joke collection :)

jokes 13

*the group at a campfire*

Itzza: haha, okay, my turn! chatnoob2, i dare you to prank call your dad!

chatnoob2: thats all? ha, okay...

chatnoob2: siri, call "dad".

siri: okay, calling "daddy"

chatnoob2: WAIT NO SIRI CANCEL-

*saltyNate's phone rings*

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kidnapper: i have your friend! pay *insert obscene amount of money* to have her back!

chatnoob2: i know. Youre parked in front of the starbucks at James Snow parkway, holding her hostage in a black honda civic with the license plate number FHRT 492, parked two spaces from the left. i can tell you your social security number, email PIN, house address, and immediate family members right now. are you sure you would like to play this game?

kidnapper: wha-

chatnoob2: oh, and you're wrong. you don't have her, she has you.

kidnapper: *incoherent screaming*

chatnoob2: heh. thats my bff

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Itzza: i still remember the coke you stole from me.

simplii: and i still remember the five inches of hair you owe me.

Itzza: i traded those off for other things.

simplii: ill buy you a coke if you cut off five inches.

Itzza: no.

simplii: damn it!

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TurtleKnight: will you accept five free KFC coupons?

prison guards: ....

TurtleKnight: i have a pair of mildly used socks too!

prison guards: thats a tempting offer, kid, but you're in here for a reason.

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simplii: TURTLEKNIGHT

TurtleKnight, thinking: oh no she doesn't sound happy. play dumb!

TurtleKnight: who's TurtleKnight?

TurtleKnight, thinking: not that dumb!

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Itzza: you stupid, useless piece of crap!

simplii: thats a little harsh to say to chatnoob2, isnt it?

Itzza: its perfectly fine by my expectations.

simplii: well then what's not fine by your expectations?

Itzza: *censored*

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simplii: what has chatnoob2 ever done to me?

TurtleKnight: well-

simplii: don't answer that

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saltyNate: better off sad than dead.

TurtleKnight, Itzza, and simplii raise fingers to say something: well-

TurtleKnight, Itzza, and simplii lower their fingers: never mind.

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simplii: did you lose my flower pressing?

chatnoob2: yes

Itzza: no

TurtleKnight: no

saltyNate: yes

simplii: what? DID you lose my flower pressing?

chatnoob2: no

Itzza: yes

TurtleKnight: yes

saltyNate: no

simplii: yall are dead.

TurtleKnight: shes psychic or something, how the frick does she know?

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yes i am psychic

so my promise to write another one write away flew out the window tbh

well whatever

hope you had a good time reading