1984 | choi chanhee ♫

CHAPTER TWENTY FIVE

Y/N POV

With everyday that passed we didn't talk or even dare utter a word to each other: tense mealtimes and sour side eyes across rooms. Throwing my plate into the kitchen sink after dinner, I happened to swipe a knife blade amongst the soapy water in the basin. With a hiss, I took my damp hand out and winced at the dark crimson leaking out. It was a deep slash to the top of my index finger, stinging as the soap bubbles gathered around it.

"Oh my god." Somebody gasped lowly from behind me, Chanhee grabbed my wrist and ran it under the fresh faucet water. The familiar warmth he radiated felt as if it was trying to blow my heart into smithereens. "Do you have any band aids?" He asked grazing over the deepened cut gently.
"In the medication cupboard in the top right." I replied, glancing over as he found the box and reached it down swiftly.
"You nearly took your finger off." He voiced his concern as he dried off my hand, sticking the band aid over it precisely
"It was nothing." I rolled my eyes, snatching my hand away from him bluntly.
"I won't help you next time then." Chanhee bitterly replied, muttering to himself as he left the kitchen.

——

Night had fell upon us again, I was readily in my nightwear and alone in my room once again. Through the open window, I childishly dangled my legs out with miserable swings feeling the cold air batter my bare skin over the edge.

"Well isn't this mysterious?" A deeper voice startled me, hastily turning to see Juyeon leisurely knelt on my bed behind me.
"Move over." He gestured for me to shuffle over, leaving some space for him to climb on to the ledge. "May I ask what's with you dangling out the second floor of a building?" He looked at me strangely with a chuckle, trying to ease away the awkwardness we forced upon ourselves.
"Just... Thinking." I shrugged emptily, not looking up at him but instead at the ground below.
"I hope not about jumping down there." He chuckled, waving a hand in front of me to take my gaze off the cement below.
"No,no." I laughed nervously, pushing me hair out the way to look at him. "I just needed the fresh air."

There was a short silence between us, Juyeon and I hadn't properly talked since the incident either. It was clearly still awkward, from the way we both gazed around cluelessly.
"So-" "So-" We both began at the same time, causing us to laugh idiotically at the cringeworthy moment.
"We can't keep going like this." I choked out during my laughter, Juyeon nodded in agreement.
"Hug it out?" He opened his arms, whilst I sarcastically opened my own. Letting him embrace me, it was definitely a hug between two friends - from which I determined I had no feelings for Juyeon Lee. However, I probably would, if I didn't for someone else.

"Do you think we actually did-" I asked softly, causing us both to laugh momentarily.
"Yeah, I think we did." Juyeon replied with a hearty laugh, before pulling away from the hug as I did.
"How do you know-" I looked at him with slight alarm as he climbed out of my window.
"I wasn't going to tell you this but Hyunjae confirmed and he wouldn't disclose why he knows. I also would like to save my dignity from whatever it is, so let's pretend it never happened." He shook his head with a stifled laugh, pushing down the door handle and laughing as I smacked my head in my hands.
"You're joking." I laughed in shock.
"Unfortunately not." He winced, still giggling as he opened the door ajar. "Goodnight Y/N."
"Goodnight Juyeon." I smiled back to him as he left.

Pulling my legs out of the window, I climbed back into my sheets with a bittersweet sigh. My window displayed a direct view of the moonlight, the stars glistening like tiny little crystals leaping out of their navy blanket. A soft knock at my door shifted my attention to the emulsion coated mahogany wood as it creaked open slightly.

"Can I come in?" A familiar voice asked, knowing who it was I sat up curiously against my headboard.
"Yeah." I hesitantly replied as the boy stepped into my room carefully.
"Can we talk?" Chanhee asked, his pink hair glistening with his black roots now showing more visibly in contrast to the now faded peach.
"Will you listen to me this time?" I asked half sarcastically as he sat down at the other end of my bed.
"Of course." He replied surely, crossing his legs carefully before looking where to begin.

"I think I should start since you never gave me the chance to." I began, watching him nod attentively. "I'm sorry. I have no feelings for Juyeon and I hope you would know that too. I got too drunk and so did he. I was irresponsible and incredibly unfair on you."
He nodded, processing my words and clasping his hands thoughtfully.
"I also wanted to apologize. I've been immature with how I handled things, I know you and Juyeon weren't thinking but I should of trusted that it wasn't a conscious decision." He added, scratching the back of his neck in apprehension.
"Can I also ask?" I spoke up, gazing at him inquisitively. "Why did you get so angry?"

"I was just stupidly jealous, that the girl I love was hooking up with one of my friends before she even had me." He replied, attempting to tame his attitude with a sharp exhale.
"Is that why you were being so clingy? In case that happened?" I questioned him further , not expecting what he said next.
"I'm in love with you Y/N. That's why I'm so clingy. That's why I'm so jealous. I just wish I had you all to myself but I couldn't find the words to tell you that." He sighed in frustration, now avoiding eye contact and glaring out the window shamefully.

Finding the words to reply to him with was almost impossible, lost in confusion and even with all my efforts leaving an eery silence between the both of us. Apart of me couldn't believe Chanhee Choi was admitting this to me, although he was quiet, he held an ego. He didn't brag but he knew his worth, his looks and manners were enough to make anybody swoon.

"I love you too." I admitted softly, watching his head snap around hopefully - completely unprepared for what I had to say next. "but i wanna take things slow."

"I can respect that." He nodded, shaking the insecurity it had given him off with a nod. "I understand why too." He was saddened, noticeable in way his voice sank weakly as he spoke. Crawling up to him, I grabbed his hands and clasped them between my own.
"But that doesn't mean I'm going to push you away." I added, searching for a glint of clarity behind his chocolate infused orbs. "Hug?" I asked the awkwardly stiff boy in front of me. With a nod, he wrapped his arms around me warmly. He felt like home, his scent, aura and touch were like a fairytale princes. My eyes fluttered shut instinctively as he traced his delicate hands up my spine adoringly. As if in sync, we both pulled away, our arms loosening and detangling from each other messily.

As he went to get up from the foot of my bed, a guilty feeling in my guts urged me to grab his dainty wrists and pull him back into my covers. However, I didn't. I watched as he glanced at me one last time in the moonlight.
"Goodnight, my love." He smiled sweetly, leaning down on the door handle.
"Goodnight Chanhee." I sighed as he disappeared behind the door again.

Only for me to sleep alone once again...

——

AUTHORS NOTE

awh.. how wholesome (*^ω^*)..

one more day of the week left for most of us to go!.. i hope this week you've managed to learn something new and are able carry that forward into your weekend.. rest well and i hope you've enjoyed this chapter! <3

sending my love always..

clover <3