A Cry in the Park - A Bob's Burgers fanfic - by BobsBurgersStories1

A Cry in the Park

Chapter 1

Bob pinched his nose and sighed as his youngest daughter's high-pitched shriek rang through the little restaurant. He looked through the hatch and saw Louise running about with a mustard bottle in one hand, and a ketchup bottle in the other.

   "Death to the enemies!" she screamed, squirting Teddy in the back of the head with the mustard.

   "Louise, what are you doing?" he asked.

   "Playing Saving Private Ryan!" she answered, leaping up into a booth, and making machine gun noises as she squirted the condiment bottles in every direction.

   "Louise. Louise!" he called, causing her to pause and look at him. "You're getting ketchup and mustard everywhere!"

   "They're bullets, Dad," she told him.  

   "Have you ever actually seen Saving Private Ryan?" he asked. He was certain that she hadn't; both he and Linda tried to be pretty careful about what their children watched. Tina seemed to be content with her romantic comedies, while Gene loved his actions and musicals. Louise loved horror films, she had seen a few, but they had all been heavily edited.

   "No, but I know it's about soldiers!" she yelled, leaping off the booth, before rugby tackling Gene. 

   "Aaagh!" he screamed, immediately surrendering to the enemy, while Tina looked on and groaned. A customer in the end booth covered his ears, grimacing. The bell rang as a group of six entered the restaurant. They remained there for less than a second before Louise's screeching caused them to leave.

   "Oh, my God," Bob pinched his nose again. Louise hadn't been this hectic for a really long time, and he had no idea why she was suddenly acting like this again. "Louise," he looked back out the hatch, and saw her again running around. "Louise!" Once again, she stopped and looked at him. "Listen, we're almost out of buns," he said. "Why don't you do me a favour and go and get a couple of packets?"

   "What?"

   "I need buns," he repeated, holding out a twenty-dollar bill. "Can you go and get some for me?"

   "Your poor planning isn't my problem, Dad." 

   "It would really help me."

   "Yeah, I don't think so; I still need to take down the enemy."

   "You can keep the change." Before Bob could blink, the money was gone from his hand, and Louise was running to the door.

   "Later!" she called, letting the door close behind her. Bob sighed again, as Linda began cleaning the stains up.

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Louise wandered through Wharf Park, being careful to take her time. She was already imagining what she was going to buy with the change; there would be at least $16; she would be rich! She would probably be able to buy all of the chocolate in the shop.

An interesting blue and black bug caught her eye, and Louise strayed from the path, following it, wanting to poke it.

When the bug disappeared, Louise shrugged, and continued walking slowly through the park, focused on nothing except all the chocolate she was going to buy.

   "Well, well, well," came a voice to her left, causing her to look over and saw Logan standing near a tree. He placed his phone in his pocket and walked over to her. "If it isn't little cry baby Four Ears."