Drawbacks of a mind that remembers

Aku - Some "Me" time

After Kyoya departed, Kaito soon followed, leaving Conan alone in the library. He flumped onto the couch Kyoya previously occupied, and pulled his knees up to his chest.

He remembered the feeling of his flames dancing on his fingertips. He remembered how they coated the magnifying glass without heating it or causing severe damage. He even remembered the colour of the flame.

It was irregular. It was no simple flame that science could explain. Even the hottest flame turns blue, not this blue.

What flame is dark blue with white, silvery sparkles in between?

The appearance of his flame sparked more memories. He then scoured them for clues. Giotto once mentioned that these flames are born out of their dying will, or willpower. He and his twin were unique individuals with unique flames. So unique that Sepira did not know either. The original Earth habitants had only seven types of flames. The people who might have answers now guard the arcobaleno pacifiers all around the clock, as told by Tsuna.

The first time he manifested his flames must be during his first training with Alaude. Back then, flames were exclusive to the Vongola, Mare and the Arcobaleno. Knowledge of them was limited.

Aku observed Alaude's cloud flames that had burst out of his ring.

"You need a strong motivation to light it up; hence, it's called a 'Dying will' flame," Giotto explained from a far corner of the training room. "No half-hearted wills-it must be a definite, focused feeling."

"Is it necessary to have a conduit?" Aku asked. Giotto's forehead sprouted his sky flames, though his fists were covered with his gloves. Daemon's spear would be lit with his mist flames. Alaude had his handcuffs and Lambo with his shield (though it looked more like a wok). Asari would have his swords and daggers, and G has his bow and arrows. The only odd one out is Knuckles, who seemed to be able to work without one.

Giotto contemplated the question and then shook his head. "Not really. However, the flames are easier to direct when there's one." He looked to a shorter individual to his left. "Talbot, is there a ring that he can use?"

The craftsman searched his pockets and his bag. "Do we know what is his type of flame?"

"I'm assuming he's a cloud because he is similar to Alaude, but something tells me otherwise."

Talbot frowned. Giotto's intuition is not to be questioned. Nevertheless, he might have just the tool, though it is not a ring. "I have a clear stone. Aku can inject his flames into it to see what they are. The stone will change its colour according to his flame type."

Aku shook his head. "No, that wouldn't be necessary. Giotto's reply is good enough." He concluded, "I don't believe it is necessary to use a ring. Looking back at all your guardians' choices of weapons, I think the conduit should be something I hold significant. As long as I know what I want and that I will 'die' for it, that's how I will manifest my flames, no?"

The navy-blue-haired man took out his magnifying glass from his back pocket.

Something unwavering, something sure. Those were what is needed for his flames to appear.

Aku closed his eyes and breathed out slowly. At first, it was just a small click, then woosh! Like a dam opening, he could feel his body thrumming with unknown power. He could then hear a gasp from Giotto and Talbot. He cracked open his left eye before they both shot open in surprise.

A dark blue flame coated his magnifying glass. There were sparkling white flickers in between, like stars in the dark blue night sky.

Ah... right. He remembered the reasoning. There was once he talked to the leader of the Vindice.

Turns out, his flames were a variant. They were not disguised like the snow flame, but like how night flames were born, they were born out of the desire to not die. Unlike the sky flames, night flames are born when people are at death's door. When they are in a to-die situation, they are born. Aku might have possessed some normal flames before, but due to his history of close deaths all the time, they became a night-variant flame. At first, they were nameless, but Giotto affectionately named them 'stars'.

When Altair's flames were discovered, Giotto named it after the moon, as his flame was like a mirror, reflecting whatever flame that came close to it. He could even reflect the sky, showing that he does have what it takes to be a leader.

Oddly, Altair's hair would turn silver, and Aku's sclera would turn black. No one knew why, but perhaps it was a small price to pay for such powerful flames.

Conan scratched his head at the memory. What about the rats that imploded?

It happened a few years after Altair died. He was hiding from the Vongola family somewhere in England. After Altair and Aku left, Ricardo decided to reform the famiglia-to become even stronger than the first generation - enough to defeat every other group so that what happened with the Corvino would never happen again. For some reason, that means purging all who disagreed, be it ex-members or current members.

The Vongola managed to find him there, and Ricardo was set on eliminating all who were against his ideals.

Aku ran into a back alley, making sure not to leave any trail of his flames. Unfortunately, they were the flame of guidance and tend to be visible even to the untrained eyes.

"STOP RUNNING!"

He remembered calling them stupid because no way is the pursued going to stop for the pursuer.

"WHY DOES HE WANT TO KILL ME ANYWAY? I LEFT!"

"YOU'RE A POTENTIAL ENEMY OF THE FAMILY. ALL SUSPICIOUS FELLOWS MUST BE ELIMINATED!"

Aku cursed at the nonsensical reason. Ricardo must have lost it, drowning in power.

He lied about the fact that he tested his flames on rats. Back then, he was fearing his life as he was getting chased. In that situation, it was "kill or be killed". Once, he wondered what would happen when stars die. He managed to inject his flames into them and watched his pursuers wither away into nothing.

He knew about Black Holes before it was even discovered.

Conan quickly pressed his hand against his chest, willing himself to calm down and breathe. Aku was part of the mafia, not Shinichi or Conan.

But, Shinichi or Conan is Aku's reincarnation.

The mental conflict was almost too much to bear. Altair-Kaito was not around to help, and his house's remaining occupants have no idea what was happening. Calling his cousin for help was not ideal either. Ran is too busy to help him now. With his head muddled and his eyes squeezed shut, he called out.

"Mum... help."

Not a second later, the library's door slammed open. Conan's first instinct was to flinch away from the sound. Then, a pair of warm, slender arms embraced him. She tucked him under her chin and rocked him back and forth, just like when he was a child.

"You're okay, Shin-chan. You're okay."

Her voice and the sweet smell of her perfume brought him immense relief.

It's not her. It's not her. Thank goodness it's not her.

His eyes felt hot. Tears threatened to fall, and Conan felt like a little boy again. Forget 'Aku', and forget the black organisation. He just wanted time to stop so he could stay in this moment.

Kudo Yukiko is not her.

"Thank you, Mum."