Under Your Skin

45

"How you feeling?"

"I got some broken ass ribs but I'm ight. Why you look all angry when you walked in here?" Nessa questioned me.

"It's nothing."

"You can tell me, I'm all caught up on your life boo."

I laughed softly. Jason and Xavier had gone down to the cafeteria to grab something to eat and Celeste had stepped out. I didn't really want to talk to Nessa about this, at least not here.

"We can talk about it when you get home-"

"Nuh uh. Come on, spill the beans."

I glanced at her as she stared at me hoping for some tea to be spilled. I guess you could say she was right.

"I know you and Xavier used to fuck around."

Her face fell and she turned her head looking up at the ceiling.

"Oh." She paused. "I guess he didn't feel right about not telling you, I'm sorry we-"

"Yea, he didn't feel like I deserved to know at all. Which is why he didn't tell me." I cut her off. "I found out from your mom."

Her face screwed up. "What?"

"Your mom knows you used to sneak him in the house when you thought she was asleep. She doesn't know that he's my boyfriend so Auntie Leste being her casual self was making conversation. Said she didn't understand why you and Xavier never got into a relationship."

Nessa shook her head.

"It wasn't like that. I'm sorry...one of us should've told you but it just didn't seem like it was important. Look, I was feeling all types of pressure to have sex when we were in the 10th grade. I was still a virgin and I didn't want to be with some random boy I didn't know. So I asked Xay. He looked at me like I was crazy but then I told him like...I was dead serious. So we did it. He took my virginity and then after that it just turned into a thing. I didn't like Xay in that way, he ain't like me in that way. We were just doing it. A while after that, he started messing around with somebody else. I wasn't comfortable fucking him and knowing he was with some other chick, cuz I didn't know where that bitch had been. Xay was never the type to be in it with 2 girls at once anyway. So that's where shit ended." She stopped her story and reached out for my hand. "We should've told you. He wanted to at first. After you were....going through your withdrawals I guess. The more time he spent with you the more he was beginning to like you like that. He hit me up saying he thought he should tell you....but Hayden I know you. You would've never given him a real chance if you knew that. It's just who you are."

"I also don't like being lied to."

"It wasn't a lie-"

"He literally told me y'all never had sex."