When I went to my room I slammed the door and laid down on my bed. I felt a tear roll down my cheek. I heard a knock at the door. Part of me hoped it would be my dad. But no Lupin walked it.
"Lily." He started as if trying to test my mood.
"He couldn't even bring himself to come talk to me?" I half asked and half laughed. "Oh no wait he probably could not leave his godson's side." I said, still staring at my ceiling."Lily. Stop that." He said. "You know your dad loved you." He said sitting by my feet.
"Yeah? Then why does it seem like he loves Harry more." I said.
"I don't know. I think your dad feels bad for Harry. Harry had no one to grow up with while you had me." He said.
"Sometimes, I wish and I know it's horrible but I wish that you would have for real been my dad. That Harry would have died that night and Sirius would have gone to prison and that I never would feel this pain of being second to Harry Potter." I said.
"Oh Lily." Lupin said."Lily, come eat please." Lupin said.
"Please leave." I said quietly."Lily you need to eat." He said.
"I will eat later." I said."Lily..." He cautioned.
"Please leave." I said not so quiet this time. He got up but stopped.
"Lily?" He asked.
"Yes?" I said.
"Did you mean what you said down there?" He questioned.
"You mean about going to join the death eaters?" I asked and he nodded. "No I just wanted to get a raise out of Sirius which I don't even know if I did." I laughed.
"Ok. Do you want me to send Geroge up?" he asked. I shook my head.
"No, let him eat." I said. He nodded and closed the door.
I laid there for hours. George came in to check on me but I pretended to be asleep. Sirius was right about how at the start of the summer he said I would have a room all to myself. When I heard the last door close I walked down the stairs. I saw no lights on so I proceeded into the kitchen. I saw Kretcher move.
"Sorry." I said.
I walked over to the fridge and opened it. Mrs.Weasley had left me some soup. I took it out. It was cold. I turned to the elf who was sitting there.
"Can you um..please heat this up for me? I can't do magic outside of school." I said. He looked at me then snapped his fingers. The bowl got instintaly hot. I sat it down at the table and sat down.
"Thank you." I said. "Do you want some?" I asked getting another bowl down and dumped some in for him. I got out a spoon and put it in the soup."Thank you." He said climbing onto the table and taking it.
"You can stay." I said. "I mean if you want." He climbed back onto the table and sat down. He took a bite of the soup.
"Nobody has been this nice to Kretcher since Master Regulus." He said eating the warm soup.
"I just feel bad for how my dad treats you." I said eating the soup.
"Master Sirius treats Krecther horribly." Says the little elf.
"I know. He treats me badly sometimes too." I said.
We sat in silence and ate the soup. When we were both done the elf snapped his fingers and the bowls disappeared.
"Thank you." I said as the elf climbed off the table and back into his cabinet under the sink.
I felt bad for the little elf. I don't know what happened to him but being alone in a house for 15 plus years did not help him. I walked back to my room and laid back down. In a few short days I will be back at hogwarts. I don't know why but for some reason I felt like I was the safest at Hogwarts.
"Lily wake up." A voice said, startling me. I opened my eyes to see Sirius.
"What do you want?" I asked sitting up.
"To talk to you." He said.
"Why? Don't you have a god son to worry about? He should be getting expelled from Hogwarts right about now." I said looking around."Remus told me what you told him last night." He looked down. Dang it Remus never can keep anything to himself.
"So?" I asked.
"Do you really wish that I..." I could tell he could not bring himself to say it. "Did you really mean what you wished?" He asked.
"Honestly?" I said. He nodded.
"It varies. Sometimes I wish that was true but sometimes I don't." I said.
"Lily I am sorry it seems I favor Harry more." He sighed.
"No it does not seem that way, you do favor him more." I said blankly.
"Lily..." He started it was clear he had no idea what to say next.
"Do you love him more?" I asked.
"Do I love my godson more than my daughter?" He asked.
"Yes." I said getting annoyed.
"No, Lily, I could never love someone more than I love you. It seems like I favor Harry because...honestly it feels like I have James back." He said. "I know Harry is not James but I just can't help feel like...with Harry I get James back." He sighed.
"I get that I guess." I looked away.
"Ok well Harry should be back soon with the news." He said getting up and leaving.
"Oh and Lily?" He asked."Yes?" I said.
"If you ever join the death eaters you would never be like Bellatrix or Reguls." He said closing the door.
YOU ARE READING
Lily Black
FanfictionAfter the fall of the Dark Lord, the murder of the Potter's, Lily's dad, Sirius Black went to Azkaban leaving his one-year-old daughter with best friend Remus Lupin. Remus kept Lily from public eyes. She almost never left the house, she did not atte...