𝑶𝒖𝒓 𝑶𝒏𝒆 𝑫𝒂𝒚 | ✔

Chapter 53

*Erin's POV*

"Urgh." When I woke up my head was pounding.
"Good morning to you aswell." Jay sat next to my bed.
As I looked around I saw tubes coming in and out of my arm.
"You were poisoned by alcohol." Jay realized that I was confused.
"Have I been drinking that much?" Jay got up and walked away. I knew I had hurt him by seeing Bunny.
"No. What makes you think that?" He snapped back at me.
"Jay. I didn't mean to over do it." I saw tears in his eyes and I couldn't quite place what he was feeling.
"I know you didn't. Or honestly, with all due respect, Erin, I don't know. It wasn't the first time, and it probably won't be the last. We both know that you let Bunny manipulate you like no one else can manipulate you." I wanted to answer him, but his words hit me hard.
"She didn't manipulat me." I didn't know if that was the truth or if it was a lie, because my memories of yesterday were rather blurry.
"I see. So you grabbed the bottle and dumped it all so you could forget our fight?" Jay's voice trembled because he was so angry and it scared me a little because he had never spoken to me in that tone.
But he was right somewhere, I couldn't remember that we had a fight.
"How should this go on with you? We have a damn daughter, Erin! You told me before you became pregnant that you didn't want to end up like Bunny because you didn't want your child to grow up the way you did. For my taste you are not far from becoming like your mother if you carry on like this! Why are you doing this?" A tear ran down my cheek and I hadn't even noticed my eyes getting wet.
"Damn it, give me an answer!" Jay was standing in front of my bed and I winced when he raised his hand but then just ran it through his hair.
"The don't say anything." He walked towards the wall, but thought again for a moment before crashing his fist into the hospital wall.
"I'm sorry." Jay didn't look at me.
"Now you are sorry. Do you even notice the consequences of your actions? Erin, you're no longer a teenager for whom Voight arranges everything. What would you have done if I hadn't found you, huh? Not much I guess because you would still be laying on the floor. Probably choked on your vomit." Jay had his hair messed up from running his hands through it.

*Jay's POV*

I was taking out all my despair and anger about everything on Erin.
I hadn't missed the way she winced when I had raised my hand.
"My mother would have called an ambulance." I didn't know if Erin really believed it, or if this was the protective mechanism for her mother speaking again.
"Don't you understand or don't you want to understand it? This woman has nothing for you. She uses you! And you fall for it." Erin was shaking and I realized that I had already said too much that I would never have said under normal circumstances.
So I left the room without saying another word, just to run into my brother who was standing in front of the door.
"Jay." He pulled me into an adjoining room.
"It's one thing when you have an argument with your wife, it happens in the best of marriages, but not here in the hospital, not when she nearly died, and not when you yell at her like that. If I go in there now; Is she crying? Is she trembling?" Will gave me a long look and I didn't answer him.
"You are like him." I froze because I knew exactly who he was talking about.
"Don't dare to say that." I stood right in front of my brother and looked into his eyes.
"But our father did the same. He yelled at mom. She cried and trembled, then he hit her. You did the same thing except hitting." Will looked at me, not ducking fast enough from my fist, which hit him at the eyebrow.
"Now I'm just like him." I left the room and with one last look at Will I saw blood running down his face.
"I think Dr Halstead hit his head and needs some stitches." I talked to a nurse for a moment and then left.

*Erin's POV*

"Hey there. Jay told me to check in on you." Hailey came into the room and sat down on a chair.
"Is he too good to come by himself or what?" I was happy that Hailey was here, but found it pathetic of Jay to first yell at me and then not come.
"Actually, he's at the door and just wanted to make sure he doesn't scare you when he walks in, but I'll go tell him you don't want to see him yet." Upton got up.
"No wait. You can tell him to come in. I really appreciate you swinging by but would you mind giving us a little time?" Hailey nodded and then left.
"Hey." Jay sounded a little meek, the complete opposite of how he had left.
"Do you mind?" He pointed to the chair where Hailey had just been sitting and when I shook my head Jay pulled the chair over.
"Can i say something first?" I asked because I knew that I owed him an explanation.
"Yeah. Course." Jay shot me a short smile but didn't touch me.
"First of all; I'm sorry. What I've done was wrong in every way possible. I should never have gotten so drunk, especially not if nobody knew where I was and I when my mother was around. You're right, she's manipulating me and I just don't want to see it. Can you forgive me again for what I said I was just upset and don't even know why I went to see my mother in the first place. If I said something to you before that hurt you, I'm terribly sorry, but I can't remember the fight we had." At Jay's expression I saw that I must have said something that had hurt him terribly.
"Jay what did I say?" My voice trembled when I saw a tear roll down his cheek.
"I don't know the exact words anymore, but I think basically you told me that you think I'm jealous that you have a mother and I don't anymore." I knew how hard his mother's death still hit him.
"I'm so sorry. I didn't mean what I said." My voice was a whisper because I could barely push it past the lump in my throat.
"I know you didn't mean it that way. I also have to apologize to you for yelling at you earlier, that wasn't right at all and I'll never hit you. I want you to know that. You don't have to be afraid if I raise my hand." So he had seen my wincing after all.
"I was yelling around earlier because I was so scared of losing you. I love you and I'm not ready to lose you just yet. I guess I'll never be." My hands were shaking.
I felt horrible for what I had put Jay through without really realizing.
"Don't apologise. It's alright. We're good." I took his hand and he squeezed mine.
At the point where he touched me, I felt a pleasant tingling sensation and I calmed down immediately.
"Jay I love you too. So much." I leaned my head on his shoulder and he stroked my head.
Everything was okay between us for now, but I knew that this wasn't the end and we would get back to the conversation at some point.

I'm sorry I haven't updated in the past few days, but my teachers seem to like it when I have to give a presentation every day.
That's why I don't got much time to write, but this chapter is a bit longer than usual as a compensation.
Hope you like it.