blackpink one shots. (for your heart).

i'm coming home to you. (jensoo)

listen to forever yours by grayscale, if you want to cry even more. (also i know the music video is like completely different from this but this was my take of it when i first listened to it.)

also trigger warning for suicide. never mentioned but definitely implied.

enjoy.

Jisoo laid in bed staring at the blank ceiling, something she had been doing every night. Her thoughts going back to her mistakes. She could only breathe as she knew her eyes were watering, but no tears dared to come out. No tears would come out. No matter how much she tried. It had been years since she felt anything, yet she was still here breathing.

She moved her hand to the side of her reaching for something but was met with a cold bed. She closed her eyes wanting to feel warmth but nothing had come. Nothing had come for a while now. She should have known her mind was so deep in the gutter not even the thought of her brought warmth.

She missed her. Her breathing. Her touch. Her smile. Her laugh. Her eyes. Her lips. Her words. She just missed Jennie. All of her.

"Please, come back," Jisoo choked out but no one came. No matter how much Jisoo begged. No matter how many times she had cried for her. No matter how many times she had yelled for her. No matter how many times she laid in bed waiting for her to come hold her. 

No one came.

-

Jisoo seemed to just stay in their room, only going out to use the bathroom, to eat, to do daily errands. But to go out and live her life? Jisoo would rather stay home. She had felt safer in the comfort of their home. Well now her home, her bedroom, if she really wanted to be technical. 

However, she did write. Something she had found a bit of comfort in whenever she needed to feel something. Something she wanted to feel. Something she was getting desperate to feel.

She wrote her heart away, her feelings away, her thoughts away.

If someone were to ever come, all they would see is pages and pages of paper on the floor and all over the bed. Never to be picked up by Jisoo. Jisoo seemed to not care that her room was basically now being drowned with her words. Jisoo seemed to not care for a lot of things now.

All the papers seemed to be the same, they all had the same heading, Dear Jennie,  and they all had the same ending, Forever Yours, Jisoo.

The ring she was given had never left Jisoo's ring finger. Almost as if she had glued it on. The white dress hanging on the door never touched since the day she walked down the aisle to find everyone in tears.

If she were being honest with herself she never learned how to cope with the pain but writing to Jennie seemed to make everything okay. At least that's what she wanted to think after all.

But Jisoo knew better, she was not okay. She will never be okay, no matter how much she writes, no matter how long she waits, no matter how long she breathes.

She will never be okay.

-

Jisoo continued to write, writing about the day Jennie had given her hope for forever. Writing about all the promises Jennie had made to her. Writing about all the love she felt with Jennie. Writing about all the happiness she felt when with her.

At that moment she smiled.

It was the first time she had smiled. She smiled when she remembered Jennie confessing everything she was feeling, the nerves, the love, the happiness, the forever. She smiled remembering the promise Jennie had told her.