Colin Firth - will he save me?

something in between

Strange, I feel very easy. They must have given me some medication for this unspeakable pain. I only feel the pain very dully, it will certainly not last long before it is completely gone. If only this eternal fatigue was gone, I could sleep all the time. I have no idea why the birth of David bothered me so much, okay, with Matilda it wasn't exactly without pain, maybe I just suppressed the fact that a birth is very nice, but also very exhausting. But was I so terribly tired after Matilda's birth? Hm .. I'll probably get some sleep and think about it later.

Far away I can hear Colin's voice, he asks me if I want to eat something - no, it was something different. I find it difficult to understand. Is he suddenly yelling at me? What's happening? I can't open my eyes. Yeah, definitely, he's screaming to me that I should wake up. He shakes my body - hey what are you doing, I can feel you. He yells at Matteo to get a doctor. Why a doctor? I'm fine - or am I not?

I want to tell Colin to calm down that I'm fine. But I can't. I can't move my lips, my body stops responding. I feel that the room is suddenly getting restless - strange hands are tugging at me. A calm voice tells something about the placenta not having loosened completely and that I seem to have internal bleeding. They have to operate me immediately. I hear someone sob. Matilda! No, my little girl, everything will be fine. Mummy is fine. I'm not leaving you, I promised you that. Colin is talking to someone - quietly, I can't understand anything. Ah, I think he's touching me, holding my hand. Yes, it has to be that way. He tells me that he loves me, that I should fight, that I shouldn't leave him, that he couldn't stand it if something happened to me.

And now I understand that something is wrong. I get terrified. No, I don't want to die, I just found the love of my life and we have a wonderful baby. I want to be with them, I want to be in their midst again, laugh, cry, dance, be happy with them. I have to fight and get well so that I can be with them. And suddenly there is this white light again and Paul stands there and waits for me with outstretched arms. "Are you finally coming to me my sugar doll? I've been waiting for you long enough!" 

Yes, he's right. I walk up to him laughing ...