhere Nate started laughing. And I joined. It just was hilarious. Hilariously embarrassing that we were incapable of doing the job.

When we had calmed down, Nate looked at me. Suddenly his eyes grew big. "Is that a hickey?!" He pointed at my collar bone. What?! When had Ryan done that? I could not remember him kissing me there! My thoughts were interrupted by a once again laughing Nathan. "You...You should have seen your face! Hahaha! There-There is no hickey but, hahaha, haha, you believed it!!" I looked at him deadpanned. "Very funny." "Yeah! But WHO did you think it had been from?" "No one." Nate just continued staring at me. I sighed. "Okay... there's this boy-" "Ryan" My friend interrupted me. I didn't even try to deny it. "Yeah, Ryan. But you cannot tell anybody!... So, I kinda like him. And I think he likes me too."

"You think?! If there's a possibility, he would have given you a hickey, I think you mean he definitely likes me and is my boyfriend!" I just laughed shortly. "I wish.... But no. I want to ask him to be my boyfriend, but he's just discovered that he is not straight and has problems accepting it and I don't want to overwhelm him. I'm scared he'll run off if I asked him, but I'm also scared he will run off if I don't ask because he feels like I don't like him enough to want him as my boyfriend, but that's totally not true and now I'm-""Rambling." Nate cut me off.

"I had a feeling something was going on with you two almost two months ago. Remember the park? You denied it so vehemently, it basically confirmed my suspicions. So, I think you should ask him. If what I think is true, he has had quite some time to come to terms with himself. So, ask him. Tell him, you don't have to go public now, you just want to be exclusive. If he's not ready to be yours now, he might never be!"

I thought about Nathan's words on my way home. Probably he was right. It wasn't such a big thing to get from were Ryan and I were, to being boyfriends. I took a deep breath. I would ask him tomorrow on our date. 

And by the way: How come it sometimes felt like Nate knew me better than I did?