2.1.53

Chapter Fifteen: First Sight

I kept on looking at the paperweight unable to fixate on a decision. The man sitting on the other side of the table waited patiently for my answer and my mind was stuck between compromising and losing another opportunity.

"See son! I know you have potential. I know you can be a great author and the money isn't too much for your dreams" the man said.

I was sitting in the editor's office and after a hefty amount of appreciation came the 'but' of the equation. They offered the same things I was offered earlier in the morning, but the required money for publishing my unchanged story was lesser than what I was offered before.

"It's just 30 thousand bucks" He mentioned the figure again, twenty thousand less than what others were asking for.

The savings in my bank account accounted nowhere close to it. I can't even ask my mom for the money, the little amount she earns from her small shop mostly went into dad's medical bills and the marketing job I was doing hardly paid for my expenses in the city.

"Can I think about it for a few days and let you know?" I asked.

"We would require an answer and a money deposit within 72 hours" He said.

The time frame was narrow, my mind was bombarded by questions about the money. I kept on looking at the paperweight. Everything comes at a cost and I thought my hard work and sleepless nights of working a story was enough to compensate but it wasn't.

I knew I had one last resort, selling the car. But I didn't want to do that. I remember the day I was shifting to the city from back home. Dad was on his bed and he called me and told me to sit down.

"You know my father once said" He said to me, "That the one that you should keep sacrificing for is your dream and when it demands your loved ones sacrifice the dream"

Those lines etched into me after that. I built myself around a shield protecting my dreams, cut myself off from emotional attachments. Using girls for a short-term affair and then dumping them, declining good job offers and surviving on low income just to fulfill my dream. But it wasn't worth sacrificing the one thing Dad loved and passed on to me.

"I have made my decision" I said.

"Great. So?" the man hunched forward, eager to know.

"I am sorry but I won't be able to pay. I don't have enough and I can never manage enough. I thank you for your time" I said and stood up to leave.

He stood up with me

"Declining two offers in a day. Yes, I know you declined another company today and that's why I suggested a lesser fee than what they suggested" He adjusted his suit, "Aren't you being a little cocky?"

I smiled and thanked him again and I was out of the office and into the elevator before I even got time to think. I was afraid of second doubts so I didn't allow myself to. I waited for the slow elevator to descend which seemed even slower from the first time.

When I reached the lobby, Prinita was sitting there hunched into the tablet screen sitting on her lap, scribbling lines into a painting. She changed her top into a greyish one, her hair was tied into a bun.

I went on silent foot and sat next to her which startled her a bit. She looked at me with anticipating eyes and I shook my head to tell her about the rejection.

"Same old shit?" She asked.

"They suggested less money but it was still much more than what I could afford"

"Hmmm" She fell silent.

I sighed and threw my head behind and closed my eyes.

"Would you mind if I suggest you something?" She asked.