Uhh oops

Team red. Why.

The next day, he'll was about to come and I actually managed a good three fucking hours of sleep. Goose came into my room and I stared at him, he stared at me. Then he meowed and crawled into my book bag. I had a revelation and jumped out of bed. I did my mourning routine quickly and then ran to the kitchen with goose in my back pack.

"Oh shit-uh hi auntie Carol! I'm not hungry so, I'm gonna run!" I yelled and bolted out the door, and into the elevator.

I ran to school and ran up to the gang. "You'll never believe it." I whispered. They looked on the edge of their seats. "What what what??" Miles asked. I smiled and brought my book bag around to my chest. 

I opened it slightly and they gasped when they saw who was inside. "It's the octopus cat!" Nate said. We all laughed and I nodded. 

"Auntie Carol doesn't know yet-" my phone started to fucking ring.

Oh fuck me. No wait, I need to fuck Loki first-

"Hey! Dad!"

"Do you know where goose is?"

"H-huh? Nope,no way, oh no class is starting, gotta go!" I yelled and hung up. I was hyperventilating and the gang was laughing. 

I was dragged to the classroom and I sat down with everyone. I pet goose, and fed him some of the snacks i had in my book bag as I semi-listened to the lectures. It was around fourth period when I got a text on my phone that made me freeze.

                                                                                     Chimichanga Man

Hey Petie pie!

Spooderman

No

Chimichanga Man

What? You didnt even know what I was going to say!

Spooderman

I don't need to. No.

Chimichanga Man

So I came all the way to your school for nothing?

I yelped, but covered it up with a violent cough. "What happened?" Lila whispered. I showed her my texts and she covered her mouth to stop herself from laughing.

The windows broke and I groaned, quickly securing goose in the bag.

"DeadPool. No." I demanded. He laughed loudly and picked me up by the back of the collar. "Byeeee." I waved before zooming out the window. "Fuck you." I said. He laughed. "Like you were having fun there anyways!" He yelled. I nodded in agreement and we started running across rooftops. I fell somewhere and took it as a time to get changed into my suit. 

"Alright! back in action!" Wade yelled. I sighed and groaned as I was hunched over his shoulder. We stopped at the restaurant that wade and I like. "Daredevil will be joining us soon." Wade said, and the door opened. "Team red back in action!" He yelled. I groaned and face-palmed.

"Freeze! Hands in the air!" Some robber said. He turned to us and growled, not even being afraid of our presence.

Respect.

"Give us all your money in the register! It's either that or the red guys over there come with us!" He yelled. We all looked at each other and shrugged.

"I've got time before I have to be home." I said. Wade and Daredevil laughed and nodded. We all put our hands out willingly and we were taken to a white van. 

"Oooh! Got any candy back here?"I asked as we were shoved in. "Shut it!" The man yelled. We all opened our hands and shut our fingers over and over again to Mimi I talking.

"It looks like a potato flew around your van before we came." Wade sang.

"I'm a lesbian." I said. "i thought you were American." Daredevil finished. we all laughed loudly. "Look at all those chickens!" wade yelled.

"is that a puppy?"

"baby changing station. baby hanging station."

"i mean four female ghost busters?" i asked in shock. "the feminists are taking over." daredevil said. "Im An AdUlT vIrGiN." wade finished.

the kidnapper banged on the doors. "shut it!" he yelled as we pulled into the abandoned place. we were dragged into the biding by more people.

"AYE! watch you fingers bootyhole man!" team red yelled in sync. 

"can i have one of those chicken strips?" wade asked hopefully at a man who was eating chicken nuggets from mcdonalds.

"FUCK YOUR CHICKEN STRIPS!" i yelled and team red burst into laughter.

"be quiet all of you! you were kidnapped!" the main guy yelled. we just ignored him, i mean...we're on a roll. 

"Happy birthday Raven!" wade yelled. "...i cant swim." daredevil finished.

"miss kisha! miss kisha! miss kisha!! oh my fucking gawd she fuckin dead." i said. everyone who ahd kisnapped us took a step back. 

"and they were roommates!" daredevil said. "oh my gawd and they were roommates." i said. team red laughed even more and the kidnappers were getting impatient.

"we could kill you at any moment!" somebody yelled. team red was planned for this.

"thats not true. according to the encyclopediea of oavnqprwoifnqufh." wade siad.

i decided to break it, so sad.

"yeah, anypne could do that. a horse...a boat, fuck it even an ambitus DuCk could kill me. you're not special." i said.

"alright back in the van." somebody said, grabbing me. we were hauled into the back and goose sat there, licking his paws. "theres a cat in here!" one yelled. team red was, also ready for this. "mother flerkin!" we yelled. 

goose's head tilted up and he ate one of the members. they dropped us in shock and yeeted us into the van. "where the fuck do you live?" teh man in the driver's seat yelled. "stark towers will do!" i yelled back up at him.

he didnt question us, he just rushed to the tower. tony was there, a worried dadTM, at the front of ST. 

"i am so sorry for kidnapping your demons, but his cat ate my friend and i kind of need him back, i am willing to go to jail as long as i never see any of them again."

literally got the chapter done in half an hour. thanks EvilFlowey for the chapter idea!