The Diary of the Butterfly

Child's Play

Child's Play

Knock knock I hear at the door,

I ask what it is that they are there for.

''For the time we always spend alone'' they say,

I don't like it but I let them in anyway.

I want them to go away,

But I feel that without them I'll go insane.

I want to ask how long they plan to stay,

And though I want the answer I know it will bring me pain.

With them nothing is ever the same,

I never see myself the same way,

And in my head there's always a little more rain.

I try to keep it together but it is hard,

Because I know soon everything I am accustomed to will be gone.

They aren't good for me but they are all I know,

I like to think that just maybe they are helping me grow.

When they leave, I know not what to do,

Because I have known sadness longer than the sky has the moon.

When they leave, I feel like a fool,

Because I am used to being anxious all afternoon.

When they leave paranoia stays and he is my only friend.

Finally, I can take a breath,

And though I can breathe I still have to wonder if the end is what is coming next.

I want the cycle to end,

I want to ask for help.

The signs of my struggle show but those who see them don't care enough to wish me well.

Knock knock they come again,

I'm too tired to argue so I let them in.

In the back of my mind I pray for the day that I will finally leave from this life full of sin.

I pray I will go to a land where everything is done to a rhythm,

And I will no longer need to suffer because there, happiness will simply be child's play.

TionaH🦋