Reaper: Devil's Rose MC #1

Chapter 22: Fiona Grace

I know what it's like to have your feelings hurt by a boy. Most people who have ever dated know what it's like to be heartbroken by any gender, but with my personal experience, boys have always been the way to ruin your life. 

What I really was looking for, and wouldn't find it in them, would be a man. I think I've found that in certain parts of Madoc. Of course, we are all works in progress, always evolving, but he is a good man. I just know it. It might take a little while to come out, but he can do it. But will he tell me about his ex? Is he going to let me in for more details on his childhood? 

I hope he's more open with me than my non-biological father was. And with that unspoken statement, it hits me. This isn't about Madoc at all. Or him becoming a more open person. It has nothing to do with him controlling his temper or telling me every single thing about him. It's about me and my father.

Ever since I've shown up, I have been trying to help him become a better man, one who doesn't allow himself to make terrible decisions. I've been trying to help him control himself, to be more compassionate to people. And he's incredibly kind and warm to me, but it's other people he has a hard time with. 

But I'm realizing it's wrong of me. It's wrong of me to assume that wants to change, that he needs to change, and that he wants me to be the one to do anything about anything. It's wrong of me to change him, even with good intentions. He is who he is. I've been fighting my own self and that rolled onto him, and that was wrong of me. 

My own insecurities and hatred towards who I am at points in my life has come out in trying to redesign someone else. I'm growing to appreciate the strong, determined, beautiful, caring, stubborn woman I am. But it doesn't happen overnight. Nothing does.

There are a lot of things I shouldn't have done to Madoc because he doesn't need pressure from me to be someone he's not. Sure, he doesn't have to go around killing guilty people and endangering lives in the process. What he doesn't need to do is fix who he is. I've been pretending I know what's best for him when I don't. 

I've been projecting the openness I wanted with my father onto him when I shouldn't have. He has nothing to do with the lies I was told, nothing to do with the turbulent relationships I have had in my life with my family. I can't continue to treat him like I do. 

He's a human being who has flaws, flaws with good intentions and a beautiful protective nature. It was so wrong of me to say that I was understanding his need for space because I was lying. I was not understanding or listening to his needs. I was being selfish. 

So much to apologize for and not enough time to do it.

"Hey, Fiona. Are you okay?"

I didn't even realize that Madoc had dropped me off at the bar. But the four girls look concerned about me.

"I'm going to be."

"Are you sure? 'Cause you are crying."

I reach up and touch my face to find that my cheeks are wet with tears. That's so weird. I didn't comprehend that I was - am - crying. I quickly brush the droplets away from my face, much to the girls' concern.

"I swear I'm good. How long has Reaper been gone?"

"About four hours."

"Four hours. I was zoned out for a while."

"Not really, just the past few minutes."

"Thank you."

I ignore the rest of the conversation before I hear them chatting about me again.

"Have you seen the way he looks at her?"

"Scarlett, you are talking about me like I'm not here."

"You should have seen what she was wearing yesterday. That's actually what she's been wearing for days now."

"What?!"

"His t-shirt and pair of panties!"

"What about panties?"

His rumbling, deep, silky voice sends shivers down my spine. His muscular chest presses onto my back as he stands behind me. A rough hand comes to rest on the space that connects my neck and shoulder. Reese subtly wiggles her eyebrows at me, making me blush all over again. The beat in my chest rapidly increases as he crouches down to my height, his lips lingering at my ear.

"Come with me."

My breath hitches at his words, my mouth drying in thick anticipation. One hand pushes on the small of my back, and I stand ungracefully, almost falling back onto my butt as my legs wobble. I can see the girls trying not to laugh, and the delicious devil smirk present on Madoc's face doesn't help my embarrassment. 

He wraps a sturdy arm around my waist, tugging me closer to his bulky body. I rest a hand on his chest as he leads me away from my friends. Those girls, although they are all good gossips, are nice to have around. The three of them didn't know each other that well in the UC but had seen each other. 

Since we are all new additions to the group, no one feels left out, and we all want to take care of one another. There is no reason not to...yet. That's why I think Teagan was being cautious about Reaper, not the Madoc I know. But, they have nothing to worry about. Obviously.

Multiple times I ask where we are going or what we are doing, but I - unsurprisingly - get no direct answer. A warm breeze ruffles my hair, forcing it to fly directly into his mouth as he talks softly to me. I erupt into giggles while he tries to remove my golden brown locks from his lips. 

He grimaces at me, taking the hair tie off my wrist, and pulling my hair into a braid. He mumbles 'better' before tugging me back to his side. Once we are standing outside his home, he places me in front of him, his hands landing delicately on my hips. 

He grazes his lips on my neck, his tongue even getting a taste, and drives his pelvis forward. I avoid letting out a guttural moan from between my lips, but I can't possibly help pressing my butt on his body. His chest vibrates with the husky rumble making me smile at the funny sensation.

He gently nudges me to walk forward, a land lifting from my waist to drop down onto the back of my neck. I take slow steps into our home. My nerves send my hands shaking, but with a comforting touch, Madoc calms them. 

He assures me that it's nothing to be afraid of, though that doesn't change my overthinking mind. He continues guiding me into the apartment, the feeling of relief and comfort rushing through me. 

No one can get me here. I am more protected here than anywhere else on this entire earth. He caresses my neck with his thumb, relaxing me even more. And when we are finally fully inside, I cannot believe what I see.

Dinner. He made dinner.

My mouth drops open, my cheeks flushing red at the surprise. The table is set with burning candles, a variety of fruit, two glasses of white wine, and a large slab of some meat that I'm guessing is chicken. I turn to him to give him a surprise kiss to the jawline, which he greatly adores. 

His deep chuckle radiates throughout the room as I squeal in happiness at the gorgeous meal. However, one thing that catches me off guard is the fact that there is only one chair. I glance back at him incredulously to watch the smirk become plastered onto his face. 

My heart skips a beat as he saunters to the chair, sitting down with his legs partly spread. He pats his lap with ease and flicks his pointer finger in an unspoken command. I don't even try to fight it, my body drifting in his direction. I sit over his lap backward, my front facing the incredible table of food.