joke collection :)

jokes 16

oh holy crap this hasnt been updated in ages Itzza and TurtleKnight's gonna scream at me

________________________________________________________________________________

kfc worker: breast or thigh?

Itzza: PERSONALITY.

worker: ???

________________________________________________________________________________

*Itzza packing bags to move*

TurtleKnight: ill miss you.

simplii: ill miss you too.

chatnoob2: i wont forget you.

*all stare at saltyNate*

saltyNate: dont stare at me, im here because my mom made me come.

________________________________________________________________________________

TurtleKnight: hey guys! i made cross country!

*guys stare*

Itzza: do you think-

saltyNate: yeah, no.

________________________________________________________________________________

*chatnoob2 walks up to vending machine*

*chatnoob2 stares in disbelief at display*

TurtleKnight: do you hear... the sounds of inhumane torture?

simplii: the vending machine must have run out of choco pies again.

________________________________________________________________________________

the ogs fishing:

simplii: *stays inhumanely quiet waiting for a catch, has five fish in bucket*

Itzza: *sitting, listening to spotify, has three fish in bucket*

chatnoob2: *talking to simplii and trying to decide how she'll grill these things, has six fish in bucket*

TurtleKnight: *hanging upside down from a tree with no fish* do you think stars have feelings

saltyNate: DIE FISH, DIE *has four fish in bucket*

________________________________________________________________________________

the ogs playing manhunt in a park:

simplii: super evasive, wandering around and looking behind her way too often, gets caught anyway

Itzza: caught, looking for people

saltyNate: wins because hes so fast

TurtleKnight: caught, lying facedown in some random place

chatnoob2: wandering around, not playing, just watching

________________________________________________________________________________

the ogs playing manhunt in a forest:

simplii: hiding in the brush, does not come out until 15-20 minutes after game ends, wins

TurtleKnight: doing the same thing as simplii

Itzza: wandering around, running when he hears voices

saltyNate: cursing a lot, trying not to get lost

chatnoob2: leaning against a tree, hyperventilating

________________________________________________________________________________

Itzza to TurtleKnight and simplii: romeo and juliet!

TurtleKnight: *runs away*

simplii: you do know juliet commits suicide at the end of the play right

TurtleKnight, from far away: SO DOES ROMEO

________________________________________________________________________________

Itzza: simplii-and-TurtleKnight-sitting-in-a-tree

simplii: Itzza-please-get-away-from-me

Itzza: first comes love, then comes marriage

simplii: then Itzza with spinal damage

________________________________________________________________________________

*the ogs at a slumber party*

*the ogs wake up to odd noises, walks around until they find simplii in a party hat*

chatnoob2: what are you doing?

simplii: celebrating the death of my dear sanity and sleep schedule! also, i made cake! want some?

*the boys already putting on party hats and eating slices of cake*

chatnoob2: *facepalms* not again

________________________________________________________________________________

*the ogs at a slumber party*

*after a while*

TurtleKnight: if you work at a farm and take care of the chickens, are you a chicken tender?

simplii: if you eat an egg, are you technically eating an unborn baby?

Itzza: we can never make it to heaven, since squashing a bug counts as taking a life.

*the other two groan*

chatnoob2: guys we cant all operate on no sleep like you three

________________________________________________________________________________

waiter: so how can i help you today?

TurtleKnight, Itzza, and saltyNate: WE WISH TO DEVOUR THE UNBORN

waiter: *thoroughly shook*

simplii: *facepalms* they want eggs

chatnoob2: boys am i right

________________________________________________________________________________

chatnoob2: wow, last night i only slept for six hours!

saltyNate: ha, well, i slept for three!

TurtleKnight: huh, i didnt sleep at all!

Itzza: *stumbles into the room, pours coffee grounds into his mouth, then pours in water* what year is it

________________________________________________________________________________

im so sorry i did not update all summer

ps itzza actually did move