Drawbacks of a mind that remembers

Cozart - You're not at fault

When he said "I'll be back", Enma really meant it. Every week, he would pop by the Kudo mansion. It became a weekly visit, each time to urge the star guardian to talk to him. However, Conan soon found a pattern and avoided the redhead altogether. 

Kaito bit back a laugh as Enma recounted everything to him. Right now, the magician was the only source of information to the Vongola about Aku, being the only one who could talk to Conan without suffering from any rejections. Even Tsuna could not do anything.

Aku was determined to suffer alone. At least, that was how it felt to them. 

Tsuna exhaled through his nose slowly. Was it that hard to let others in? But this was Aku, who had his pride stomped on and trampled over regardless of which life he lived. In the past, it was his father. In the present, it was the organisation. The brunet shook his head in dismay. 

Kaito looked apologetic, or as apologetic as he could look. His poker face held strong like super glue. 

"You really can't blame him for his stubbornness," Kaito began. Enma huffed, though he nodded in understanding. "Try to be in his shoes, Cozart. He spent his life obeying what his higher-ups say, not having his own voice. When he did have his voice, he lost everything else. And now? If he speaks, he endangers everyone else. He can't live as himself. He can't act like himself. To get things done, he had to resort to begging with his puppy eyes, and even then, it might not work.

If I were him, I would most likely do the same–believe that I am the cause of everyone's misery. If I spoke to someone about my problems, potentially endangering them... I won't allow it. When someone has that mindset, it is really hard to break them out of it. Trust me, I struggle with the same thoughts whenever Aoko gets into trouble with that organisation because of my night job."

Kaito shuddered, remembering that day when Aoko was cuffed to the car model at this exhibition in the Tokyo tower. The two of them nearly died that day, and it was all because of Kaitou KID. 

He felt a comforting pat on his shoulder. "Don't we all?"

Tsuna chuckled. "Life is filled with regrets. What we do with it–how we continue after is how we heal."

Kaito heard a half-snort from Enma. The redhead turned to him, his eyes staring at the still coffee in front of him. "If only your brother would consider that."

"Cut him some slack, would you? The poor man had never caught a break at all." Kaito's gaze slid from Enma to Tsuna. He then absentmindedly stirred his cooled chocolate drink as he spoke.

"When I first met him, it was a clocktower heist. He was not shrunken then, and he commanded the police force with gusto. When I saw him in the helicopter, I knew it was him. Aku, in the flesh, guiding others as he did in the past. It made me think: was the Star flame manipulative? He's always leading others like the head honcho!" Kaito laughed with nostalgia. "That was the last time I saw him as an adult. Then next time we met, I didn't recognise him at all."

"He had shrunk then, didn't he?" Enma connected. It seemed to make a lot more sense now. "Messing with our brains. His eyes can turn colours like ours, yet there was no association like we had."

"At first, I thought nothing of it. A chance at a normal life, even though it wasn't that normal. His 'punishment' doesn't even feel like one," Kaito shrugged, now taking time to sip his drink.

"And everything changed when he was forced to visit me," Tsuna concluded. "Now I feel horrible."

While he knew that it was not his fault, (you cannot tell the future after all), it all began after he saw Aku-his cousin at his lowest. He could not help but think, "if only we didn't meet."

"Hey, you two are blood family now," Enma said, now putting his hand on the brunet's shoulder. Comically, they looked like a human chain, but the air was so thick, no one felt like laughing. "I do not doubt that even if you've never met for a long time, you'll meet one day. It's just a matter of "when". We were all unaware of the reincarnation of the night guardians, and we didn't know Kaito and Conan. This is all unexpected, and none of it is anyone's fault."

Kaito nodded in agreement. "You might have heard this from me a million times by now, but Aku had locked his memories away because of guilt. He didn't expect himself to be a reincarnated person and was living his life as a pretty normal boy, just incredibly famous and living with a reversible circumstance. Now with his memories, he feels ultra unworthy, like he wasn't allowed what he just experienced. This isn't going to be an easy road, I'm afraid. Just because you're the catalyst doesn't mean it's your fault. There are many other factors at play after all."

Tsuna could only nod his reply. As much as he would love to blame himself, he knew that Kaito was right. The blaming game can be put aside for now to reach their final destination.

The trio fell into silence.

Enma glanced at his dear friend, gulped down his cold coffee, then slammed his hands on the table. "That's it! I'm gonna try again!"

The two blinked in surprise. Tsuna was first to snap out of it and he teased the redhead.

"Don't crack his skull, mind you," Tsuna warned with a grin. However, he had a feeling it would all be fine when Enma tries again this time.

"Oh please, as if you don't wanna try that method," Enma guffawed as he made his way out of the restaurant. 

The remaining two stared at each other, then broke into fits of laughter.

Conan returned to his current living space with Ran, when he saw a familiar person sitting by the steps with his head buried in his arms. He sighed aloud, knowing what he wanted. Though the boy knew he cannot give the man what he wanted, but there is a limit to how long he could hold them off.

They are THAT determined to keep him close, even though he did not deserve it.

"Have you eaten your dinner?"

Enma lifted his head, his ruby eyes wide with anticipation.

"No I haven't–"

"Come in. I'll have Ran cook more for you."

If Tsuna and Kaito were there to watch them, they would have noted the widest smile, the great sense of accomplishment and relief that plastered on the redhead's face. It was a good sign, and a welcoming one for more to come.

A/N: warning. He will regress... a little, unfortunately