The Parallels (Larry Stylinson+Niall Horan)

Chapter 11

Harry

I was getting dressed and going back and forth in my room to collect all my stuff for school. It was Friday today and Niall was supposed to come pick me up. Fridays were always my favourite because they signified ‘no school’ for the next two days. Also, Friday nights are the only exciting event for me in the whole week as Niall, Zayn and I have sleepovers and we take turns to decide whose house we’ll stay in. It was Zayn’s turn today. Liam used to be a pretty permanent member of our sleepovers but ever since Louis, he’s been missing almost all of them. That bothered me too much in the beginning but, it’s been two years now and I’ve learnt to live with it.

I always felt happier on Friday mornings compared to the other days. Today too, my heart felt lighter as I completed packing my bag. There were a few habits of mine that were to take place everyday. If there was a change in my routine, I’d start freaking out and I would feel anxious all day. So, like every time, I went to take a look in the mirror. My mother wasn’t home today. Sometimes she had the night shift and would return only after I left for school. She worked very hard to sustain me and my sister. Gemma also had a job in North Yorkshire, where she went to Uni and managed to pay almost all of her fees. However, I had no job and could not contribute financially.

I stood there in front of the mirror in my room. It was a full size mirror and I mostly used it to examine my outfit and style my hair even though I never put a lot of effort into them. As I studied my appearance too deeply, a cold shiver ran down my spine. The feeling of terror started creeping up throughout my body. Once again, I felt frozen. My feet felt stuck to the ground below me. I touched me cheeks gently and ran my hands further down my neck and arms. My body was extremely cold but it wasn’t because of the chilly November winds, it was because of the horror that I was feeling. Tears started welling up in my eyes and my vision started going blurry.

When a few seconds had passed, with the amount of tears in both of my eyes, I could barely see anything, any more. As the reality started to fade, my visions began to grow stronger. I could feel those rough hands crawling on my skin and holding me firmly, the tight grip hurting me and making impressions on my pale skin. The little squeaks, that were never loud enough, escaping my mouth. I was being shaken so hard that the world would look like a combination of blurred colours. I would feel dizzy and could barely even stand on my own. Then, as these thoughts would be crossing my mind in a haste, I’d be pushed against the wall of the living room so vigorously that I felt as if my skull would get displaced and every single bone in my back would get broken. The pain prickling through my skin making me scream but it wasn’t enough to make him stop. He would then, pull me forward and slap me hard across the face. The tears would start burning my cheeks by now. I started to lose any sense of the line between my thoughts and the reality. I could not tell if this was actually happening right now or it was all just in my head.

My head started to hurt severely and it felt like someone was continuously stabbing my chest. Hot tears were running down my face as I started to scream and shout. I went over to the side table near my bed and threw the bronze vase all across the room. I couldn’t make out anything. Everything in my brain felt like a mess. I could feel my heartbeat increasing and my heavy breathing sounded very loud. My hands were in my curls and I was holding onto my hair so hard that it seemed as if some of them would come out. I started scratching my head and my arms, my nails dug deep into my skin making impressions, I bit my lips in order to conceal the cries that escaped them every second but it was no use. The only thing that resulted into, was a metallic taste due to my bleeding lips.

I could hear a faint noise of a horn but my brain was not processing anything. I continued to cry and scream as I threw things all over the place. I hate to keep my room dirty but right now, I was not acting in my senses. I heard someone knocking the door and then came Niall’s voice.

“Harry, where are you?”

I didn’t respond. All I did was throw a punch at the wall and I let out a whimper as the pain shot up in my arm. The pounding on the door was growing louder by the second.

“Harry! What’s happening? Open the door, please, H.” It was Zayn this time.

I wouldn’t have done anything had the pounding and shouting of the two boys not been hurting my head worse. So, I decided to go down and open the door. I almost slipped on the stairs twice, because I still couldn’t see properly through the tears. My knees almost gave away but I somehow managed to get to the door. As soon as I opened the door, I fell. I couldn’t stand any more but Niall immediately came forward and held me, breaking my fall.

“H, what’s wrong? What happened?” He sounded extremely worried and surprised. At once, Zayn came behind me and carried me to the couch. Once I was sitting, he hugged me tightly and did not say a word. Niall went silent, too. The only sound that could be heard, was my little of my little whimpers. I started crying even harder now because I felt safe in Zayn’s arms which made me feel even more sensitive.

He was continuously rubbing and patting my back as Niall ran his fingers through my curls. I usually didn’t like when someone did that but in this moment, it felt comfortable. Zayn slowly kissed my head and then held my face up, wiping my tears away.

“Harry, look at me. Tell me what’s wrong, okay?” he said patiently.

“I.... I’m scared.” I hiccuped.

“What are you scared of, Harry? We are here now. Nothing and no one can harm you when you’re with us. You know that, right?” His voice was so gentle that it made me want to cry and smile at the same time. But, I was too upset and shaken to be able to manage a smile.

“Yes” I replied, weakly.

“Harry, it’s okay. We’re not gonna leave you now. Let’s get you to freshen up and then talk further, okay?”

“Yeah. I’ll be back.” I did not feel like I wanted to talk about things but, I stood up and went to the kitchen sink to wash my face.

“What do you think happened, Z?” I heard Niall ask.

“I don’t know but it’s most probably one of those visions or nightmares he has. Whatever it is, he’s not feeling good and we need to do something about it.” Zayn’s voice was especially deep and he seemed to be in serious thought.

When I stepped back into the living room, both of them looked up at me and jumped from their seats.

“Harry, I was thinking what if all three of us stay at home today?” Zayn asked.

I did not reply instantly. I did not know what I wanted. Did I want my friends to miss a whole day at school just so they could take care of me? How long will it have to be like this? How long will I let them feel sorry about me? I wanted to be stronger but I was not. I wanted to be someone who could take care of himself, who could move on from the past but I was not. I could not decide what to say to my best friends who were looking so eager yet patient as their eyes were constantly wandering on me.

“I don’t know. You shouldn’t have to miss school.” I said, avoiding any eye contact with the either of them.

“H, school is not more important than you. We care about you. How can we just let you walk into the school like you’re alright? What if something happens when we’re in different classes? All, we want is to stay near you, Haz.” Niall said.

“I know but-”

“There is no space for any if and but, Harry! We’re staying.” Zayn said firmly and then switched the television on, as if to prove his point.

“Yup!” Niall sat down, too.

In this moment, when I was standing behind my two best friends who were pretending to watch the program that they had no idea, whatsoever about, I felt grateful to have them but I could not say that I felt good about myself. Niall and Zayn have always been so supportive but how long was I gonna be one of the sympathetic cases? I needed to grow up and I wanted to be as fun as my friends were but I was just not like them. I was different and I couldn’t say it was a good thing.  I sat down on the beanbag near the couch, having no idea about how I felt in that very moment so, I just took a deep breath and closed my eyes.

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I'm sorry for taking so much time to update but on the brighter side, both of my chapters are more than x1.5 times longer than I usually write, so, I hope you like em. Happy reading✌🏻.